


Fiction in the Space Between You and Me

by Verdandi (Zifnabsdragon)



Category: Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Defenders (Marvel TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Biting, Drug-Induced Sex, Dubious Consent, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Mad Scientist, Not Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Compliant, Not to any main charaters, Off screen only, Porn With Plot, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Wet Dream
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-30
Updated: 2019-04-18
Packaged: 2019-07-04 16:04:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 46,909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15844701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zifnabsdragon/pseuds/Verdandi
Summary: Steve and Tony are captured by a crazed scientist who doses them with an experimental serum. They escape, but not before doing something that can't be taken back. Except, apparently, Steve is the only one who remembers what happened. Tony can't remember any of it. Now Steve is burdened with another horrible secret that he can't seem to get the courage to tell Tony about.Then a new drug hits the streets of New York and Steve recognizes it immediately.





	1. A Fabrication of a Grand Scheme

**Author's Note:**

> Set somewhere after Civil War. Not Infinity War compliant. Or maybe it will be after we see what happens next year. Either way, hope you enjoy it.  
> The Rape/Non-Con/Date Rape elements are all off screen and I will warn when they are coming.

The mission had been risky to begin with. But weren’t they all when it came to the Avengers.  

Steve and Tony had been on a just as risky diplomatic mission in Russia when they got the call.

They were meeting with the Russians to try and get them to pardon Bucky for any crimes he committed as the Winter Soldier. They were the last hold outs amongst the major world powers to do so. Fury believed it was because The Winter Soldier had been part of so many Cold War operations and the Russian government was worried it would look like they were condoning those actions if they pardoned him. Fury was the one who had set up the meeting and had made it very clear that the Russian government only wanted Steve and Tony entering their country. The idea of a bunch of Avengers hanging around the Kremlin did not sit well apparently. 

It had actually been going better than Steve had thought it would. The Russian President was sympathetic to what had happened to Bucky and seemed to be more than willing to find some sort of compromise that didn’t make Russia look like they were trying to sweep past mistakes under the rug. 

Being in the same room as Tony for extended periods of time wasn’t going so bad either. When they were in meetings with the President and various government officials, it was easy to stay focused and polite. When they were back at their hotel they stayed in their separate rooms unless they needed to confer or go out and be seen having a civilized dinner together to make sure the idea that they were both once again on the same side was firmly ensconced in the minds of all Russians. For these times they had brought along a few buffers. Happy was with Tony as his bodyguard, since the Russians had politely asked Tony not to bring the armor (Steve suspected he brought it anyway). Steve had a personal assistant, though Steve highly doubted that if he asked Miss Darcy Lewis to go get him a cup of coffee or go pick up his dry cleaning that she would do it. She was very helpful in her own way though. Whenever the planning sessions with Tony started to get at all heated, Darcy would grab Steve by the arm and drag him out of the room for a timeout. Which she literally timed. 

At dinner, her and Happy had a never-ending stream of neutral conversation topics to bring up. Steve suspected that the two of them sat around brainstorming while Steve and Tony were in their meetings. Otherwise it was the world's biggest coincidence that Darcy knew that both Steve and Tony liked sudoku. 

When the call came in from Nat about a Hydra base in the Arctic that was experimenting on the Super Soldier serum it only made sense that Steve and Tony be the ones to go check it out. Nat and Clint had been on an undercover mission when they learned about it. According to what they had found out, a breakthrough had been made and the scientists were sending out feelers for some buyers.  

Steve felt a little trepidation about going on a solo mission with Tony, but he quickly pushed that aside. After all, sometimes you just had to get back on the horse. 

They hadn’t been allowed to bring the Avenjet, but really the only difference between the Avenjet and Tony’s private jet was that the Avenjet didn’t have a disco ball.  

Once the jet had taken off, Tony put it on autopilot and immediately began opening secret compartments filled with tech. Steve wasn’t even a little surprised when Tony sat down in his favorite chair on the jet and the Iron Man suit seemed to just appear out of the fabric and mold around Tony’s frame. Steve was, however, very surprised when a compartment near his own seat slid open to reveal his Captain America suit and his shield.  

“I figured you wouldn’t pack it on your own, so I took the liberty.” Tony explained in an off handed tone. “Well, actually the suits been there for a while, that’s why it’s an older model. The shield, obviously, was grabbed for the trip. Had Wilson pack it up.” 

“Thanks Tony,” Steve said, smiling a bit, touched that Tony had gone out of his way to get Steve's shield. He imagined it had been a very awkward interaction between Tony and Sam.  

Tony shrugged, “It was just common sense. I mean, I know you didn’t want to risk these talks, but honestly, have you seen our track record? Something was bound to come up in one way or another. I’m just glad it turned out to be Hydra and not a rouge ex-KGB something or another trying to assassinate us.” 

Steve had to chuckle, Tony really did have a point. “Still, thank you Tony.” Steve said, trying to convey his sincerity. “And not just for this, but for coming to Russia with me. I know this isn’t easy for you, working to get Bucky pardoned. Especially since-" 

Tony held up a gauntleted hand, “Just stop, okay. We’ve got to get this mission done so let’s just agree to stay away from any subjects that would eventually cause Darcy to have to send us to our rooms. Okay?” 

Steve swallowed down the feelings of regret and longing he felt. It was, after all, his own fault he and Tony weren’t friends anymore. “Yeah. That’s a good idea.” He agreed, doing his best not to sound like the kicked puppy Darcy kept referring to. 

“Great. And if you really feel the need to talk I think that the next item on Happy’s approved conversation topics was the U.S. Senior Open golf tournament.” With that Tony turned away from Steve, effectively ended the brief interaction.  

Steve stared out the window, watching the white landscape below. He shouldn’t let Tony’s stand-offish attitude bother him. It didn’t matter that in the past he and Tony would have been chatting the whole plane ride. And that now, Tony would rather sit in silence then talk to Steve.  

It made Steve think of what had happened that morning.  

He had just stepped out of his hotel room early in the morning, on his way to the gym, when the door to Tony’s room had also opened. Thinking it was Tony, Steve had paused, hoping to at least share a polite greeting. Instead, Steve was greeted to the sight of a blonde-haired man leaving Tony’s room. The man had spotted Steve and had wished him a good morning. Steve had barely been able to choke out a reply, as it felt like his insides were all twisted up like a pretzel.  

Before, whenever he and Tony went on a trip, Tony never picked anyone up. He would always spend his evenings with Steve. Or with the rest of the team if any of them had come along. Now, though, Tony clearly would rather have the company of a tall, blonde-haired, blue-eyed stranger, than Steve’s.  

Steve just needed to accept that this was going to be the new normal, and not let it bother him.  

 

Tony’s jet had hovering capabilities, so they were able to set down close enough to the Hydra base that Tony could fly them the rest of the way with the suit, but far enough away to remain undetected.  

Steve had forgotten how much he enjoyed flying with Tony. Not even the Arctic’s frigid air could dampen his spirits as they skimmed over the snow, Tony’s armored arm wrapped around Steve’s waist while Steve hung on to the hand hold in the armor. And if he held on a little tighter than usual, it wasn’t because he was worried that Tony would drop him. It was more that he didn’t ever want to let go again.  

“No signs of any guards outside the complex,” Tony told him through the comm.  

Steve frowned. “That’s strange. I know we’re in the Arctic but they should still have at least one or two lookouts.” 

“As you said, it’s the Arctic, maybe they got tired of freezing their balls off and went inside for some hot cocoa. They’ve got an impressive looking radar though. FRIDAY is tricking it into thinking we’re just a particularly speedy polar bear.” 

“Good work FRIDAY.” Steve told the AI. 

He got a very reserved,  _“You’re Welcome”_ , back. Steve had learned over the past few months that FRIDAY could hold a grudge.  

“We’ll be within visual soon,” Tony said. “Should we knock?” 

Steve couldn’t help the grin as he felt the rush of adrenaline that always came right before a fight. “It would only be polite.” 

They came over the crest of a large snow drift and Steve immediately saw the complex up ahead. Tony shot off two small missiles that impacted and blew an impressive looking hole in the side.  

Steve tucked in closer to Tony as they flew through the makeshift entrance. As soon as they were clear Tony let go of Steve so Steve could drop down to the ground and come up with his shield held at the ready, Tony hovering by his side.  

They moved quickly, since surprise was their greatest weapon in this case. The more guards they could catch off guard, the easier this would be. It was only after they had turned down another corridor and they met no resistance that Steve began to feel something was wrong.  

“Hold up Iron Man,” Steve called as he slid to a halt. 

Tony pulled up short. As if reading Steve’s mind, Tony said, “Where is everyone? There’s power being used and about a dozen systems up and running but no one's here to use them.” 

“Maybe they figured out we weren’t a polar bear and ran?”  

“Maybe-“ 

FRIDAY suddenly cut in, her voice coming across Steve’s comm. _“There’s a major power surge coming from the main electrical grid. Eminent failure in five seconds!”_

Steve turned to run back the way they had come, even though he knew he’d never make it. But Tony was faster and if he thought Steve could get out on his own maybe he’d go ahead and manage to make it out.  

Steve felt Tony grab him under his arms. “Go!” Steve yelled. Not to tell Tony the obvious that they needed to go, but to tell him to just forget Steve and go instead of wasting time he could be using escaping. And maybe Tony had understood, but he didn’t drop Steve.  

The world exploded around them and Steve felt heat and pain before he blacked out.  

  

Steve woke slowly. It was unusual for him. He normally regained consciousness much faster. He knew something was wrong, but his mind felt fuzzy.  

He must have been drugged, his sluggish brain finally reasoned out. It had to have been something strong and they had to have been dosing him constantly to keep him under.  

Whatever it was, it was leaving his system now. He was feeling more alert with each passing moment.  

The first thing he noticed was that his whole body hurt. The second thing he noticed was that he was stripped down to his shirt and the reinforced spandex shorts that he wore under his uniform. And those had singed holes in them.  

The memory of the explosion snapped back.  

Steve immediately sat up straight, but discovered he could go no further. He was in a metal chair, arms pulled slightly back and secured to the sides of the back of the chair. His legs were spread so that his calves could be secured to the cuffs that were on the outside edge of each leg. There was a metal band going around his neck that pressed against his wind pipe if he tried to lean forward even a little. He could also feel metal bands around his waist and upper thighs. He could hear the hum of electricity and figured it was coming from the chair. 

Steve took a quick glance around as best he could. He was in a small white room. The suspected IV drip was on his left, the bag containing the drug was empty. On his right, lying unconscious on the floor, was Tony.  

“Tony!” Steve strained against the bonds holding him. Tony had been stripped down as well, to just a black undershirt and a pair of silk boxers. “Tony! Wake up!” He wasn’t able to get free of the chair. Whatever the material was holding him it was strong, plus the position he was in didn’t give him the best leverage. “Tony!” Steve was becoming more and more concerned about Tony’s lack of response. He couldn’t see much of him because of how he was lying with his back to Steve, but what he could see was not encouraging. Tony’s back and shoulders were covered in dark bruises and lacerations.  

It took ten more minutes of calling Tony’s name before he got a response.  

Tony startled into consciousness, sitting bolt upright, only to be stopped halfway and being jerked back to the floor. He managed to just catch himself with his elbows before his face smashed into the floor.  

“Wha-?“ Tony tried to straighten up again, slower this time. He tugged on whatever was holding his arms down and Steve could hear the distinct jangle of handcuffs. “Oh, come on.” 

“Are you alright?” Steve asked.  

Tony tried to spin around, but the cuffs were a hindrance. “Steve?” Tony said, looking over his shoulder as best he could.  

“I’m here Tony,” Steve assured him.  

Tony tried to find a way to turn his body, as he twisted several different ways Steve was able to catch a glimpse of a metal loop coming out of the floor, the handcuff chain fed through it.  

“Where are we?” Tony asked, still trying to see Steve.  

“I don’t know, I woke up only ten minutes ago.” 

Tony was finally able to turn towards Steve by twisting the cuff chain. Steve could see the cuff digging painfully into Tony wrists. Tony ignored the pain and instead focused his attention on Steve, looking him up and down, taking in the IV, and giving the chair Steve was cuffed to a once over.  

When he finished, Tony turned back around, letting his cuffs unwind with a little noise of pain. “Looks like they had you on an IV. I’m feeling that lovely fuzzy feeling of having been drugged too, so who knows how long we’ve been out. I assume you’ve already done your thing where you do your best to make your muscles bulge obscenely under the guise of seeing if you can break free?” 

Steve tried not to roll his eyes. “Yes, I’ve already done that. Whatever these restraints are made from they’re strong. I can’t move the chair either.” 

“Yeah, the legs are sunk in concrete. Looks like a recent addition too. My lovely hitching post is also a new addition.” Tony jangled the cuffs around his wrists for emphasis.  

“Could you see a window behind me?” Steve asked.  

“Nope. And none from this angle either. Probably in a basement.” 

Their conversation was interrupted by the door being unlocked. A small man entered. He was wearing a white lab coat over a nice shirt and a tie. Steve noticed his pants looked freshly pressed and his shoes had a nice polish to them. This was the nicest dressed captor Steve had seen since Schmidt.  

“Who are you?” Steve demanded. “Where are we? What do you want?” The questions weren’t original, they weren’t meant to be. Steve, however, had discovered over the years that the bad guys expected you to act a certain way and if you did that they became more relaxed and began making mistakes.  

Tony, of course, had to be his own obnoxious self.  

“Hey, could I maybe get turned around here. It’s a little awkward to discuss our escape plans while literally talking to a wall. I mean talking to this guy is usually like talking to a wall, but I like to see that constipated look he gets when I say something particularly irritating.” 

The man in the lab coat ignored both of them. He stuck an oximeter on one of Steve’s fingers and shone a pen light in Steve’s eyes.  

“Hey!” Tony called. He twisted around again to see what was going on. “Hey, Nurse Jackie! If you want to play doctor you need to get full consent first.” 

The man put away his pen light and made a few notes on the tablet he’d had tucked under his arm. Then he pulled out a syringe from one pocket of his coat and a bottle of black liquid from the other. 

Steve eyed the liquid, a feeling of dread coming over him. “What is that?” He demanded. At the same time, he tried to break the cuffs around his arms again, to no avail.  

The man filled the syringe completely with the black liquid.  

“Don’t you dare!” Tony shouted.  

Steve made one last ditch effort into breaking his bonds. He threw all of his weight to the side. The chair groaned with the strain, but nothing else happened. Steve was helpless as the man plunged the needle into the meat of his thigh. 

“No!” Tony pulled at his cuffs and twisted his body, trying to kick out with his legs. There was no way he could reach the man, who stayed well out of the way.  

The liquid burned as it entered Steve’s blood stream.  

The man noted the time on his watch, tapped a few things out on his tablet, then left without a word.  

“Hey, you alright there?” Tony asked, straining against his bonds.  

Steve swallowed, “Not sure.” The liquid continued to burn through his body, until an intense heat was coursing through his veins. It was painful at first, making Steve clench his jaw and breath deep to fight off the need to move in a vain hope to find relief. 

“Steve, talk to me.” 

Steve’s eyes snapped open, he hadn’t even realized that he’d closed them. Tony was looking at him, eyes filled with concern. Steve wanted to reach out and pull Tony close to him, whisper soothing words against his skin until Tony was calm and plaint in his arms. 

Steve yanked himself out of the fantasy with a sharp shake of his head. What the hell was that? The heat in his veins was consuming him. He was beginning to sweat from it. He bet Tony’s tongue would feel amazing licking the sweat off of him.  

Steve gasped as a thrum of red hot desire spiked in his groin. He tried to focus, he knew that the dark liquid was responsible for the way he was feeling. It wasn’t real, he told himself. It’s the drug. Think past it. 

“Steve!” Tony was calling his name. “Steve, come on, you have to tell me what’s happening to you. What did he give you?” 

Steve needed Tony to stop talking, the very sound of his voice was driving Steve insane, bringing to mind all the ways he could get Tony to stop talking. Like maybe grabbing Tony and smashing their mouths together so that Steve could taste him, plunder his mouth with his tongue. 

"Steve, stay with me. Come on, this isn't the worst situation we've ever been in. I mean, it's not the greatest either. Usually I'm at least wearing more. By the way, remind me to tell Pepper that cybernetic underwear is, in fact, not a step too far." 

 “Shut up!” Steve barked. He hadn’t meant to, he knew perfectly well that that was the absolute worst way to get Tony to shut up. 

“Excuse me?” Tony twisted his body so that Steve could fully appreciate the indignant look he was being given. “I’m gonna assume that was the drug talking and just go ahead and give you a pass.” 

“Tony please,” Steve begged. He needed to think clearly and Tony’s voice was making it impossible. He bet if he shoved his aching cock down Tony’s throat that would get him to shut up. 

Steve jerked his head to the side, as if he could escape the thoughts in his head. The movement caused the band over his neck to bite into the tender skin there. The pain brought with it a moment of clarity. Steve was panting and his skin was slick with sweat. His dick was fully hard and straining painfully against the reinforced crotch of his shorts. What kind of drug had he been given? 

The door to the room opened, the man in the lab coat entered with another man following right behind. The second man wore a suit and had the look of someone who was quite assured in his self-importance. 

The man in the lab coat began speaking to the second man. "As you can see the serum takes affect almost immediately. This, of course, is necessary when dealing with super-human metabolism." The man sounded smug as he went on to explain something about molecules bonding. Steve didn't understand it, but a quick glance at Tony showed that Tony was following the speech and actually looked mildly impressed. That couldn't be good. 

"Hey, quick question." Tony spoke up. "What's it supposed to do? Just wondering. Inquiring minds and such."  

The two men ignored him. 

"How long will it last?" The man in the suit asked. 

"Ah, well, not as long as I would like." Lab Coat said with a look of chagrin. "There is still the issue of the metabolism, I'm afraid. You must act quickly to get what you need from him."  

The fire in his veins was momentarily replaced with ice at the man's words. There was no doubt in Steve's mind what the man meant, not when he'd been given a serum that had increased his libido to the point that he would almost not care what came next.  

"May I?" The man in the suit asked. 

The man in the lab coat gave a quick bow of his head and stepped to the side, but didn't leave the room. Was he really going to stay and watch? Not that it would make it any worse, Steve realized. No, what made it worse was Tony was going to be in the room for it.  

The man in the suit stepped closer to Steve. Steve strained against his bonds, desperate to break them.  

"Wait!" Steve hated how desperate his voice sounded. "Stark doesn't need to be here for this." Tony immediately protested and Steve again envisioned shoving his cock down Tony's throat. He pushed his neck against the sharp band to let himself focus.  

The man in the suit ignored Steve's plea, he just stepped up to Steve and looked him over. 

Steve braced himself for what was coming next. 

"What is your access code for SHIELD?" 

Steve stared at the man for a second, trying to process what he had just been asked. 

The man looked annoyed. "Tell me your access code for SHIELD." He demanded. 

"What?" Steve was normally much better at the pithy dialogue with his captors, but he had a drug surging through his veins that was making it very hard to think past how good it would feel to get some friction anywhere on his body. 

The man in the suit turned back to the other man. "You assured me it worked." 

Lab Coat was looking a little flustered. "I, I told you it should work. _Should_. I haven't been able to test it, of course. That's why I set up this trial. Why I needed the funds and the means you provided to capture Captain America." 

Steve was confused, not a feeling he was used to during combat situations. The man in the suit was asking for his access codes for SHIELD, and he thought that Lab Coat's serum was going to help him get them. Was he going to threaten Steve with rape if Steve didn't give him the codes? If he was, then why hadn't he? 

"I gave you money and resources," The Suit said, looking down his nose at Lab Coat, "because you assured me that you had developed an effective truth serum that would work on enhanced humans." Suit gestured at Steve. "This is not what I invested in." 

Steve stared at the two men as they argued. His drug addled brain processing the words. It was supposed to be a truth serum? Steve couldn't help it, he laughed. The two men scowled at him, and even Tony was eyeing Steve like he was concerned about his sanity. 

"I ain't telling you anything." Steve rasped out. 

Lab Coat looked enraged at Steve's words. "Another dose." He declared. "Another dose is all it will take, you'll see." Lab Coat didn't wait for Suit to respond. He just marched over to Steve, pulled out another syringe, filled it with black liquid, and stabbed it into Steve's thigh. 

The liquid burned and Steve threw his head back and screamed. All of his senses were on fire and the only thing that was going to quench it was a sexual release. He fought against his bonds, desperate for just one hand free to reach down his pants and bring himself to completion. He was sure that the men must realize what the serum was really doing to him. They had to know. They were going to use it against him. 

"Tell me the access codes for SHIELD!" Lab Coat screamed in his face. 

Steve wanted to grab this pathetic little man, shove him to the floor- 

"Steve! What did you do to him you fucker!" 

Tony would help him. Tony would give him release. Tony, right there next to him, chained to the floor. Tony would let him rip those flimsy boxers off and let Steve sink into his hot ass. Steve screamed in frustration as he lunged towards Tony, only to be held back by the chair he was strapped to. He didn't care that Tony flinched back from him, or that he looked scared. All Steve cared about was getting free and getting to Tony. 

"Yes, I think I've seen enough," Suit was saying. As he turned to leave, Lab Coat looked frantic. 

"No, wait! It does work, I'll prove it to you." He pulled out another syringe, but instead of administering more to Steve, he went for Tony. 

Seeing the man go for Tony brought Steve back to his senses. "NO!" Steve yelled. They couldn't give that stuff to Tony, it could kill him. 

Tony saw the little man coming and kicked out at him, trying to keep the man away. He was at a distinct disadvantage though, being chained to the floor. The little man landed a kick to Tony's stomach and Tony was momentarily stunned. It was long enough for the man to grab Tony's hair, yank his head up, and plunge the needle into Tony's neck. Steve watched in horror as the dark liquid was injected into Tony.  

The man in the suit shook his head. "I did not invest time and money into a truth serum for normal people. Good day, doctor." The man strode out of the room, not looking back, even as Lab Coat tried to get him to stop. 

"Wait! I know it works. I can prove it." Lab Coat scurried out of the room. In his haste he accidentally shut the door on his lab coat, it was pulled free immediately, but it had prevented the door from shutting properly. 

The door. It was important. The door was open. Not locked. Steve pressed against the metal band, the pain was only a distant annoyance but it gave Steve something to focus on other than his throbbing cock. "Tony," Steve rasped. "The door, it's still open." 

Tony didn't answer. He was lying on the floor, hunched over and panting. 

"Tony, are you alright?" Tony remained still except for the rapid rise and fall of his chest. The sound of Tony's panting filled the room and Steve's mind supplied him with the mental image of Tony panting from Steve fucking him hard and fast. Steve couldn't suppress a groan of need. 

At the sound, Tony twisted around. His eyes were wide as he looked at Steve like he had just realized he was there. His pupils were dilated and Steve could see the sweat beginning to form on Tony's brow. Steve had an extreme urge to lick it off. 

Steve pushed his neck into the sharp metal again. He needed to focus. The door was open. Tony had been injected with the truth serum that wasn't- … "Shit." Steve looked at Tony again. He was shaking, as if from a nervous energy. And there was a visible bulge in his boxers. “Oh. Oh, yes!” Steve tried to go for Tony again, desperation making him forget everything else.

Tony's eyes momentarily went wider at Steve's attempts to get free. Then he began frantically fighting against his own bonds. Tugging as hard as he could, jerking his body in Steve's direction. Steve couldn't see Tony's wrists, but he was sure that the force of Tony's struggles had to be doing quite a bit of damage to the delicate skin there. 

"Tony! Stop! Stop! You're going to hurt yourself!" 

Tony ignored Steve's admonishment. If anything, it was causing Tony's struggles to become more fervent. His face was dripping with sweat now. Actually, it was his whole body. Steve could see how the fabric of Tony's undershirt was clinging to his muscular chest. The silk of his boxers out lining the curve of his ass. 

Steve tried to thrust his hips up to get some kind of friction only to be frustrated by the restrains on his thighs. "Please, please, please, please, please …" He wasn't sure who he was begging, he only knew he needed relief. He fought the bonds again, his thrashing aggravating the cut on his neck. The pain wasn't helping him focus anymore, instead it seemed to increase his need. The second dose of the serum was overwhelming him. He needed to think. The door was open. He needed to think. Tony was hurt, Tony was .. He needed Tony so bad. So bad. He needed … 

Suddenly one of Tony's hands wrenched free from the cuffs. Steve was momentarily brought back to reality by the sight of Tony's wrist scrapped raw and bloody. The combination of blood and sweat must have made his hands slippery enough to get himself free. And once one wrist was free, the cuffs easily slid through the loop in the floor and Tony was free. Which was good, because the door was open and Tony could .. he could free Steve and Steve could grab Tony .. and ... and push him down to the floor. 

Tony, still panting hard, began to crawl towards Steve. 

"Don't," Steve knew if Tony came closer then Steve was going to do something horrible to him, he wouldn't be able to help himself. As it was, he forgot he was restrained as he tried to get his hands on Tony. To grab him, thrust into him, come on him, in him. "Tony, please!"  

Tony reached the chair and pulled himself up using Steve's thighs. The simple touch sent a shiver of pleasure through Steve. "Ah!" Tony's hands felt like fire against his bare skin. "Please!" And Tony answered Steve's plea by grabbing the waist of Steve's shorts and yanking them down as far as they could go. It wasn't very far, with the metal bands in the way, but it was enough that Steve's cock could finally spring free. The relief was almost as intense as the pleasure of Tony touching him. 

Then Tony sucked Steve’s cock down. 

Steve flung his head back and howled as his whole body convulsed with pleasure. The metal bands cut into his skin as he tried to arch his back as he came in Tony’s hot mouth.  

But it wasn't enough. Once was never enough. Not since Steve had become a Super Soldier. And now, with another experimental serum coursing through his veins, he felt like he was going to go out of his mind from the need to come again. "More! Please, more! I need, Tony, I need." He was so caught up in his desperation he didn't realize Tony was moving until the other man was climbing into his lap. That's when Steve also realized that Tony's boxers were gone. 

Tony's cock was thick and heavy and Steve had an extreme desire to get his mouth on it. He even tried to bend his head down to get to it, but the sharp edge of the band around his neck prevented him. Leaving Steve sobbing in frustration. 

Steve watched, fascinated, as Tony's cock was pressed up against Steve's abs, as Tony positioned his ass directly over Steve's cock. When Tony reached behind himself, Steve suddenly realized what they were about to do. "Tony," he gasped, thinking to stop him or encourage him. He wasn’t sure anymore. Then he felt the head of his cock press against the cleft of Tony's ass and all protests fled. Tony did something with his hand behind him while his hips thrust up and down, rubbing his cock against Steve's abs, making Steve whimper with need. 

Then Tony grabbed Steve's cock, slick from come and spit, and sank down onto it.  

"AH!" Steve yelled, the sensation of the head of his cock popping over the tight muscles of Tony's hole nearly making Steve come again. "Tony!" It wasn't enough. It was amazing, but, just nearly, not enough. "More!" Steve tried desperately to move his hips. To free his hands so he could grab Tony's hips and force him down onto Steve's cock. That was all he needed, his hands free. Then he could just lift Tony up and down, fuck him that way. "More!" Steve begged. "I need more, so bad." Tony sank down on Steve cock, but it wasn't fast enough. "I need more. Please!"  

Tony started to move his hips up and down, his bare, muscular thighs working to slide his tight hole up and down Steve's cock. Tony gripped Steve's shoulders, nails digging into to Steve's slick skin.  Tony's face was only inches away from Steve, and Steve, in a fit of desperation for contact, lunged forward to capture Tony's mouth. It wasn't a kiss, so much as heavy panting against each other's mouths as they slid tongues together. The metal band cutting off Steve’s air supply, making him light headed. 

Tony's thrusts became more desperate and Steve was ready for his climax this time. He pulled his mouth away from Tony's so he could suck in a huge breath seconds before his balls tightened and he came in Tony's ass. "AH! Ah! Tony!" Tony's ass stroked Steve through his climax as Steve's cum made everything slicker. 

Tony moaned against Steve's ear, his hips speeding up. Steve could hear the slick sound of Tony sliding up and down Steve's cock and Steve knew he had just one more climax in him.  “One more, please. Just one more." Steve tugged at his bonds again. He just needed to come one more time and it would be enough. "Please, harder. I need, I need harder." He wanted free from the chair. He wanted to drag Tony down to the ground, suck Tony’s cock, shove his cock in Tony's mouth, slam into Tony over and over again until he was coming, filling Tony up, hearing Tony sob from how good it felt. 

Tony was sobbing. Steve was vaguely aware of it. Tony was positioning his thighs, gasping for breath, a desperate feel to his movements. "I want to grab your cock," Steve confessed. "Let me touch you," he begged, as if Tony was the one preventing him from doing so. "I want to touch you." 

Steve tried to kiss Tony again, but Tony was mouthing at the area behind Steve's ear and seemed determined to ignore Steve's whimpers of need. "I need you, Tony. I need you so bad." Tony's movements began to lose their fluid motion, becoming jerky and frantic. He dropped his head down to Steve's shoulder, his hair tickling Steve's chin. "Come for me, Tony," Steve gasped. He wanted to feel it. It would feel so good. He needed to feel Tony coming.  

He started babbling. Any thought in his head just spilling out as Tony fucked himself on Steve's cock. "Come for me. I want to feel it. I want you to come all over me. It feels amazing. Your ass. Tony! Harder. Come on me!" 

He felt Tony's whole body stiffen, then he was biting into Steve's shoulder as he came. Steve felt the pain, felt the way Tony's ass clenched around his cock, felt the hot cum as it smeared across his abs. It was too much. It was perfect. Steve screamed, coming for a third time. The metal of the chair groaned against the strain of keeping Steve's convulsing body still.  

When he was done, his whole body going slack, breath trying to even out, he felt Tony slip off his lap. Watched him fall to a heap on the floor.  

"Tony?" Steve croaked out. "Tony?" Steve's mind began to clear, like clouds dispersing after a storm. Tony's body had to be overwhelmed with the "truth" serum that had been given him. They needed to get out of there. Get Tony some help. "Tony? Can you get me free? Tony?" Steve tried to break his bonds again, and was surprised by the jolts of pain that went through his body. He looked down and gasped.  

His thighs and abs were covered in sperm and blood. Steve felt horror, thinking it was Tony's blood. A moment later he realized that the blood was coming from where he had cut himself against the metal bands. It was only a tiny bit of relief, but Steve would take it. Even if any of the blood was Tony's, it had most likely been from Tony's wrists since there was no blood on or around Steve's penis. 

The reality of what had just happened crashed down on Steve. 

Steve felt bile rising in his stomach and he fought to keep it down. He had to focus on getting them out of there and getting Tony to a hospital. "Tony, I need your help to get free." No response. "Tony?" He couldn't see the upper half of Tony's body, just his legs sprawled across the floor. "Tony! We need to get out of here. Can you get me out of the chair?" There were small, deliberate movements in Tony's legs that indicated he was at least conscious. "Tony? Can you see any circuitry for the chair? Maybe you can short it out or something."  

Steve eyed the open door. They had been making so much noise, there was no way the man in the lab coat hadn't heard them. They needed to get out of there fast, before the man came back. Obviously, there weren't any guards, otherwise they would have shut the door or come in when Tony got loose. That was good, Steve could take out one lab geek, as long as Tony got him free. "Tony, you have to get me out of this chair." He was just going to keep talking to Tony until he got a response. "Tell me what you can see. Is there a way to get me out of these cuffs? Tony?" 

Tony's legs jerked, then went still. The electric hum from the chair wound down and the cuffs opened with a click.  

Steve got himself out of the chair and to Tony's side as fast as he could, not taking even a second to assess his own blood covered body. Tony's eyes were closed and his breathing was shallow. In one outstretched hand, Tony was loosely holding an electrical cord from the chair. He must have yanked it out of the wall. Steve noticed that Tony's wrists were still bleeding. He felt for Tony's pulse and discovered it was going far too fast.  

"Tony? You with me?" Tony made a small noise in the back of his throat that Steve decided to take as a yes. "Come on, were getting out of here."  

Steve yanked his shorts back up, trying not to think of the fluids they were soaked with. He grabbed Tony's boxers, planning on putting them back on him as soon as they were out of the room. He then pulled Tony up and positioned him with an arm over Steve's shoulders. Steve gripped Tony tight around his waist and supported him as they made their way out the door. 

Outside there was just a small hallway, it ended shortly after the door to the room. The rest continued a little way to a set of stairs that went up to, what looked like, a cellar door. Across the hall there was another room. Steve tried the door, it opened and Steve could see that the room was filled with medical equipment, including a set of scrubs and a few lab coats hanging on a coat rack. 

Steve hurried over and grabbed the scrubs. "Let's get these on you," He told Tony as he carefully set him down. He used Tony's boxers and one of the lab coats to clean Tony up as best he could. He even steeled himself and wiped away the mess between Tony's legs, glad that there still didn't seem to be any bleeding. After giving himself a quick wipe down, he stuffed the dirty clothes into a nearby trash bin, then quickly dressed Tony in the scrubs. Tony made small noises of protest, but cooperated enough that they were able to get it done. 

Steve grabbed the last two lab coats and made Tony put them on. They wouldn't give much protection against the frigid Arctic air, but it was better than exposed skin. Steve did a quick search to see if he could find anything to put on Tony's feet, but found nothing. He would just have to carry Tony once they got outside.  

Finally, Steve got a roll of gauze and wrapped Tony's wrists to stop the bleeding. Satisfied that that was the best that could be done at the moment, he pulled Tony back up and headed towards the stairs.  

At the top, Steve tried the handle to the door and was relieved when it opened easily. He pushed it opened and was met with fresh air and a light drizzle hitting his face. He blinked in confusion. The scene that greeted them outside the cellar door was not the white, bitter landscape of the Arctic. Instead there were grey skies, green grass, and a lush forest. 

Where were they?  

Steve stepped out on to a path and looked around. The path lead to a nice cottage that looked like the ones found in the countryside of south France. There was a small garden in the front with flowers and vegetable plants, though it did look over run with weeds. There was a driveway that lead down the hill the cottage sat on. At the end of the driveway Steve could see the man in the lab coat. He was yelling at a black car that was turning the corner and disappearing down the hill. "I will finish this! You'll see! And when you come back to buy my product, you will find the price tripled!"  As soon as the car was out of site, the man turned back to the cottage, and immediately spotted Steve and Tony. "Hey!" The man reached into his pants pocket and pulled out a small gun. 

Steve flung Tony over his shoulder and took off towards the cover of the trees. He heard the soft sound of an air pistol firing, then the 'thunk' of something hitting a nearby tree. He glanced over to see a tranquilizer dart sticking out of the trunk of a tree.  

Steve raced into the forest, ducking and weaving to avoid the tranq darts that were narrowly missing them. For a lab rat, this guy was a surprisingly good shot. Fortunately, he wasn't fast and Steve quickly outpaced him. Only when Steve could not hear the man anymore did he feel safe enough to stop and get his bearings.  

They were in a dense forest, on the slope of a hill. Steve couldn't see any signs of civilization, and he couldn't hear anything except the sounds of the forest. Deciding it was safe to stop for a moment, he carefully lowered Tony down to the ground. He first checked to make sure Tony hadn't been hit with any darts. Then he took Tony's pulse again, it was still going far too fast. Tony was barely conscious, mumbling to himself. 

"We've got to get you to a hospital." Steve said. He pulled Tony back up and got him to lean against Steve's side for support. Since towns and roads were built at the base of hills, Steve started heading downward. He was more careful now that they had lost their pursuer and Tony was just able to keep himself upright with Steve's help. He didn't know how far they were from any civilization and he figured walking would keep Tony's blood pumping and work the drug out of his system just a little faster. 

The forest around them was dense and cool. The canopy overhead keeping out most of the light rain. The trees and plants were those commonly found throughout Europe. Steve was very familiar with European forests, having spent most of the war running around in them. He even spotted a flower that he knew grew in the southern part of France and northern part of Spain. So, they were in either France or Spain. Either way, it was a long way from the Arctic, where their team would be looking for them. 

If the little guy in the lab coat had brought Steve and Tony’s armor with them to the cottage then the other Avengers would be able to find them. Tony had hidden so many homing beacons in their stuff that there was no way they all would have been found. Which made Steve think that the man hadn’t brought their stuff with them. It would explain why they were both stripped down to their underwear. Plus, the trip from the Arctic to France would have taken at least half a day. Friday would have sent out a distress call as soon as the explosion knocked them out. And since no one was here to rescue them, it meant they didn’t know where to look. 

Steve could imagine the team desperately searching the frozen wastes of the Arctic. He wished he could get a message to them, let them know he and Tony were okay. 

Except, if they came and found them now they would know what had happened. They would see the state they were in and they’d know. There’s no way they could not know. Not with Steve’s shorts stained with semen and blood. Or the way they stank of sex. Or the wet spot soaking through Tony’s pants. 

Steve stumbled and fell. He managed to keep Tony from hitting his head on a rock, but it was a near thing. He laid Tony down on the ground as gently as he could. His hands were shaking and he felt sick. Everything that had happened came crashing back to the front of his mind.  

He sat huddled on the ground, trying to breathe deeply and hold back the sobs that were trying to escape. He couldn’t think about it. Not now. Not when Tony needed him. He squeezed his eyes shut against the tears. He wouldn’t fall apart. Tony needed him. 

A rumble of thunder made him look up. The sky had turned an ominous dark gray and the tops of the trees were swaying as the wind picked up. 

Steve got up quickly and pulled Tony up. Tony’s eyes were shut and he was responding. Steve hefting him up in a fireman’s carry and set off down the hill again. He needed to get Tony to a hospital. 

Seconds later, the sky opened and released its rage. 

 


	2. Sometimes a Lie is the Best Thing

They were soaked within minutes.  

Steve remembered soldiers using downpours like this one to take quick showers in the middle of a battlefield. 

He moved as quickly as he could, searching for shelter even as he continued to move downhill. The trees overhead were not offering much in the way of protection from the storm, especially since they had moved into a sparser area of the forest. The ground was becoming slippery and muddy and Steve was forced to slow his pace after the second time he almost went down.  

Finally, they got back into a denser area of the forest and Steve found a grove of trees to hide under that were blocking out at least half of the rain. Steve choose the thickest part of the grove to hunker down in. He pulled Tony close to him, chest to chest, to try and keep his core warm and stave off hypothermia. The rain had cooled off the burning fever that the drug had brought on, but Steve was becoming concerned by how rapidly Tony was still cooling off. 

The storm raged on around them. The forest getting darker as evening fell. Steve wrapped his arms tightly around Tony, trying to keep him as warm as possible. He knew that if he removed their wet shirts and had skin to skin contact it would be better. He just couldn’t bring himself to do it. He tried to rationalize that it wouldn’t help that much, or that he didn’t want to disturb Tony. Anything to shut out the real reason. 

This was the same position they’d been in not less than an hour ago. The drug coursing through their veins, making everything feel incredible. 

Steve squeezed his eyes shut as he tried to block out the memories. He was better than that. He wasn’t going to dwell on the images swirling through his mind. Tony deserved better than that.  

Why did this have to happen now? Just when he and Tony were starting to get back to a place where they could actually be in the same room as each other again. Yes, they still needed supervision to help ease the tension, but no one had to physically restrain them anymore. 

Steve thought of the bonds of the chair, restraining him instead of letting him get at Tony like he wanted to.  

No! He wouldn’t think about it. He wouldn’t! 

Sure, Steve knew this wasn’t his fault. And Bucky killing Tony’s parents wasn’t Steve’s fault either, but look where that had led. How were he and Tony supposed to move past the fact that they had had sex? A lot of sex. A lot of very enthusiastic sex.  

He had to think of something else. Anything else. He looked around the forest, hoping for some inspiration. 

The forest was so like the many he had been in during the war that Steve almost expected to see his fellow soldiers huddled around him in the rain. He remembered many nights like this where they only had each other to count on. Would Tony ever be able to count on Steve again? Or had this incident destroyed the last hope that the two of them being able to regain any trust? If only Steve could take back the last few hours. Erase it all from existence. It would be so much easier that way.   

As the night wore on, Steve continued to wrestle with his thoughts. A million different scenarios went through his head. Ways that he could fix what had happened. Ways that he could’ve prevented it from ever happening in the first place. Each idea becoming more ridiculous than the last.  

In his arms Tony’s breathing was beginning to even out. At least one thing was working out better. He no longer feared for Tony’s life. The fever was also down. Now if they just could get out of the rain and get warm and dry.  

A crack of lightning lit up the sky, thunder booming immediately after. Steve worried about the lightning hitting the trees but there wasn’t much other choice.   

A few hours before dawn, Tony stirred in Steve’s arms. 

“Steve?” Tony mumbled into Steve’s chest. 

“I’m here Tony,” Steve said, trying to be reassuring but not how sure how reassuring that was after everything that just happened. 

“Where are we?” Tony asked. “Why am I wet?” Tony lifted his head up and started looking around. “Hang on, this is not a frozen wasteland. Where’s all the snow? Are we having a global warming crisis?” 

“We’re not in the Arctic,” Steve said. “I think we're somewhere in central Europe.” 

“How did we escape? And what was that drug?” Tony pulled back to look at Steve in concern. “Are you okay?” 

“I-I’m fine,” Steve stuttered, uncomfortable with where the conversation was heading. “It burned out of my system fast. Are you okay? That stuff was meant for enhanced, not you.” 

Tony frowned. “What are you talking about?” 

“The drug he gave you. Are you feeling alright?” 

“What drug?” 

Steve regarded Tony. “The guy in the lab coat he gave you a dose of the, um, the truth serum.”  

Tony shook his head. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”   

“Tony, what’s the last thing you remember?” Steve asked, cautiously. 

Tony thought for a moment. “That crazy guy injected you with the black stuff. You started acting really off right away. Even yelled at me to shut up.” Tony gave Steve a reproachful look. Steve mumbled an apology. “Then the other guy was asking you about SHIELD security codes. Was it a truth serum? Is that what was going on?”  

“Well it was supposed to be one, but it didn’t work on me like it was supposed to.” Steve said carefully. “You really don’t remember what happened after that? 

Tony frowned, “Things start getting fuzzy around the time that you were laughing, then I don’t really remember what happened after that. It’s that same feeling you get after blacking out drunk. Like you know there is something to remember but you can’t recall it.” Tony shrugged, as if it wasn’t a big deal. 

Steve tried to control his breathing. Tony didn’t remember what had happened. He didn’t remember them - he didn’t remember having -. 

“You said he injected me with that stuff. What happened? Did I start spilling all my deepest darkest secrets?” Tony was trying to sound unconcerned but Steve could hear the undercurrent of stress in his voice. 

“No, no, it’s okay, it just overwhelmed you and you started burning up and becoming frantic.” It wasn’t a lie. That is what had happened. 

“So how did we get out?” Tony asked. 

“You were pulling on the cuff so much and sweating so badly that the blood and the sweat must have made your hand slippery. You slipped one of the cuffs and got free.” 

“Ah, that would explain the pain there.” Tony interjected. He pulled one of his arms free and gingerly inspected his wrist. The bandages were soaked through with rain and blood. Steve wasn’t sure how much help they were doing anymore. “How’d we get out of the room?” Tony asked, moving his arm back down to huddle close to Steve again. “Did you kick down the door and I missed it? You know how much I love your feats of strength. No wait, back up. How’d you get out of the chair?” 

Steve was glad Tony felt comfortable teasing him. It made things a little easier. “You saw that there was a plug for the chair I was in and you unplugged it. The guy in the lab coat had left the room in such a hurry he didn’t close the door properly, so we were able to get out of the room. I found some scrubs and lab coats. I dressed you in them because,” because Tony was half naked and there was semen dripping down his legs, “because I thought we were still in the Arctic. And you weren’t very responsive.” 

“I missed out on you dressing me! Damn it!” Tony heaved a very put-upon sigh. “I have the worst luck.” 

Steve fumbled with what to say. He could tell Tony the truth, tell him what had really happened. 

“So why are we now in this lovely, all be it, very soggy forest?” Tony asked. 

Steve picked the narrative back up, pushing down his guilt. “We had to make a break for the woods because lab coat guy had a tranquilizer gun. I was worried that the darts were filled with something strong enough to take me down. We’ve been in the woods since then.” 

“How long since we escaped?” Tony asked. 

“Just a few hours. It was evening time when we got out. I got us as far away as I could, then it started raining heavily. So I found this shelter. It’s the best I could do,” Steve said, cringing as rain drops continued to soak them through. “I’m sorry.” 

“You’re sorry?” Tony laughed. “You’ve been having to haul my heavy ass around this forest and you’re sorry?” 

Steve chuckled, “You’re not that heavy to me.” 

Suddenly Tony shivered.  

Steve wrapped his arms tighter around Tony. “I wish we had something better than medical scrubs for you.” 

“It’s better than what we were wearing,” Tony pointed out.  

Tony started wiggling around on Steve’s lap. Making Steve very uncomfortable and forcing him to try not think about how good Tony’s ass could feel.  

Tony wrapped his arms around Steve’s waist and shoved his hands up underneath Steve’s shirts. “Don’t get any ideas. You’re just really, really warm,” Tony said, shivering again.  

Steve let out a breath. It was good he hadn’t told Tony what had happened, otherwise Tony wouldn’t feel comfortable being so close to Steve in order to stay warm. “It will be light soon,” Steve said, “we can start looking for help again.” 

“S-Sounds good,” Tony shuddered, borrowing down as close to Steve as he could get. “I really want a cup of coffee. Maybe we can find a gas station, I’d even drink the nasty gas station coffee right now.” 

“If we’re where I think we are, then there’s no such thing as nasty gas station coffee, only good coffee."

“Thank Norse deity,” Tony said.  

They sat there under the trees, Tony’s shivering becoming more and more pronounced as time went on.  

Slowly the sky began to lighten, despite the heavy cloud cover. Finally, it got light enough that Steve felt comfortable going back out into the woods. He gently nudged Tony up. “Come on, we’re going to go find you some help.” 

Tony was shivering violently by this point. “N-n-no, it'll be t-too cold-d.” 

Steve ignored his protesting and pulled him up to his feet, trying to keep as much body contact as he could to keep Tony warm. “It’ll be okay. You’ll be warmer once we get moving.” 

Tony explained exactly where Steve could shove that idea, but started moving anyway, much to Steve’s relief. Tony was quickly heading towards hypothermia, the only thing that had probably kept it at bay this whole time was the way they have been huddled all night. 

Steve and Tony stepped out from under the trees, the rain was much harder out here but still not as bad as it had been the night before. 

Steve began walking them downhill again. Saying a prayer that they would quickly find help. After an hour of walking Steve’s prayer was answered. He spotted a narrow path in the forest. It look different from an animal trail, more like one made by a person walking back-and-forth through the area often.  

“Come on Tony, look there’s a path.” 

Tony didn’t respond. His teeth were chattering so loudly that Steve could hear it. “We’re going to find you some help,” Steve assured him. He walked them down the path as quickly as he could manage, practically carrying Tony. Relief washed over him when he caught sight of a little house through a break in the foliage. It looked similar to the cottage that they had come from but this one was a different color and had vines growing up the side. Hopefully whoever lived here would be awake. Steve got up to the door and knocked softly, resisting the urge to pound frantically on the door and get the help immediately. He didn’t want to scare the person inside. Two strange men showing up on their doorstep would be disconcerting enough.  

From inside the house he heard a female voice call out in French, “Who’s there?” 

Steve, replying in French, called out, “I’m sorry to bother you, Madame. My friend and I were lost in the woods last night. We need help, please!” There was no response from the woman. He really needed to get Tony inside and warm. He was debating breaking down the door and apologizing later when the curtain over the window parted and a very old woman peered out at them. Steve tried to look as non threatening as possible. The woman’s eyes went wide when she saw them. She disappeared from view and he heard the slide of the lock. 

The woman opened the door and gestured for Steve and Tony to come inside. “Oh dear, what happened?” She placed a wrinkled hand on Tony’s wet forehead.  

“I’m so sorry to bother you, Madame,” Steve repeated, “my friend is freezing and I need to get him warm right away.” Steve was ready to offer money, favors, signed selfies. Whatever it would take to get this woman to help him.  

The woman, however, needed no convincing. “Yes, yes,” she said waving Steve further into the house. “Quickly, this way.” 

Steve follow behind her. She was spry for an old lady and in no time she had lead him to the bathroom where there was a clawfoot bathtub. The women begin fiddling with the knobs and Steve heard the water running. 

“Get him undressed,” she ordered Steve. “Let’s get him in the warm water.” 

Steve hesitated for a second. He had to undress Tony. Tony was shaking so badly he couldn’t do it himself. He hadn’t told Tony what had really happened when they were prisoners and now he had to make things worse by undressing Tony. 

“Quickly!” The woman admonished. 

Steve shook himself out of his panic. He needed to put everything aside and just focus on helping Tony. He ended up ripping the scrubs off of Tony. It was much easier than trying to get the wet clothes over Tony’s shivering, stiff limbs. As soon as Tony was undressed Steve tried to get him to climb into the tub. Unfortunately, Tony was shivering so badly that he nearly fell. Steve finally just picked him up and placed him gently inside the water.  

The water wasn’t hot, it was really only just above regular body temperature. To Tony it probably felt scolding though and he hissed as the water enveloped him.  

“Lie back Tony,” Steve said, encouragingly. “We’ve got to get you warm.” 

Tony tried to lie back, but he was still shivering so badly that he almost went under the water. Fortunately Steve was still close and was able to grab him and prop him up.  “S-sorry,” Tony stuttered out.  

“It’s okay Tony.” Steve assured him. “Just relax, I’ve got you.” He kept his arm behind Tony’s back, making sure that he didn’t go too far down into the water but still keeping him in enough to help warm his body up as quickly as possible. Steve didn’t even realize the little old lady had left the room until she was coming back in handing him towels.  

“You need to get dry too,” she said. 

“Thank you, Madame.” 

“I’ll make you some tea. Just stay here with him.” The old lady shuffled out of the bathroom. Leaving Steve and Tony alone.  

Steve monitor the temperature of the bathwater. When he felt it was cooling off too much he drained the tub, to Tony’s dismay, and refilled it with warmer water, earning him a soft sigh from Tony.  

A few minutes later the lady came back in holding two steaming mugs of tea. She offered the first one to Tony, who had stopped shivering enough that he could take it without spilling. “You’re my new favorite person,” Tony told her.  

She smiled down at him before giving Steve the second mug. “I don’t have any clothes that will fit you two, I’m so sorry. I do have some blankets that you can wrap in.” 

“Thank you, Madame,” Steve said. “That would be wonderful.” 

“I was just going to make myself some breakfast before you arrived,” the woman said. “I’ll make some for you both, as well.” 

“Thank you so much Madame. We appreciate your hospitality.” 

The woman smiled at him, “You may call me Marianne.” 

“My name is Steve and this is Tony.” Steve said. Tony shakily saluted her with his mug of tea. 

The woman smiled again. “I know who you are.”  

“Oh, you do?” It wasn’t too surprising, he was Captain America after all. And Tony was, well, Tony Stark. He just didn’t think that they were too recognizable in thier bedraggled state.  

“Yes, I have met you before,” Marianne said. “I was part of the French resistance as a young girl. You and your Howling Commandos helped us bomb a bridge.” 

“I’m afraid I don’t remember you. Though I do remember several very young resistance fighters."

Marianne laughed, “I am looking very different nowadays. But you look exactly the same. I am glad that I was able to finally return the favor and help you in your time of need.” She patted Steve’s shoulder. “You need to get out of these wet clothes. I know that you may not get sick like the rest of us, but it cannot be comfortable for you. Drink your tea I will grab you those blankets.”  

“Only you.” Tony said as soon as Marianne had left. “Only you would be able to find somebody who knows you in the middle of a stupid forest somewhere in the middle of Europe.” 

“Are you feeling better?” Steve asked. 

“Yes I am. I can sit up on my own now.” 

Steve blushed and pulled his arm away quickly. “Sorry.” 

Tony waved away the apology. “Nah, I would probably have drowned otherwise. Do as the nice old lady said and get out of your wet stuff. You look like something the cat literally dragged in and then spat back up.” 

“Thanks,” Steve huffed. He sat down on the floor next to the tub and began to dry himself off with one of the towels. He still didn’t undress though. It was bad enough that Tony was completely naked, Steve doing his level best to only look at his face. He didn’t want to make things even more awkward when he finally told Tony the truth. 

The bath water grew cool again and Steve drained it and filled it up, this time making it piping hot. 

Tony relaxed back into the water. “I hate the cold. It’s the worst. Well, maybe being super hot is the worst. I don’t know, I like things about seventy two degrees. 

“I know what you mean,” Steve said, sipping his tea. “I hate the cold too. I’d rather have the rain than snow, though.  

“Seriously. How considerate of our captor to bring us somewhere much warmer so that we could escape without freezing to death.” Tony joked.  

Steve smiled into his mug. “Yeah, real considerate.” 

Marianne came back in carrying two large oversized fluffy blankets and a plate of cheese, fruit and bread. “You are looking better,” Marianne told Tony. 

Tony smiled his most winsome smile. “Thank you. Your hospitality has been a healing balm.”

Steve had to hide his smile. He'd heard Thor using that exact same phrase.  

Marianne just shook her head and smiled. “All the stories are true about you being a charmer.” 

Tony winked. “Guilty as charged.” 

Marianne handed the plate of food to Steve, noting that he was still in his wet clothes. She gave Steve a stern look that reminded Steve of the looks his Mom used to give him when he was being ornery. “Eat something, at least.” 

“Oui, Madame.” 

After Tony had eaten a little of the fruit and cheese, pushing most of it on Steve, and drinking down his tea he looked mostly recovered. His cheeks were flushed with the heat from the tub and he was no longer shivering. 

“I’ll leave you to get out.” Steve said, standing up and getting ready to turn away. 

Tony hesitated. “See the thing is, my legs feel really shaky still.” 

Steve look down at Tony. He looked chagrin at having to admit he needed help. 

“I don’t want to fall and crack my head open on the tub. That would just ruin my whole day,” Tony said trying for lightness. 

“Let me help you,” Steve said, reaching down. It was good that he hadn’t told Tony what had happened. He never would have felt comfortable asking for help and maybe he would have fallen. 

He got Tony up out of the tub and standing, mostly steady, on the bathmat. Steve then grabbed a towel and help Tony dry off. Tony was shaking again but it certainly wasn’t from the cold this time, since the bathroom was toasty warm.  

“Whatever was in that serum does not agree with me,” Tony said. “I feel like I’m recovering from a bad flu. And everything hurts, everywhere. And I do mean everywhere.” 

Steve almost stumbled at that, but managed to recover and focus. “We’ll get you to a hospital. I’ll call the team, get them here.” 

“You’re going to have the team invade this nice lady‘s house. That will be a sight.” 

Steve wrapped Tony up in the blanket and helped him out of the bathroom.  

Marianne was waiting for them in the hallway. “Would you like to rest for a bit?” 

“Please,” Tony sounded desperate for some rest. 

Marianne lead them down the hall to a small bedroom. “It’s not much, but you can rest here.” 

“It’s perfect,” Tony stumbled forward and, with Steve’s help, crawled into the bed. “Is this a handmade quilt. Very nice. I love the lace on the pillow. I give this place five stars.” 

“I’ll call the team.” Steve said, once Tony was settled. 

“Sure. That sounds like a great idea. I’m just gonna close my eyes for a minute. Tell Rhodey to bring bagels when he comes to pick us up.” 

Steve smiled, “I will.” Steve left Tony lying on the bed dozing off. 

He found Marianne sitting at the table of her small kitchen.              

“May I use your phone please.” 

“Of course.” Marianne gestured to a room just off the kitchen with a small table where her telephone sat. 

“Thank you,” Steve said. “And thank you again for all your help.” 

Marianne smiled and shoot him away. 

Steve went to the phone and picked it up. There was a main emergency line that he could call that would immediately connect him with Friday. Instead he dialed another familiar number. The line picked up and a gruff voice barked out, “Who is this?” 

Steve felt relief wash over him at the familiar voice of his friend. “Hey Buck, how’s it going?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to show Steve's reasoning for not telling Tony what really happened, and to make it something he could easily justify. Yet any outsider would see it was weak reasoning at best.  
> Our sweet and spry French granny may or may not be based off someone I know ;)  
> Chapter title is from "Telling Stories" by Tracy Chapman  
> Comments and kudos are always appreciated.


	3. In Remembrance of Your Bad Dream

Having a bunch of larger than life superheroes in Marianne’s small kitchen was quite the sight. Natasha, Clint, Bruce, Sam, Bucky, and Rhodey all crowded into the small area. It had taken them several hours to get there since they had been searching in the Arctic, worried that Steve and Tony were lost somewhere in the snow and ice.  

Tony had slept for most of the time. When he did wake up the effects of the serum seemed to have worn off completely. The only residual problem was a general feeling of fatigue and a little shakiness in his limbs. 

Bruce had checked him over, re-bandaged his wrists, and taken a few blood samples to check in the lab later.  

Steve worried that he should have told Bruce what the serum had actually done to them. However, since Bruce declared there didn’t seem to be any lasting effects from the drug, Steve decided to wait and talk to Bruce about it after he had had a chance to talk to Tony first. 

They all said goodbye to Marianne, Tony and Steve thanking her once again for her help. She gave Steve an extra hug and a kiss on the cheek. Tony promised to send her something nice to thank her properly. 

On the flight home Steve sat next to Sam and Bucky, trying to give Tony some space. Or at least that’s what he reasoned he was doing. He wasn’t avoiding Tony, he just didn’t want to accidentally say something that would make the other suspicious. As it was, he felt as though everyone must know what had happened. He logically knew that wasn’t the case, he just couldn’t shake the feeling. At one point when Sam asked him how he was doing, Steve got defensive and told him he was fine and it wasn’t like it was the first time he’d been kidnapped. Sam had just given him a weird look but backed off. 

After that, Bucky had suggested that Steve get some sleep.  

Steve didn’t want to sleep but he put his head back and closed his eyes anyway just to appease his friend. Though he resolutely stayed awake for the entire flight. 

When they got back to the compound, Steve managed to talk his way out of going to medical. There wasn’t any point, any serum would have left his body hours ago. Bruce didn’t look happy about it, but he was too busy with Tony to really be able to fight Steve on it. 

Steve headed straight to his quarters, locking the door securely behind him and moving quickly to the shower. His teammates had brought them clothes, so he had at least been able to be warm and dry on the trip back, but he had felt bad using Marianne’s bath to clean himself off properly. Now, he stripped his clothes off and stepped under the scorching spray of his shower. He immediately grabbed soap and a cloth and begin scrubbing himself head to toe. He felt dirty, telling himself that it was just from being in the forest for a night with the rain beating down on them. He didn’t want to think about anything else that had made him dirty. Or anyone he had made dirty. 

A sob tore through him. He dropped the washcloth and brought his hands to his face. What had they done? There was no coming back from it. How would he ever be able to face Tony, how would he be able to tell him? He thought of how nice it had been back at the little cottage, as the two of them were able to just talk and joke like they used to. That would all be gone now, especially once Tony found out Steve was keeping something from him. Again. Maybe it would be best to just never tell him?  

Steve immediately felt guilty. He should tell Tony, just get everything out in the open. Hopefully they would be able to move past it somehow. 

Resolved, Steve finished his shower and got out and got dressed. He saw he had a text from Bucky asking how he was doing. He send a quick reply letting Bucky know that he was okay and was going to go to sleep. It wasn’t a lie, Steve did need to get some sleep. But at the same time he just didn’t feel like seeing anyone right then.  

He collapsed onto his bed, exhaustion over taking him. In the morning, he promised himself, he would go talk to Tony. 

 

The next morning, just as he planned, he went looking for Tony. Except, Tony wasn’t around.     

“He had to go take care of some SI stuff,” Bruce told him at breakfast. “Why? What’s up?”  

“I just wanted to make sure he was doing okay,” Steve replied quickly. It was the truth, he was wondering how Tony was faring. 

Bruce nodded, “His toxicology report came back negative. Whatever that stuff was, it burned out really fast. His blood panels look fine, the aching and shakiness have mostly gone away. His wrists will take a while to heal, but there won’t be any lasting damage.”    

“That’s great,” Steve said. “I’m glad to hear it.” 

“How about you, how are you doing? Feeling any residual effects?” 

Steve shook his head. “Nope. I feel fine.” 

“Well, let me know if you experience any unusual symptoms. You can never be too careful with these crazy scientists experimenting on people with untested serums.” Bruce said, smiling ruefully. 

Steve chuckled, “I’ll keep that in mind.” 

After breakfast, Steve tried to go about his day as usual. He knew from experience that it was best to just get back into the routine after a trauma. Trying to ignore the little voice in his head telling him that he had never been through something quite like that before. 

He went through his normal training routines, ignoring the concerns looks he got from Sam and Nat when he seemed a little out of sorts. He shrugged it off and told them he was just a little tired still.  

All day he kept waiting to hear that Tony was back. Planning to go talk to him as soon as he was. Not knowing when that would be though, he felt on edge, worrying about the conversation they would have to have. 

By evening, it seemed clear that Tony wasn’t going to return that day. Steve tried to distract himself by playing video games with Sam and Bucky, but he just couldn’t concentrate. 

After about an hour Sam finally told him he should just go to bed.  

“I am fine,” Steve said, automatically.  

“Man, you are not fine. You just let Bucky take you out with a hand grenade.” 

Steve focused on the screen and noticed that indeed his character was dead on the ground. “Oops.” 

Bucky snickered. “Go easy on him Sammy. I’m sure he’s just missing his new sweetheart.” 

Steve sat up straight, feeling very alert all of the sudden. “What? Who? What do you mean?”   

Bucky laughed harder. “I’m talking about  _ta_ _petite_ _dame_ _._  She was ready to tuck you in her pocket so she could keep you forever.” 

Steve relaxed. “Ha ha, very funny.” He tossed his controller down on the couch. “I’m going to bed, I’ll see you two clowns in the morning.” 

 

_That night Steve dreamed of a hot mouth. Of hands holding him down as he begged for more. Then he broke free of his restraints and thrust into a hot, slick ass. It was Tony under him. Tony moaning with need as Steve pounded into him as hard as he could, not caring if he hurt him. They were back in the forest, rain pouring down around them. Steve needed to get Tony somewhere safe, but he couldn’t stop thrusting into him. The need to come overriding everything else._

_The other Avengers stood around them, seeing what Steve was doing to Tony, and looking disgusted._

_Still Steve couldn’t stop._

_Tony was bleeding from somewhere on his body, Steve couldn’t tell where. He still didn’t stop, he just kept pounding into Tony. He needed to come so bad._

Steve woke up, tangled in the sheets as he thrust his cock against the mattress. He wasn’t even fully aware of what he was doing, caught between the dream and reality. He just knew it felt good and he was desperate for completion. It took only a few seconds to get there. His hips working frantically to rub against the soft sheets. He came with a shout that was muffled by his pillow, hot cum creating a mess under him.  

As his heart rate slowed and he became aware of his surroundings, Steve realized, with horror, that he had just come to a dream of having sex with Tony.  

He scrambled off the bed as fast as he could, staring down at the mess he had made, unable to look away.  

Working quickly, he pulled the sheets off the bed and bundled them in the hamper.  

He then went to the shower, turned it on cold and stood under it until he was shivering.     

Afterwards, he hurriedly got dressed, grabbed the hamper and went down to the laundry room. It was still early and no one was around thankfully. Even though people were used to him doing his own laundry, he still didn’t want to run into anyone. 

He shoved the blankets and sheets into one of the industrial washers, poured the soap in and started it. 

He stood there watching the machine run. Logically, it would be fine to just leave the bedsheets here. The washing machine would clean them and no one would think it was odd that he was cleaning his sheets early in the morning. They would probably just figure he’d had a nightmare and had woken up in a cold sweat.  

He ended up staying down in the laundry room as the sheets were washed and dried, only leaving when he could take them with him. 

 

“Hey man, where were you?” Sam asked as soon as Steve walked into the common room later that morning. 

Steve froze in his tracks. “What do you mean?”  

“You didn’t meet us for running this morning,” Sam reminded him. 

“Yeah,” Bucky said. “If it’s only me out there laughing at Sam I just look like an asshole.” 

“You are an asshole,” Sam replied, helpfully. 

“Sorry,” Steve stammered. “I, I had a thing come up.” Hoping his friends wouldn’t press for details. They seemed to take his excuse in stride. One of the benefits of having been kidnapped just a few days ago. 

“You still up for some training later,” Bucky asked.     

“Sure, yeah, I’ll be there.” Steve assured them, trying his best to look at ease.  

Bucky gave him an odd look but didn’t press any further. “See you later then.”     

Bucky and Sam took off, explaining that they had agreed to help Maria train new recruits. 

Steve busied himself with making some breakfast. He was just sliding his eggs onto a plate when he heard two sets of footsteps heading towards him. A second later Rhodey and Tony came into the room. 

“You’d think getting kidnapped would get me out of a board meeting,” Tony was complaining. “Turns out after about the fourth time it happens you lose all sympathy points from Pepper.” 

“Maybe you should stop getting your ass kidnapped,” Rhodey said, slapping a sympathetic hand on Tony shoulder. 

Steve started shoveling his eggs into his mouth, telling himself it was just because he was really hungry. 

“This time was totally not my fault. It was Steve’s fault, right Steve?” Tony said looking over at Steve.  

Steve froze, fork halfway to his mouth, a sense of panic rising in him. “What? Why, why was it my fault?”  

“Because they were just after you,” Tony explained. “I was just along for the ride. A little eye candy for them.” 

Steve tried to swallow down his eggs, but his throat felt like it was twisted close. 

“Leave Steve out of this. The only person whose fault it is, is yours,” Rhodey said. “Pepper hasn’t shown you any sympathy since that time you got out of an R&D meeting by claiming there were robots attacking the city.” 

“Hey, there where robots attacking the city!” Tony protested. 

“Two,” Rhodey said, holding two fingers up in Tony’s face. “There were two robots attacking the city. And Hulk had them both smashed within five minutes. You spend the next three hours using it as an excuse. That is why Pepper doesn’t give you any sympathy anymore.”    

Tony looked down right indignant. “Hey, more robots could have shown up. How embarrassing would it have been if there hadn’t been any Avengers around to stop them.” 

“Back me up here Steve,” Rhodey said, coming over to stand next to him. 

“No,” Tony said, coming around to the other side of Steve. “Steve is going to back me up on this one, right buddy? He was there with me, he knows how harrowing the experience was.” 

“I, um,” Steve felt like there wasn’t enough air in the room anymore. 

Tony suddenly caught sight of Steve’s mug of coffee. “Is that the last of the coffee? You know the rule, empty the pot fill the pot. All hours of the day.” 

“You can have mine,” Steve said, pushing the mug over to Tony. “I have to get going anyway. Said I’d meet Sam and Buck.” He tried not to sound like he was making an excuse to leave the room as quickly as he could. It was just that he still hadn’t shaken the effects of the dream from last night. He just needed some time to get his head straight. “I’ll talk to you guys later.” 

He shoveled last of the eggs into his mouth and left the table still chewing.     

He went down to the gym, even though he knew Sam and Bucky weren’t going to be there. They were helping train the new recruits at wilderness survival and were supposed to be out in the woods until that afternoon. Fortunately, Nat and Clint were in the gym sparring. 

When Clint saw Steve, his face lit up. “Steve! Come take over for a while, I’m tired of getting my ass handed to me. 

Nat smirked. “It’s not my fault that all that farm living has made you soft.” 

Clint gasped in mock offense. “I’m telling Laura you said that.”    

“Laura is the one who said it to me.” 

Steve spent the rest of the morning sparring with Clint and Nat. They took turns fighting each other one-on-one and two-on-one. 

By the time lunch rolled around, Steve was feeling more clearheaded, having shaken the dream from the night before. Or at least he thought he had, until he saw Tony in the hallway. 

“There you are,” Tony called out as he approached him.  

Steve glanced around, not looking for a way out, just looking. The hallway had the usual foot traffic, but nobody Steve could use as an excuse to dismiss Tony. Not that he was going to.  

Tony stopped right in front of Steve, well into his personal space. That normally wasn’t unusual for Tony. He just had been keeping Steve at arm's length for the past few months.  

Steve had to will himself not to take a step back. 

“So, I’m sending Marianne a rosebush, it’s the one named after Julia Child. Bright yellow flowers, smells lovely, or at least that’s what Pepper told me.”  

“That’s nice Tony. That will be nice, I’m sure she’ll appreciate it.” Steve said, glancing around again. 

“And obviously I’m sending it with some gardeners to plant it,” Tony continued. “Not going to make a 90-year-old lady do all the work herself.” 

“Good idea.” 

“Well, I just thought you might like to know,” Tony said after a beat. “You know, let you sign the card or something.” 

Steve glanced around the hall again “Sure. I can do that.” He was trying not to look at Tony. Trying not to think about the way Tony’s hands felt when they touched him. Trying not to remember the way Tony felt when he was close and they were- Steve cleared his throat, “So if that’s all, I’ll just talk to you later.” 

“Hey,” Tony looked at him concerned. “Are you okay?” Tony reached out and placed his hand on Steve’s arm. “You seemed kind of out of it earlier.” 

Steve couldn’t help it, he flinched and pulled away from Tony, skirting along the wall to get around him. “I’m fine. Just busy. Talk to you later.” And with that Steve took off down the hall, not caring that he probably looked like he was fleeing from Tony.   

He avoided the common room where he knew he would just run into Tony again. Instead he went to the canteen where the staff usually ate and grabbed a premade sandwich, some chips and a drink and brought it back to his room to eat. 

As he sat there, hunched down in his chair, eating his food, he knew he hadn’t handled things well. He shouldn’t have run from Tony like that. He should just go find Tony and talk to him. 

Then Steve looked up at his bed, taking in the freshly cleaned sheets and remembered vividly the dream from the night before. Guilt swept through him. How could he have dreamed something like that? Wasn’t it bad enough what had happened when they were in that basement? He shouldn’t be dreaming about it. And certainly not enjoying the dream. 

He quickly finished his lunch, the food had little taste in his mouth and wasn’t that satisfying. But he didn’t feel like eating much more either. 

He sat in his room, trying to reason out what he should do next. He lost track of time, until he got a text from Sam. 

 _Where are you? Thought we were going to train_ _?_   

Steve looked it up at the clock and realized that it was well past three in the afternoon. He hadn’t realized how long he had been sitting in his room staring at his bed.  

He sent a quick text to Sam, telling him that he was on his way and sorry about the delay. Then he headed down to the gym to meet Sam and Bucky. 

Neither one of them commented on Steve’s lateness, nor how distracted he was during training. Sam was even able to land several easy hits on Steve. 

After only about an hour Buck called it quits 

“I think you might need some more rest,” Bucky said, sounding concerned. 

“I’m fine,” Steve insisted. 

“Yeah, you keep saying that,” Sam said, looking worriedly at Steve. “But you’re not acting like you’re fine. Look, it’s okay if you need a few days to recover.” 

“I said I’m fine,” Steve snapped. He immediately felt bad when Sam looked at him in surprise. “I’m sorry, I just didn’t sleep well last night.” 

“Hey man, it’s cool. It’s not like you don’t have something to be upset about,” Sam shrugged. 

Steve balked, thinking for a moment that Sam knew what had happened last night. But then he realized that Sam was just talking about the kidnapping. “It wasn’t that big a deal,” Steve said, not quite looking Sam in the eye 

“Obviously it was that big a deal,” Bucky said. “Otherwise you wouldn’t be acting this way.” 

“What way?” Steve asked, defensively. 

Sam and Bucky shared a look. 

“Tell you what,” Sam said. “Let’s get out of here. We’ll go into town and grab a bite to eat, sound good?” 

Steve sighed, releasing some of the tension he hadn’t realized he was holding onto. “Yeah, yeah that would be good.” 

Sam smiled, and clapped Steve on his shoulder. Steve was immediately reminded of the way Tony had touched him earlier, but this time he managed to not flinch away. 

“Come on,” Bucky said as he headed towards the gym exit. “Let’s go to that place that always gives Steve free food because the owner likes him.”    

Steve chuckled at his friend’s jab. “All right, but I’m not sharing the pie this time.” 

As they headed out, Steve resolved to try to not think about Tony or any of his problems while at dinner. 

 

When they got back that evening, Steve felt much better. There had been a small carnival in town and Sam, Steve, and Bucky had spent the evening winning all the carnival games and handing the stuffed animals out to random kids. The carnies had started giving them dirty looks, which only made the three of them laugh and win even more games. 

When they got back to the compound, Sam and Bucky bid Steve goodnight. As soon as Steve stepped into his room, and caught sight of his bed, the previous night’s dream came back. 

So instead of going to bed, Steve proceeded to tidy up his room, make a list of items he needed to buy from the store, made another list of things that were needed around the compound, and then made one more list of things he thought others might need in their own apartments. 

When he couldn’t find anything else to do in the small room, he changed into his workout clothes and headed down to the gym. He ran the track, worked with the heavy bags, and did strength training. 

Early the next morning he was waiting for Sam and Bucky at their usual place to start their morning run. Both of them looked relieved to see him there, though they tried to hide it. And when Bucky tried to set the pace to something easier than usual, Steve teased him about being a tired old man. 

Bucky had taken the challenge, of course, and they raced each other around the track. Passing Sam twice more than they usually did. 

“I hate both of you,” Sam gasped at the end. “Both of you were off my Christmas card list. And Kwanza!” 

Steve and Bucky laughed and helped Sam inside to get some water. 

At breakfast that morning, Steve tried not to look like he was waiting to see if Tony showed up or not. He also tried not to be relieved when Tony didn’t show.  

In fact, Steve didn’t see Tony all day. Not until dinner time rolled around. 

Clint had decided that since there were only a few of them at the compound that night, it was a perfect time to have a home-cooked meal together. By which he meant he had ordered lasagna from a local resturant. 

Natasha insisted that they at least make the salad themselves and had bought a wide variety of colorful vegetables to put in it. 

Steve was chopping carrots when Tony walked in. He was immediately aware of Tony’s presence and tried to focus on his task, hoping that Tony would keep his distance like he had been doing ever since Steve had come back from his exile in Wakanda.  

Instead, Steve got a repeat of the day before. Tony seem to be seeking him out for some reason. He came over and looked down to see what Steve was doing.      

“Hey, purple carrots, nice. Did you get them from the farmers market in town?” Tony asked Steve. 

“I, no it was Nat, she got them. You’ll have to ask her where from.” Steve said keeping his eyes down at his task of slicing the carrots into thin coins. 

He tensed as he felt Tony lean into his personal space and grab a piece of carrot. Tony was so close that he could hear him munching on the carrot. Could smell him. Steve felt a thrum of desire.  

“Yummy. Who made the lasagna?” 

“Rocco‘s,” Clint answered, laughing. 

Tony moved away from Steve, going over to the wine cabinet. “At least you went with a good restaurant,” he said as he pulled down a bottle of red. 

Steve looked up to see where Tony was in the room, and he caught sight of Nat watching him. There was a tiny wrinkle between her eyebrows that let Steve know she was worried. Steve just ignored it and went back to chopping carrots. 

At dinner, Steve sat next to Bucky, who just happened to be on the far end of the table from where Tony was sitting talking to Bruce. 

Rhodey had had to go to Washington for a meeting and Sam had left that afternoon to go visit his mom for the weekend. So it was just the six of them at the table. Clint and Nat were sitting near Bruce and there were several chairs between them and Bucky. Steve kept catching Nat looking at him quizzically. 

She wasn’t even trying to be subtle about it. 

Steve just ate quickly and then asked Bucky if he wanted to go play video games. Bucky agreed and wolfed down the rest of his meal.  

“Hold up,” Clint called. “There’s dessert too.” 

“We’ll take it to go,” Steve said. He grabbed two of the take out containers with tiramisu in them, also from Rocco’s restaurant, and hurried Bucky out of the room. Ignoring the confuse looks from the other Avengers, including Tony.     

Steve and Bucky stayed up until the wee hours of the morning playing Call of Duty. Finally, around 2 AM Bucky called it quits. Even after he was gone, Steve stayed up playing against a kid in China. He justified that he was working on his Mandarin.  

The next morning, Steve was once again waiting for Bucky to go on their morning run. 

 

Steve eventually had to sleep, but he put it off as long as he could. He hoped that if he just waited until early morning and got a few hours in, he wouldn’t dream. Except he did. 

_He is back in the chair and Tony is in his lap, fucking himself on Steve’s cock. Their moans filling the air._

_Tony is holding down Steve, kissing his neck, then bites down on his shoulder. Steve cries out in pleasure and begs Tony to do it again. Tony bites down again and the pain sends spikes of pleasure through Steve’s cock. He thrusts up faster and faster into Tony’s ass. Pleasure and pain making the perfect combination as he comes._

Steve woke up gasping from his orgasm. His boxers were sticky with cum. He staggered out of bed and headed immediately for the shower. He turned it on, full cold, stripping down and stepping under the frigid spray. He stayed there, trying to numb his body and his mind. But desire was still thrumming through his body. And not just a general desire for intimacy. It was desire for Tony. Steve couldn’t help think about how Tony had been so close the night before, and how under any other circumstances it would have been nice.  

Now, though. He shouldn’t be having these thoughts about Tony. It was wrong. Especially since Tony still didn’t know about what had happened, because Steve was such a coward. 

His cock was still hard. The single orgasm from the dream not enough to satisfy him. He turned the water to warm, since the cold wasn’t helping any way. Maybe the dreams were just an after effect of the serum he’d been given. He should go talk to Bruce about it, but then he’d have to explain everything to Bruce.  

Maybe he just needed to get the excess sexual energy out of his system. Then he would stop having these highly inappropriate dreams.  

He began to carefully stroke himself, closing his eyes and thinking about the pin-ups the men he served with always passed around. It had always worked in the past to get him excited. But instead of the flowery scent of perfume those images always brought to mind, his sense memory pulled up a darker, musky scent.  

Tony had been standing so close behind him the other night in the kitchen. He had been so close he could have easily rested his free hand on Steve’s back. And then, maybe, he could have slid his hand lower, down to Steve’s waist. No one had been standing behind them, Tony could have even caressed Steve’s buttocks.  

Steve gasped at the thrill of pleasure that idea invoked. His strokes speeding up as he thrust back as if he’d find a hand waiting there.  

What if Tony had leaned his body against Steve? What if he had pressed his hard cock against Steve’s ass? What would that feel like? Tony had sure enjoyed having Steve inside him. Would it feel good to have Tony inside him? 

Steve’s knees buckled with the intense pleasure the thought brought. He sank down to the shower stall floor, hand pumping furiously as he pictured Tony pulling down his pants and thrusting inside him.  

Steve came with a harsh shout. The water immediately washing away the evidence of his shame. A hollow feeling followed. He shouldn’t have done that. Not while thinking about Tony. Not while thinking about any man for that matter. It was one thing to have it happen in a dream, but there was no excuse for what had just happened.  

He stayed in the shower, sitting on the floor, letting the water wash over him in some sort of vain hope it would wash away his problems too.  

A pounding on the bathroom door jolted him out of his stupor.  

“Steve! What’s going on? You’ve been in the shower for almost a whole fucking hour!” 

It was Bucky. Steve heard a quiet, “Ease up, man”, that let him know Sam was with him.  

Steve stood up quickly and turned off the water.  

“Sorry,” Steve called back. “Didn’t realize. I’ll be out in a minute.  

He heard Bucky’s huff of annoyance as he stomped off, followed by Sam’s lighter foot falls.  

Steve dried off and wrapped himself in a towel before exiting the bathroom. He could tell that Sam and Bucky had left his bedroom and we’re out in his little living room and kitchen. But he still felt he needed the modesty.  

He quickly got dressed, noting it was well past the time he was supposed to meet for their morning run.  

There was the sound of Bucky forcefully digging through Steve’s fridge and cupboards, swearing the whole time, then the blender started up. It ran for a good five minutes, which meant Sam and Bucky were using the noise pollution to talk about Steve.  

When the blender finally turned off, Steve decided he couldn’t avoid them anymore.  

They were both standing at the kitchen counter when he walked out into the living area. Bucky was drinking a protein shake and staring down the fridge as if it had insulted his mother. Sam was drinking a glass of orange juice and trying to pretend like he probably hadn’t just told Bucky off.  

“How’s it going?” Sam asked, keeping his tone light.  

“Alright,” Steve replied warily. Sam had the look he got when he was going to nicely, but firmly, make you spill the beans.  

“Bucky made you some breakfast,” Sam gestured at a second protein shake sitting on the counter. The shake had been poured in rather sloppily and half of it looked to be spilled on the counter.  

“Thanks Buck,” Steve said, picking up the shake and taking a drink of it, ignoring the mess it was making on his hand.  

Bucky continued to glower at the fridge.  

“So,” Sam began, “an hour long shower. Were you out fighting swamp monsters without us again?” 

There was no point trying to shake Sam once he started his therapy mode, as Bucky called it. So Steve thought fast. “I, I had a nightmare,” which was true. “About being in the Arctic,” sort of true. He had thought, originally, that they were being held in the Arctic still. “And just, the cold. When we first escaped, before we got out of the cell, I thought I was going to have to get through the Arctic with no shoes and only some scrubs to keep us warm.” All very true. “I guess it brought back some memories.”  

Sam looked concerned but also supportive. “And the shower, you were trying to get warm?” 

Steve nodded. “Guess so.” Natasha had taught him way too much about lying. Give only as much information as you had too. Let the other person fill things in.  

“You should have told us.” Sam admonished lightly. “Let us help you.”  

Steve shrugged, looking down at his drippy glass. “Didn’t want to bother anyone.” 

Sam eyed Steve over his glass of orange juice. “Dude, we have literally jumped into fire for you before. Trust me when I say, this is not a bother.” 

Steve smiled, it was even a genuine one. “I know.” And he did know. He knew if he spilled everything to Sam and Bucky right now, they would listen. But he just couldn’t get the words out. So the lie would have to do so they’d stop worrying.  

Sam clapped him on the shoulder, returning the smile. Steve felt relieved. It had worked. They would stop asking him what was wrong all the time. Which meant Steve was less likely to give in and tell them.  

Then Steve glanced over at Bucky. Bucky was regarding him with narrowed eyes. Steve’s smile faltered. Bucky knew he was lying. Steve held his breath, waiting for Bucky to call him out on it. Except, Bucky didn’t say anything. He just took another long drink of his shake and went back to staring at the fridge.  

 

Over the next week, Steve tried his best to avoid Tony. At first it was hard since Tony still seemed to be seeking out Steve’s company. As the week progressed, however, he ran into Tony less and less often. Steve was equal parts relieved and disapointed. 

He also tried to avoid sleeping as much as possible. To avoid getting caught, he set up several alarms that got him out to his morning run on time and kept him from missing any other appointments. It seemed to be working too. He got less, ‘Are you okay?’ questions. And only Bucky had been giving him sideways looks for the last few days.  

Unfortunately, it eventually caught up with him.  

He had decided to hang out with Clint in the common room and watch a hockey game. Steve wasn’t a big fan of hockey, but the games always went late into the night. And Clint was a very enthusiastic and loud fan.  

Steve had settled down in one of the plush armchairs to watch the spectacle that was Clint watching the game.  

Clint yelled at the TV, cheered loudly, offered his opinions to Steve, and generally was as rowdy as he could be.  

Still, Steve’s eyes grew heavy and he kept dozing off. The sounds of the TV and Clint’s cheers kept him from sleeping too heavily. And even though he dreamed the dreams were heavily influenced by the sounds from the TV. At one point he even dreamed that he was riding a horse that was telling him about the best kind of lite beer to drink. 

When he opened his eyes next, a blanket had been drapped over him, and the TV had been turned down low. 

Bucky was sitting on the couch next to Clint, watching the game with him. Clint seemed to be trying to stay quieter, even covering his mouth with his hands at one point to keep in a curse. 

Steve was warm and sleepy, and dozed back off. 

_He is running through the forest. Something is chasing him. Something wants him. He runs as fast as he can, his lungs burning with the need for air. He can’t get away. He is going to get caught, they are going to find him. They  are going to find out. He slips and falls, rolling down a hill. He gets up trying to get away, but his legs aren’t working the way they should be. He hears the sound of a dart gun and feels the sting of a dart hit his back. Dozens more follow, sinking into his skin. He feels the burning of the serum entering his body. Not again. Please not again._

“Wake up sleeping beauty." 

Something small and hard hit Steve square in the forehead. He woke up with a yell and grabbed for the nearest thing he could find and threw it as hard as he could. 

There was a yell and the sound of something crashing.     

Steve looked around frantically. He was still in the common room, the blanket that had been draped over him was pooled at his feet and he was standing there gasping for air. Clint and Bucky were standing in front of him, wide eyed. 

Bucky was standing in front of Clint, his left arm raised in front of him. Around them were shards that had been the lamp that had been sitting on the table next to Steve’s chair. 

With sinking horror, Steve realized what must have happened. Clint must have been trying to wake him up, that was his voice Steve had heard. And as he usually did, he had probably lobbed something at Steve’s head to get him to wake up. The peanuts that were sitting on the table by the couch were a likely culprit. But in Steve’s panic from his dream, he had attacked Clint, throwing the lamp at him. The only thing that had saved him was Bucky’s quick thinking. And his metal arm. 

“I, I’m sorry,” Steve stammered. 

“It’s okay,” Clint started to say. 

“It is not okay,” Bucky said, sounding pissed. “What has been going on with you lately?” 

“N-nothing.” 

“Don’t give me that,” Bucky growled. “You’ve been off ever since we got you back from France.” 

“I’m fine,” Steve insisted, defensively 

“The fuck you are! You nearly took Clint’s head off with a fucking lamp!”     

“I didn’t mean-,” Steve started to say. 

Bucky cut him off. “And don’t think I don’t know about you not sleeping. It’s obvious to anybody who sees you for more than five fucking seconds!” 

Clint grabbed Bucky’s arm. “Ease up.” 

Bucky ignored him. “You gonna tell me what happened in France?” 

“Nothing happened.” 

“The hell it didn’t!” 

“Leave it Buck,” Steve warned, his voice going low with the threat. 

But Bucky wasn’t going to back down. “Either tell me what happened or I’ll drag it out of your sorry ass.”     

Clint pushed his way in between them. “Knock it off both of you!” He turned to Bucky, “Go walk it off.” Bucky scowled at Clint, clearly thinking about pushing past him to get to Steve. Then he abruptly turned and stomped out of the common room.  

Clint released a breath and then turn to Steve. “You need to get some rest.” 

“I’m fine.” 

Clint raised an eyebrow. “Why don’t you tell me you’re fine one more time and see if I actually believe it.” 

Steve just glared at him. 

Clint heaved a sigh. “I know you don’t want to talk to us about what happened, but you need to talk to somebody about it. All right?” 

Steve lowered his eyes and swallowed. He gave a quick nod, knowing Clint was right. 

Clint didn’t look like he much believed Steve, though. He placed a hand on Steve’s shoulder in a comforting way. “Maybe you should just talk to the person who went through it with you.” He suggested gently.  

Steve didn’t answer, he just continued to stare at the floor, hoping Clint would just leave. 

Clint sighed again. “Go get some rest.” He turned and walked out of the room, leaving Steve alone with his guilt.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't be too hard on Bucky for yelling at Steve, you need to remember that Bucky has his own issues to deal with. And it's always frustrating when someone you're trying to help just keeps pushing you away.  
> Chapter title still from "Telling Stories"  
> Next chapter will show some of what Tony thinks about what's going on. Surprise, surprise, he's also annoyed with Steve's behavior.  
> Comments and kudos are the best!


	4. Fiction In The Space Between You And Reality

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's where mentions of a date rape drug start. Anyone who is talking about it is either doing so as delicately as possible, or with professionalism and distaste.

Tony was in a bad mood. The kind of mood that shows on your face and generally makes people try to avoid you. Unfortunately, not if those people were Natasha and Clint. 

“You are positive that you don’t remember anything?” Natasha asked. Again.  

“Trust me it’s nothing but a blank space. We’ve even tried to retrieve the memories.” Tony said, gesturing over to where Bruce was sitting.  

Bruce spoke up. “It’s true, the drug seems to create a neurophysiological, chemical disruption in the brain's hippocampus.” 

Clint looked lost.  

“It’s the same thing that happens when you get black out drunk.” Tony supplied.  

“Ah.” Clint nodded knowingly. 

Bruce nodded, "Yes, basically the chemicals that record memories get blocked, so nothing gets recorded. Kind of like if the auto-save wasn't working on your computer. You can type out a whole essay, but it's not getting saved to the hard drive."

Natasha blew out a frustrated breath. “Well we need to do something. Steve can’t keep going like this.” 

“Here’s a novel idea,” Tony put in. “Maybe he could try telling us the truth. Just for the fun of it.” 

Natasha and Clint glared at him and even Bruce looked a touch reproachful.  

“Really? You’re judging me here? He’s the one who demands honesty and forthrightness from everyone else, but can’t be bothered to follow his own rules.” 

“This isn’t the same as it was with Barnes,” Clint said. “There’s something really wrong with him.” 

“Is it that his pants are on fire?” Tony quipped. 

Natasha ignored his comment. “He’s acting like he went through some sort of trauma. Not sleeping, snapping at everyone, lashing out. Avoiding the subject of the trauma.” 

“What do you mean avoiding the subject?” Tony asked, curious despite his anger. 

“He won’t talk to anyone about what happened in France.” Natasha explained. “Not even to Bucky or Sam. Which is telling in and of itself.” 

“Well I don’t know why you’re telling me this. It’s not like he’s going to talk to me about it. That would require him staying in the same room as me for more than a minute.” And now they had touched on what had Tony the most irked. 

When they have been stuck in those woods and even afterwards at Marianne’s house, Steve had talk to him, even joked with him, like they used to. It had made him feel, if only briefly, as if everything was going to be all right between them. 

So when they got back, Tony had decided to keep the momentum going by seeking out Steve’s company. Except, as soon as they come back Stateside, Steve’s attitude had abruptly changed. He began avoiding Tony like the plague. Even flinching at Tony’s touch. Quite frankly, it was pissing Tony off. “He obviously doesn’t want to talk about it. Not to me, not to you, not to anyone. So, let him. We all know how stubborn he can be.” 

Natasha crossed her arms. “Yes, we all know Tony, and we also all know how badly that can turn out.” She looked at him pointedly. “For everyone.” 

“So, what do you want me to do?” Tony demanded, leaning forward into Natasha’s space. “Want me to sit him down and have a little heart-to-heart? I’m sure that won’t end badly at all.” 

“Speaking of stubborn,” Clint murmured under his breath.  

“Hey, this is not my fault.”  

Bruce held up a calming hand. “We’re not saying it’s your fault, Tony.” 

“Oh really? Because you’re all standing here looking at me with your faces, set to disapproval mode, like it is my fault. I didn’t get us kidnapped, and I certainly didn’t tell Steve to lie to everyone.”  

Tony had had enough, he stood up before anyone could stop him, he was going to find someone who would be sympathetic to him.  

Natasha reached out to stop him. “Tony.” 

Tony pulled away. He didn’t want to hear the false reassurances that they weren’t judging him for Steve’s problems. “Just don’t.” 

 

He found sympathy in the form of Rhodey. “No, you’re right,” Rhodey said. “This isn’t your fault.” 

“Thank you,” Tony said.  

“But they’re right, too.” 

Tony glared at him. “I’m sorry, I thought you were team Iron Man.” 

Rhodey gave him a long suffering look. “I’m always on your team Tony,” he said. “And sometimes that means disagreeing with you and pointing out when you’re not seeing something. You know something’s wrong with Steve. I think you just don’t want to know what it is because then you might have to come to terms with the fact that it probably happened to you too.” 

Tony scoffed. “That’s not what’s going on here.” 

“Isn’t it?” 

Tony folded his arms defensively across his chest. “No, it isn’t.”    

“All right then. Let me ask you this, did you watch the footage of Steve losing it last night?” 

Tony scowled at his friend. “No.” 

Rhodey looked at him expectantly, like Tony’s answer had proved something.  

“Why would I need to watch it?” Tony asked, exasperated. “He had a nightmare and threw a lamp. It’s not like it’s the worst thing one of us has broken around here.” 

Rhodey sighed, grabbed his tablet off the table, opened up a video, then handed it over to Tony.  

“I don’t need to watch it,” Tony insisted, even as he took the tablet from Rhodey.  

“Just watch the damn footage, Tony.” 

“It’s not going to-,” Tony fell silent as he caught sight of Steve asleep in the video. He was in the largest loveseat in the common room, tucked under a blanket, but it was obvious he wasn’t resting peacefully. His brow was furrowed and he was grimacing. Barnes was watching him from where he was seated on the couch. His lips pressed together into a thin line as he looked at Steve in obvious concern. Clint wasn’t immediately visible in the footage, but appeared a second later, telling Barnes he was going to head off to bed. Clint scooped up a handful of peanuts, ate a few, then flung one at Steve’s head. The reaction was instantaneous. Steve woke with a strangled yell, grabbed the lamp, and launched it full force at Clint. In almost the same instant, Barnes was off the couch, putting himself between Clint and the projectile. The lamp shattered against Barnes’ metal arm, pieces catching in his hair as he ducked his head away from the debris.  

Steve looked horrified when he realized what he had done. Barnes looked pissed. Tony listened to the argument that erupted. After Barnes had left, and Clint said a few words to him, Steve was left alone in the common room. Tony watched as Steve’s face crumpled in abject misery. Steve sunk back down into the love seat, face in his hands, as his shoulders started shaking. 

“Shit.” Tony swore, as he turned off the footage as quickly as he could.  

Rhodey was watching him, a knowing look on his face. 

Tony stared Rhodey down for a few minutes before throwing his hands up in the air. “Fine, I’ll try reaching out to him again.”  

“Atta boy,” Rhodey said, smiling. “I knew you’d get there in the end.” 

“Though I don’t know why anyone thinks it will go any differently than the last dozen tries have gone.” Tony grumped. 

Rhodey shook his head with amused disbelief. “You really don’t get it, do you?”  

Tony scowled at him. “Get what?” 

“How much you mean to Steve.” 

Tony snorted. “Yeah, I mean a whole lot to him. He’s made that very clear.” 

“Oh, he has, you’ve just never noticed it, apparently. I mean he likes all the rest of us well enough. Hell, he’d even die for any of us. But with you it’s something different.” 

“What are you talking about?” 

Rhodey shrugged. “It’s hard to put into words, but you’ve always been special to him.” 

Tony balked. “Special? Are you kidding? Are you forgetting Siberia? Or maybe Berlin?” 

“No. But I think you forget all the times before that.” Rhodey pointed out. “And all the times after.” 

“You jealous?” Tony asked, trying to lighten the mood. The conversation was heading in a completely unforeseen direction.  

Rhodey chuckled. “Nah, that would be like being jealous of Pepper.” 

Tony nearly choked. “Why would you compare Steve to Pepper?” 

Rhodey shrugged. “I don’t know, just seems like the best comparison.” 

Tony shook his head. “No. No, it’s a horrible comparison. And you’re a horrible friend for making it.” 

Rhodey rolled his eyes. “Just go talk to him. I mean the guys throwing lamps at people’s heads. It’s time to intervene.” 

“In all fairness, I’ve wanted to throw lamps at Clint’s head too.” 

 

Tony knew that, sadly, Rhodey was right.  

So, the next day, instead of hiding in his workshop, Tony sat down in the common room with his tablet to get work done. Everyone eventually came to the common room, it was where the food was after all. And now that Steve’s fridge had in-explicitly stopped working and the Cantina was closed due to the staff all being sick at the same time, Steve had nowhere else to go eat. Unless he left the compound. However, Maria was keeping him constantly busy so he wouldn’t have the extra time to go get food (Maria had glared at Tony for a good ten seconds before giving in). And if Steve decided to order food to be delivered, the guys at the front gate were under explicit instructions to only deliver it to the common room and to make sure Steve didn’t intercept them on the way. Tony had also told Friday not to let Steve know that he was in the common room. 

And so, with the trap laid, he waited. 

He had been there for over an hour, seen every other Avenger come and go, but no Steve. It had been a dumb idea anyways. Steve wasn’t going to just suddenly open up to him because Tony was sitting here on the couch scowling at his tablet. Well, he was scowling now, he had been trying to look as approachable as possible at first. As time went on though, he was becoming more and more frustrated as Steve continued to allude him. And it might have been reasonable to assume that his attitude was part of the problem. Because when Friday announced that there was an incoming message from Peter Parker and Tony answered it, Peter was immediately apprehensive at the sight of Tony’s face. 

 _“Is this a bad time? I can call back later.”_  

Tony forced himself to breathe deeply and school his features into something more neutral. “No, now is fine. I was just trying to work a problem.” Which was not untrue. 

 _“Oh, okay.”_  Peter said, visibly brightening. _“So, hey, do you remember me telling you about the Defenders?”_

“Is that the group Danny Rand is in?” 

_“Yeah, him. Jessica Jones, who’s a private investigator and super strong. And there’s Luke Cage, he’s the Hero of Harlem. And, of course, Daredevil. Whose name I don’t actually know, he’s the one who wears a mask. Or any kind of costume at all. Jessica makes fun of him for it, especially the horns.”_

Tony held in a sigh at Peter’s rambling. “Peter? Did you call just tell me about the latest fashion trends among New York City heroes?” 

_“Oh no, actually I’m calling about a case we’ve been working on.”_

“We?” Tony asked, with a raised eyebrow. “Have you been slumming it?” 

Peter was immediately defensive. For some reason he was always worried that Tony was going to boot him from the Avengers. _“No. No, of course not. I wouldn’t. Actually, we were investigating separate things and collided. Well not literally collided. See I was going after a lead about this guy who had worked with Toomes. He’s known as the Tinkerer. He was the one responsible for making most of the weapons. And I heard that he was commissioned to make this new tranq gun that’s kind of like a machine gun that fires the darts out in rapid succession. I’m not even sure what you would do with that kind of thing. Stop a stampede of rhinos?”_

“Peter. Peter. Peter, honey? I do not actually have all day.” 

_“Oh yeah, sorry. So anyways, the Defenders were investigating this new drug that’s been causing problems. It’s actually a date rape drug.”_

Tony frowned not liking the sound of Peter being anywhere near something like that. “It’s something new?” 

_“Yeah, it’s been popping up at all the night clubs.”_

“And why were you at a nightclub?” 

Peter shook his head emphatically. _“Oh no, I wasn’t there.”_ Tony caught Peter looking guiltily at the door to his bedroom. Probably checking that his, unusually hot, Aunt wasn’t listening. _“We actually crossed paths when it turned out that the guy who commissioned the machine gun dart thing is the same guy who’s been distributing this new drug.”_

Well at least Peter wasn’t at nightclubs infested with a new date rape drug. “Okay, and why are you calling me about this? Seems like something more for the police.”  

 _“Well see, this drug- Oh hey Cap!”_  Peter called out. 

Tony was momentarily confused until he realized Peter was looking at something over Tony’s shoulder. Tony turned around, and sure enough there was Steve standing there, next to the fridge, like a deer in headlights. “Hi, hi Peter,” Steve stammered out. “How are you doing?”      

 _“I’m good,”_  Peter said brightly. The kid had a bit of hero worship for Steve. _“I was just telling Mr. Stark about how I’m working with the Defenders to stop this new drug on the streets.”_ Peter said, proudly. 

“That’s good, that’ll be really good.” Steve stood there awkwardly, like he wasn’t sure if he should stay or go.   

Tony was torn. On the one hand, the reason he’d been camped out in the common room was to corner Steve. On the other hand, Peter was involved in date rape drugs and nightclubs.  

Damn it all to hell and back. 

“Go on,” Tony said to Peter. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Steve relax and go about getting some food from the fridge. Turned out, that the way to get Steve to stay in the same room as him was to have Tony’s focus be completely on someone else. 

Peter was, thankfully, oblivious to any tension. _“Okay, so this drug well, it’s different from other ones because first it makes you really, like really, really turned on. To the point that you, you know, do it with anyone.”_  

Tony rolled his eyes. Peter was way too young for this kind of case. “You mean have sex?”  

Peter blushed. _“Yeah. The other problem is that it also makes you forget everything from the time you take it to when it leaves your system. The victims can’t recall anything that happened to them. Not even any fuzzy details.”_   

Suddenly, there was the horrible sound of breaking metal. Tony at first thought it was coming from Peter’s side of the conversation. But Peter just looked puzzled. _“What was that?”_

That’s when Tony realized it is coming from behind him. He turned around and saw Steve standing in the kitchen by the remains of the fridge. The handle to the door had been completely torn off in Steve’s hand. He was standing there looking dumb struck.  

“What the hell?” Tony demanded. 

Steve seemed to come back to himself and looked down at the mangled door handle. “I- I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to.” 

“There seems to be a lot of stuff you didn’t mean to do lately,” Tony grumbled. 

Somehow this made Steve look even more horrified. 

Tony scrubbed a hand over his face. “Friday order a new fridge.” 

 _“_ _Already on it_ _,_ _boss_ _."_  

Tony turned back to the conversation with Peter, knowing that he was going to have to deal with Steve next before there was any more property damage. “I still don't get why you’re contacting me about this?” 

_“Well see, Jessica tracked down someone who works with the scientist who created the drug. Turns out the scientist was actually trying to make some kind of drug that would work on enhanced people.”_

Tony sat up and leaned in towards the screen, his interest suddenly peeked. “What kind of drug?”           

Peter shrugged. _“I’m not sure. He just said that the scientist had tested it and it didn’t work the way it was supposed to. But it did work as an aphrodisiac. So, the scientist guy found this drug dealer guy here in New York, who paid him to start making the drug for distribution.”_

Tony could, almost literally, feel the puzzle pieces falling into place. “He was developing a drug for super soldiers?” Tony asked calmly.  

_“Yeah, well anyone enhanced I guess. But like I said, it didn’t work out like it was supposed to.”_

“Do you know what it was supposed to do?” Tony asked, as calm as the sky before a storm. 

 _“No, the guy Jessica talked to didn’t know.”_   

“Can you tell me what the drug looks like?” 

 _“Yeah, actually I have a sample.”_ Peter pulled out a small clear plastic bag, inside was a small plastic tube, the kind you can just rip the top off of. The tube was filled with a black liquid. _“Please don’t tell May that I have this.”_ Peter said a little desperately. _“I promised her I wouldn’t keep samples of dangerous stuff around anymore.”_

Tony stared at the black liquid. It could be a coincidence. After all it could be a completely different drug that was black and had been developed for to work on super soldiers and other enhanced people. One that didn’t work like it was supposed to and made people forget things.     

Sure. And maybe Steve decided to start destroying refrigerators in his spare time. 

Tony slowly turned back towards the kitchen, already knowing what he was going to see.  

Steve was nowhere in sight.    

Peter was saying something about Bruce testing the sample.  

“Yeah, yeah we’ll do that. Go ahead and send it,” Tony said. 

 _“So, is this something for the Avengers?”_  

Tony realized he was gripping the arms of his chair tightly. “I’m gonna have to get back to you on that. Stay out of nightclubs.” 

He signed off with Peter and just sat thinking for a while.  

He thought of a black liquid in a syringe being injected into Steve by the crazy scientist who had kidnapped them. The scientist who had been trying to develop a truth serum that would work on enhanced people. The one that he had tested on Steve and had been frustrated to realize it didn’t work. Except it had definitely done something to Steve.  

Tony remembered the way Steve had been sweating and trying desperately to get out of the chair he was strapped to. His pupils dilated wide. Breathing heavy.  

Son. Of. A. Bitch. 

“Friday where is Steve right now?” 

 _"Rogers just_ _left the compound_ _. He_   _was dressed in his_   _Captain_ _America uniform._   _He has_   _turned off his_   _tracker,_ _but_   _security cameras show him heading south towards the highway_ _.”_  

Tony ground his teeth together in frustration. He thought about going after him, but decided it would be better to do a little investigating himself first. “Tell Bruce to fire up the lab, we’ve got a sample we need to process.”    

   

* * *

 

Steve raced down the highway, heading for the city.  

When Peter had talked about a drug that caused uncontrollable sexual desire and memory loss, Steve had panicked, to the detriment of the fridge. At first, he thought that he was overreacting, then Peter started describing the scientist who was behind the drug, and Steve knew it was the same man from France. He had bolted out of the common room and headed to his own quarters where he grabbed his uniform and left as fast as he could.  

Tony was going to figure it out. Steve should’ve just told him in the first place. 

Lab coat guy must have known, somehow, what the drug had done to Steve and Tony. Maybe he had found the clothes Steve had thrown away before they fled. 

He probably should have just taken the opportunity to talk to Tony. Instead, the rising panic in Steve’s chest was just telling him that he needed to get to the scientist first. Needed to somehow control the information that got released. Then he could explain things to Tony on his own terms. 

He was breaking the speed limit on his motorcycle, but dressed in his full gear it was doubtful that any police officer would stop him. He made it to the city in record time and navigated to Queens.  

He parked his bike on the top level of a parking garage near Peter’s apartment. Then he waited. 

It didn’t take long before he caught sight of Spider-man, swinging across the roof tops, heading out on patrol. 

Steve was immediately up and moving, jumping from roof top to roof top. Keeping an even pace with Peter. 

Sure enough, Peter noticed him and circled back around, landing neatly next to Steve. 

“Cap! Hey! I wasn’t expecting anyone so soon. Mr. Stark hasn’t gotten back to me about the drug yet.” 

“Tony’s still running some tests.” It wasn’t an outright lie. Tony probably was running tests. “This does seem like something that the Avengers should help out with, so I came on ahead.” 

“Great.” Peter enthused. “So, actually I’m heading over to Danny Rand’s place right now. They’ve got some information about the guy making the drug.” 

“That sounds perfect. Lead the way.” 

Peter took off again and Steve ran after him. With any luck he could get this taken care of before Tony got involved. 

 

* * *

 

Tony stood in Bruce’s lab, stewing in his anger, as Bruce peered through his microscope at the sample of the drug Peter had sent him through one of his spider drones. 

“And you think this is the same stuff that was used on you and Steve?” Bruce asked. 

“From Peter’s description, and the way Steve totally freaked out, I’m gonna go with yes.” 

“And Steve left?” 

“Like a bat out of hell.” Because, apparently, the idea of having had sex with Tony was so awful that Steve wanted to run away. Cause that was what most likely happened. They had both been injected with that stuff after all. 

“Well, it definitely could be the same stuff. I’ll have to run some more tests, especially since we didn’t have a sample of the original serum you got injected with.” 

“It might have been nice if someone had told us that it was really a sex drug instead of a truth serum that didn’t work.” Tony deadpanned. 

Bruce regarded Tony with the air of someone who was used to putting up with his temper tantrums. “I think you’re taking this the wrong way.” 

“Oh really, so you’re saying Steve  _didn’t_  withhold information from us?” 

“Well, No.” 

“And he didn’t outright lie about what really happened when he and I got kidnapped?” 

“I’m saying,” Bruce broke in, “we don’t have the whole story.” 

“I’ve got enough of it.” Tony groused. 

“Really?” Bruce asked, sarcastically. “So, you remember what happened?” 

“I don’t need to remember it. I can make a very educated guess. We probably helped each other get off and now he’s having a gay freak out about it.” Tony sneered. 

Bruce took his glasses off and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Maybe. Maybe, that’s what happened. But maybe you should just go a little easy on the guy. After all, he’s got a more conservative view of sex than you do.” 

Tony scoffed, “Or he just can’t stomach the thought of having been with me.” Okay, he hadn’t meant to say that out loud. 

Bruce looked at him questioningly, “Steve would never think that. You mean too much to him.” 

“Why does everyone keep saying that?” Tony demanded, angrily.  

“Cause it’s true.” Bruce said, with a shrug. 

“Can we please get back to hunting down the mad scientist responsible for making sex pollen?” 

“Wait, is it airborne?” Bruce looked slightly alarmed. “I thought you had to be injected with it or ingest it?” 

“No, I was just making a reference to- you know what, never mind. Can we track the guy down or not?” 

“Oh, yes. Not through the drug. Like I said, I need to run more tests. However, I can tell you where he’s getting his supplies from.” Bruce held up the small plastic vial the drug had come in. “This is from a guy here in the city who sells medical supplies on the black market.” 

“How do you know that?” 

Bruce shrugged. “Because I used to have to buy medical supplies on the black market. Hang on, let me pull up his current client list.” 

“What do you mean pull it up? Do you just have it saved on your desktop?”  

Bruce turned to his computer.  

“Seriously, it’s on your desktop?” 

Bruce tapped away at the keyboard. “I’ve always kept track of the people who I have done business with in the past mostly to make sure that the government wasn’t nosing around. Plus, you never know when some crazy scientist is going to invent a sex drug. Okay, here it is. Yes, he’s definitely been supplying him. My guy sold one hundred vials and the machine to fill them last week. He then sold another five hundred just yesterday, delivered to the same address.” Bruce pointed to the screen where an address in Hell’s Kitchen was listed.  

Tony put on his glasses to let Friday record the address.  

“Should I let the others know?” Bruce asked, sounding like he wanted the answer to be yes, but knew Tony better than that. 

“I think Steve and I need to have a little heart to heart first,” Tony said. 

Bruce looked resigned. “Just remember what I said, okay?” 

“Fine. I’ll try to hug it out first. Happy?” 

“Not really.” 

“Well, neither am I.” Tony shot back as he left the lab to go get geared up. No matter what his reasoning was, Steve had some explaining to do. 

 

* * *

 

Steve followed Peter to a dojo. 

“This is where Danny Rand lives,” Peter explained as he knocked on the door. “It’s actually his girlfriend’s place. She’s the teacher here.”  

The door was answered by a pretty Asian woman. Her eyes went wide when she caught sight of Steve. 

“Hey Colleen,” Peter said cheerfully. “Is Danny here?” 

Colleen eyed Steve, “Um, yeah. I don’t think he knew you were bringing a friend, though.” 

“Yeah, it was kind of a last-minute thing,” Peter explained. 

Steve held out his hand. “Hi, I’m Steve Rogers.” 

Colleen shook his hand, still looking a little thrown. “Yeah, I know who you are. Come on in.” She opened the door wider to allow them to come in. “Danny is going to flip out.” The way she said it let Steve know it was going to be the good kind of flipping out, not the bad kind. 

Colleen lead them into a large room with a wooden floor. “Danny, you’ll never guess who Spider-man brought with him.” 

“Who?” In the room, Danny Rand was sitting cross-legged on the floor and looked up as Colleen led Steve and Peter into the room. Danny did a double take, then jumped up and grabbed Steve’s hand, shaking it vigorously. 

“Captain America! Wow, it’s such a great honor to meet you,” Danny gushed.  

A snort caused Steve to look over at the other occupants of the room. Jessica Jones was slumped down in a chair with a bottle of whiskey in her hand. Luke Cage was sitting nearby, arms crossed over his chest. Both of them looked unimpressed to see Steve. Daredevil was standing in a corner of the room, it was hard to tell what he thought of Steve’s appearance, since the top half of his face was covered with his mask. 

“Yay, we’re saved,” Jessica snarked.  

“Jess, be nice,” Danny admonished. 

“Oh, come on, it’s bad enough we have a twelve-year-old helping us.” 

“I’m sixteen,” Peter protested.  

“But now we need Captain Spangly-Pants help to?”  

“I’m not trying to invade your turf,” Steve assured her. “I just want to help get this drug off the streets.” 

“And why do you suddenly care about this drug?” Luke asked, also coming off hostile. “It’s not like there haven’t been other drugs that need to be gotten off the streets before.” 

“This one’s personal,” Steve said. 

“Yeah, we’re going to need better than that,” Jessica said, dryly.  

Steve pursed his lips, trying to think of what he could say that would convince them. It was his fault the drug was out there. If he had told the truth from the beginning they could’ve gone after the scientist. They had looked into it, trying to track the guy down but there had been no trace. Maybe if they had known what the scientist had actually created they would have put more effort into it. “I have encountered the man making the drug before. He got away. I intend to rectify that.” Steve caught Daredevil tilting his head to the side in an odd way, like he had heard something surprising, but he didn’t say anything so Steve dismissed it. 

Luke looked mollified. Jessica just shrugged. “Whatever.” And took another drink of whiskey. 

“So, um,” Peter started, uncomfortably. “I sent that sample of the drug to Mr. Stark. Haven’t heard anything back yet.” 

“We have information on the drug dealer,” Danny said. “The problem is, he moves around a lot. Doesn’t keep his headquarters in one location.” 

“I’ve got it narrowed down to three different spots,” Luke said. “We can split up and check them out.” 

“Do you have any news on the man who created the drug?” Steve asked. 

Daredevil spoke up, “I’ve got a source that puts him in an abandoned factory in Hell’s Kitchen.” 

“We’ll go after the scientist first, then.” Steve said. 

“Um, you don’t get to call the shots here,” Jessica pointed out. 

“It makes sense to go after him first.” Steve explained. “We know his location. And if we can take out the guy making the drugs, the drug dealer’s supply will dry up. But if we leave the scientist for last, he may just move on and find a new dealer to work with.” 

“Makes sense to me,” Peter said. 

Jessica rolled her eyes.  

“I agree with the Captain,” Daredevil said. “We also might get the location of the dealer from the scientist making the drug.” 

Jessica didn’t look happy about it but they all agreed they would head out to the warehouse where the scientist was working. Steve would take this guy down and get rid of him once and for all, then he could worry about fixing things with Tony. 

He wondered if Tony had figured everything out yet. If there have been clues in the drug that Bruce could piece together. Except how would he know exactly what had happened? And how could he know that Steve hadn’t been able to stop thinking about it. That Steve was dreaming about it. Dreaming about having Tony like that, and how badly he wanted it to happen again. 

He shoved those thoughts away. He would deal with the scientist first and get the drug off the street. Then he would fix things with Tony.     

 

* * *

 

Tony approached the old warehouse and scanned it.  

 _“I’m not seeing anyone around,”_ Friday reported.  _“Or any sign of a lab.”_  

“Last time we thought there was nothing around,” Tony said, “turned out there was a lot of some things around. This guy is smart, he knows how to combat your scans.” 

 _“Guess you_ _better step up your game then_ _,”_ Friday sassed back. 

Tony landed on the roof of a nearby building that had several smokestacks on it to give himself some visual cover as he continued to scan the area. “He has to be projecting some sort of false image for the scanners,” Tony mused aloud. “Let’s try something.” Tony directed the scans to a nearby shop. It was a little bodega around the corner. The scan showed a few people roaming around the store and the owner sitting at the front watching TV. Tony switched back to scanning the warehouse as fast as he could. 

“There, that was it.”  

There had been a slight blip when he’d spun back to the warehouse. Normally he would’ve chalked it up to the fast movement, but since he had been looking for it he recognized it as the momentary interference of another signal overlaying his own.  

“Can you get around it?” he asked Friday. 

 _“I already have."_  

The readings from the warehouse changed showing one heat signature inside on the upper level.  

“That’s where the lab is,” Tony said, seeing the readout of all the equipment that was running inside the warehouse and how much energy the warehouse was using 

 _"I found something else,_ _too.”_  Friday said and showed a new readout on the HUD. It was the tracker from Peter suit showing he was just outside the warehouse on the opposite side from where Tony was.  

“Bring up his visual, let me see what he’s seeing.”   

In the next instant Tony could see that Peter was looking at two other people, one woman and a guy who was doing a very good impression of a mack truck. Then Peter turned his head and there was Steve. 

“Son of a bitch,” Tony cursed. “So that’s where he went.” 

Steve was talking to the others, trying to get them organized. It wasn’t going so well. Tony caught sight of Daredevil and Danny Rand, who were listening to Steve. However, the other two, who must be Jones and Cage, looked mutinous. 

“Are they going to run into any security?” Tony asked Friday. 

Cage got fed up with Steve’s leadership attempts and abruptly broke down the door.  

“Never mind, too late now.” 

 _"Boss, I’m detecting a large data transmission from inside the warehouse_ _._   _L_ _ooks like he’s trying to upload everything to the cloud."_

“Intercept and grab it all,” Tony ordered, knowing Friday probably already started to do just that. “We’ll sort through it all later.” 

 _“_ _I am also detecting several countermeasures being deployed against them_ _._   _D_ _isabl_ _ing_ _now._ _”_  

“All right, let’s go join the party.” Tony went in through a large broken window. There were alarms blaring throughout the building, making it hard to hear much. He was still able to see everything going on from Peter’s point of view and he watched as the scientist tried to get away but was intercepted by Daredevil. The scientist had a tranquilizer gun and tried to fire several darts at Daredevil, but he just flipped out of the way. Peter webbed up the gun and the scientist’s hands at the same time. It was all over very quickly. This guy was obviously counting on his tech to keep him safe and didn’t have anyone else there to protect him. 

From the corner of Peter’s vision, Tony saw Steve approach the scientists. The scientist immediately turned to Steve. 

“You’re going to let me go,” he said, sounding very confident. 

Tony was now close enough that he could see the Defenders, Peter and Steve gathered around the guy.  Steve’s back was to him, so he only saw Steve’s look of righteous condemnation from Peter’s point of view.  

“Why would I do that?” Steve asked, his voice hard and cold.  

The scientist smirked. “Because I’ve just uploaded all my data and saved it somewhere where you’ll never find it.” 

“I’m sure you’ll tell us eventually,” Steve assured him. 

“Maybe,” the scientist conceded, “but not before the video I have of you and Tony Stark is released.”  

Tony pulled up short. Had he heard that right?  

Through his display he could see Steve’s face go from stern to horrified. “Video?” he croaked out. 

The scientist laughed. “Oh yes, I assure, you I did not mean to get something like  _that_  on video. I was only recording for the purposes of being able to study the results in greater detail later. And trust me Captain, it is in great detail.” 

Steve had gone pale. He must know what the scientist meant. Whatever was on that video had to be what Steve had been keeping from Tony for the past few weeks. Memories of the bunker in Siberia surfaced with a vengeance. 

“Are you fucking kidding me?!” Tony announce to the room, causing everyone to turn and look at him in surprise. 

 

* * *

 

Steve felt his insides turn to ice at the sight of Tony hovering above them.  

“I have to find out about something that concerns me, from another fucking video? What’s on this one Steve?” Tony railed.  

Steve couldn’t make his mouth work. A million thoughts flew through his head about how he could explain this to Tony, how he could fix everything, right here and now. But none of it would come out. Around him the Defenders were looking at him questioningly, except Daredevil, who was frowning and doing his head cocked thing.

Tony’s helmet receded back into the suit and Steve could now see how furious he was. “I am so sick of how you think you can just keep all these secrets because you’re Captain fucking America. And the only way anyone finds out the truth, is through some security footage that you didn’t know existed.” 

Steve was finally able to find his voice, but instead of saying ‘I didn’t know how to tell you,’ all that came out was, “I didn’t-” before his voice failed him again. 

“You didn’t?” Tony sneered. He landed and advanced on Steve. “Didn’t what? You didn’t think it was important? You didn’t think I’d ever find out?” 

Steve took a step back. “No, that’s not it.” 

“Would you two mind having a lover’s quarrel some other time?” Jessica asked. “We’re kind of in the middle of something.” She gestured to the scientist on the floor. 

Tony turned to her. “And do you know what you’re in the middle of?” He asked. “Do you know why Captain I’m-So-Great is here with you right now? Or were you all too busy hero worshiping him to realize he was playing you.” Tony turned back to Steve. “Just like he plays everyone.” 

Steve could feel Peter and the others looking at him, but he could only stare at Tony, desperately trying to think of some way to make Tony understand. 

Tony went on. “He’s here because he’s trying to make sure that he doesn’t get caught in his lies just like he did last time.” 

Steve’s heart clenched in his chest. “That’s not, that’s not why,” Steve protested. At least he tried to, Tony just ignored him.  

“Tell me Steve, why couldn’t you just tell me that we had both been injected with a sex drug?” 

Steve couldn’t breathe. The warehouse and everyone around them faded to the background. There was nothing but Tony. Tony who was furious with him. 

“What was the worst part for you? Was it that you had to have sex with a guy? Or that you had to do it with me?” Tony snarled. 

Steve shook his head. How could Tony think that? Especially when the opposite was true.   

Lab coat guy was saying something about releasing the video. Tony cut him off. 

“You’re not releasing anything. I already stopped your upload and grabbed all your data. You’ve got nothing. Especially now.” Steve jumped back when several small missiles popped up out of Tony’s suit, sure that they were aimed for him. Instead the missiles went straight for the lab, blowing everything up. 

Lab coat guy cried out in despair.  

“Shit,” Jessica swore, sounding impressed. 

“I’m sorry.” Steve was finally able to get out.  

“You’re sorry?! Sorry for what Steve? For getting caught again?” 

“No. I-” 

“You know what I’m done.” Tony said jabbing an armored finger at Steve. “I’m done with you and your bullshit. I’m done with your self-righteous attitude. I never want to see your face again. Ever!” Tony’s helmet formed back around his head and he took off without another word.  

Steve was left standing there, unsure what to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now you know why you can't remember things when you get black out drunk. The moral of the story? Don't read my fics if you don't want to learn random facts. :D  
> Chapter title is still from the song Telling Stories (I really love Tracy Chapman, like, a lot). I chose that line to show that neither Tony nor Steve have the whole Story, but both think they do. Don't worry, they're eventually going to have to have a talk. Or a screaming match. We'll see how it goes.  
> My love language is Positive Affirmation, so leave kudos and comments.


	5. Leave the Pity and the Blame For the Ones Who Do Not Speak

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you started reading this story back in September of 2018, please be aware that I have made some modifications to the story in the previous chapters. Nothing major, just added a few things and filled in some plot. If you don't want to reread you won't be lost or anything. For a more in-depth explanation, please see the notes at the end of the chapter.
> 
> Also, more mentions of a date rape drug in this chapter. And a whole lotta angst.

Steve didn’t know how long he stayed there before Peter approached him, gently touching his arm. “Um, are you okay?” 

The other Defenders were standing as far away from him as they could get. Maybe trying to give him his space. 

“I’m fine Peter,” Steve said, his voice sounding as dead as he felt. “I’m sorry about all this.” Before Peter could reply, Steve turned and walked out of the warehouse. 

He didn’t get very far. He found an alley that was deserted except for the rats. He sat down against one of the walls, pulling his knees up to his chest, letting his shield fall down to the street with a clang, he crossed his arms over his knees and rested his head down. And just stayed there.  

An hour passed. There was some foot traffic in the area, mostly people up to no good. Most of them had the common sense to ignore Steve. Until a group of gang members saw him and came over to harass him.  

“Check it out guys,” one of them called out. “It’s good ol’ Captain America.” The man mocked. “You here to tell us all to be good boys?” 

The rest of the group laughed scornfully and started calling out their own jibes at Steve. It was clear from their tone that they thought they had just found somebody dressed like Captain America. 

Steve heard them getting closer, probably feeling really confident in their numbers.  

The first guy spoke again. “Check out that shield. Always wanted one of those.”  

Steve sensed the guy reaching out for his shield. And Steve just wasn’t in the mood. He jerked his head up and leveled a look at the group that clearly stated just how much he did not want company right now. And exactly how unwise it was for them to stick around.  

The guy closest to him jumped back, pulling his outstretched hand back as if he’d opened a basket only to discover a cobra hiding inside it. “Oh Shit! Shit!” And he turned tail and ran. The rest of his group hurrying out of the alley behind him.  

Steve heard a chuckle from above him. He looked up and there was Daredevil, perched on a fire escape on the building next to him. “I’ll have you know I was going to intervene,” Daredevil said, smiling. “But I didn’t realize that a scowl from Captain America could send a bunch of street punks running like that.” 

Steve couldn’t help smirking. “I’ve spent years perfecting it.” 

Daredevil jumped down from his perch, landing neatly in front of Steve. “We’ve taking care of the scientist. A Dr. Nestor Carmike. Peter called a woman named Maria Hill, she came and took him. We figured we shouldn’t send him to a regular jail. Not with his story. Ms. Hill promised the utmost discretion and some solitary confinement.” 

Steve hadn’t even considered that. “Thank you.” He croaked out. 

“Do you need somewhere to stay?” Daredevil asked, head tilted oddly again. “It’s going to start raining in just under an hour.” 

Steve did need somewhere to stay since he wasn’t going to be welcomed back at the Upstate facility. Steve looked around the alley, as if a place to stay would magically appear if he searched hard enough. Though, he supposed, one already had. Steve sighed and pulled himself to his feet and picked up his shield. “Yeah, sure. Thanks.” 

“My place isn’t too far.” Daredevil said, before launching himself back up the fire escape.  

Steve followed him across a few rooftops and down a balcony where Daredevil opened a window and climbed inside. Steve followed him inside to a large apartment. 

“Let me get the lights,” Daredevil said, crossing the room quickly despite the dark. He flip a switch and several lights turned on, dimly lighting the apartment. The apartment was sparsely furnished with no TV that Steve could see or any art work or nick knacks of any kind. And it was extremely tidy. Steve had a feeling nothing was ever out of place. 

Daredevil turn back to Steve. He removed his cowl and held a hand out. “Matt Murdock.” 

Steve accepted the offered hand out of politeness but he was staring at Matt’s eyes. Matt was looking in his general direction, but his eyes weren’t tracking him. Also, the name Matt Murdock sounded familiar and Steve was trying to remember where he had heard it while trying to figure out the eye thing at the same time.  

Matt smiled. “And yes, I am blind.” 

That’s when it clicked. “You’re the blind lawyer from Hell’s Kitchen,” Steve remembered, “the one who helped take down Wilson Fisk.” 

“That’s my day job,” Matt said. 

“That was very impressive. Not many people would have had the guts to do what you and your law partner did. Though it helps when you have powers.” 

Matt shook his head. “I don’t have any powers.” 

Steve couldn’t help raising an eyebrow at that statement. “You’re a blind man that goes out at night and fights bad guys. How would you be able to do that if you weren’t enhanced?” 

“When I lost my sight, the rest of my senses were sort of expanded to compensate. I essentially ‘see’ just in a different way than everyone else.” 

“Really? Can you ’see’ the dubious look on my face?” 

Matt laughed. “Not as such, but I can tell you’ve tilted your head down slightly at the same time as you dropped your shoulders. And your tone is definitely saying you don’t believe me.” 

“So, is it the same as if you weren’t blind at all?” Steve wondered. He wasn’t buying the whole, not enhanced thing, Matt was pushing. He remembered reading about Murdock’s accident when he was younger. The toxic spill that had stolen his sight. Steve had a feeling the chemicals he was exposed to had something to do with Matt’s abilities. 

“Not quite,” Matt shrugged. “I’ve adapted so much over the years that it feels just like being able to see. But there are a lot of things I still miss out on. Like, I can’t tell what color your uniform is. I assume it’s red, white, and blue, but I have no way of knowing unless someone tells me.” 

Steve looked down at his uniform. It was still fairly new. Tony had had it made for him when he got back to replace Steve’s worn out one. Tony had made a scathing remark about how Steve had pulled the star off his uniform, how it was so dirty it was almost black, and how Steve should take better care of his stuff. Yet, he still made Steve a new one. 

Steve felt a lump in his throat and was grateful Murdock couldn’t really see his face. 

Then Matt shifted uncomfortably. “I can also hear people’s heart beats. It allows me to tell when they’re happy, excited, angry,” Matt paused, “lying.” 

Steve’s head shot up. “You knew I was lying earlier? Why did you allow me to come along then?” 

“I could tell parts of what you were saying were true, and that you did honestly want to get this guy.” Matt explained. “And I figured if anyone was allowed to withhold some information, it was Captain America. And, it annoyed Jess,” Matt added with a smirk. 

Steve shook his head. “You’re wrong. I didn’t have an excuse for withholding what happened.” Steve swallowed against the tight feeling that was growing in his chest at the subject.  

Matt frowned. “From what I understand you were both given the drug? And Stark doesn’t remember, same as the other victims?” 

Steve nodded.  

Matt went on, “And you do remember it, correct? Probably because of your Super Soldier physiology.” 

Steve closed his eyes and worked to control his breathing. “I don’t really want-” 

“I’m assuming Dr. Carmike had some way of restraining you.” 

“I, what, yes. He had me in a chair with electromagnetic restraints. I couldn’t break out of it.” Steve winched at the slightly pleading sound of his words. 

Matt nodded as if he understood, which he probably did. “And Stark? Was he also restrained?’ 

“Yes. Just handcuffs. He was cuffed to a thing in the floor.” The sight of Tony wrestling with the handcuffs came unbidden to Steve’s mind. “He was able to get free though.” 

“Before or after you were both given the drug?” Matt asked. 

“After. It was, he was sweating from it, the drug. And he was, he got frantic, was pulling at the cuffs, making himself bleed. Must have made his hands slippery.” Steve could see it. Tony bleeding as he came at Steve. And Steve hadn’t cared, he’d just wanted Tony. Steve was no longer looking at Matt. He was looking down at the floor. He felt like he couldn’t get enough air into his lungs. 

“And at what point did you get free?” 

“It was after. After we,” Steve took a shaky breath. Why were they talking about this again? 

“So up until that point, you had no control over the situation?” Matt asked in such a way that it almost sounded more like a statement. “Including the timeframe in which you and Tony Stark had sex.” 

Steve suddenly felt angry. “Why are we even-? What is the point of this?” 

Matt didn’t look fazed by Steve’s anger. “The point is to establish if you had an excuse to withhold information about what really happened when you were abducted.”  

“I don’t!” 

“So, you never even tried to tell Mr. Stark about what happened?”  

Steve felt like he had lost control of the conversation at some point. “I, yes, I tried.” 

“And?” 

“I, it was not a good, I couldn’t, how could-” Steve’s throat was closing up. He couldn’t breathe. 

“Captain Rogers.” Murdock’s voice was strong and firm. “I want you to tell me five things that you can see in the room that are made of metal.” 

“What?” Steve gasped out. 

“Five things, now.” Matt demanded. 

Steve glanced around. “A clock, a frying pan, your front door, a set of sai, and a toaster. What does that have to do with anything?” 

“You were having a panic attack,” Matt explained. “You also had one when Stark showed up in the warehouse. I imagine you’ve been having them on and off since the abduction.” 

Steve opened his mouth to protest, but Matt just plowed on. 

“You’ve probably been feeling overly anxious, having a hard time concentrating. Irritable with trouble sleeping as well. Extreme feelings of guilt that are not rational.” 

Steve closed his mouth.  

“These are all common symptoms victims experience after an assault, especially a sexual assault.” Matt explained. 

Steve felt his anger return. “I’m not- I wasn’t sexually assaulted!”   

Matt raised his hands in a calming gesture. “Think about it. You were abducted and restrained. Then given a drug that caused you to have sex you would not otherwise have engaged in and could not give consent to.” 

“Tony was drugged too.” 

Matt gave a firm nod. “Yes, he was a victim in this as well. And if he could remember what happened, he would probably be going through the same things you are.”  

Steve shook his head, trying to clear the confusion he was feeling. 

“So, to conclude,” Matt said. “To the question of whether or not you had an excuse to withhold information, I’d categorially say you did. Your panic attacks and overall behavior are pointing to signs that you went through something traumatic. And, as is often the case, people who have gone through trauma, have a hard time talking about it. Taking months or years to open up about it is not uncommon.”   

Steve just stared at Matt, trying to process everything. “I’m not sure Tony will see it that way.” He finally said. 

“I’d be happy to present your case for you,” Matt said with an understanding smile. “And if all else fails, you can try almost dying. People tend to forgive you for a lot when that happens.” 

Steve huffed out a humorless laugh. “We’ll call that plan B.” 

“Well you’re welcome to crash here in the meantime,” Matt said. “I’m told I have an extremely comfortable couch. And it’s even recently been checked for bloodstains.” 

“Thanks,” Steve said. “I appreciate it.” 

Matt wished him goodnight and went into his bedroom, shutting the door behind him.  

Steve rested his shield carefully against the couch. He took off his helmet and stripped off the top half of his uniform, leaving only the undershirt on. He took his boots off but decided to leave his pants on. He felt uncomfortable just being in his undershorts and shirt. He thought back to being trapped in that chair. That’s all he’d been wearing then too and he didn’t like the reminder.  

And that only reminded him of what Matt had said. Which couldn’t be true. Steve had fought in a war. Some stupid kidnapping wasn’t going to throw him that much. Except, he had been really out of sorts since they got back, culminating into throwing a lamp at Clint.  

And that brought up the memory of Bucky yelling at him. Bucky tended to get agitated when others were having a rough time. He was definitely not the person you went to to talk things through with. Sam had once told Steve that Bucky just had too much of his own trauma to deal with anyone else's. No, Bucky was the guy you went drinking with to try and forget about your problems. Which Steve really wished he could do. He kind of envied Tony for not being able to remember any of it.  

Steve laid down on the couch. At least they had been able to apprehend Dr. Carmike and, thanks to Tony, his lab was destroyed and all the data kept from being lost. 

Steve suddenly bolted up on the couch. He’d had a horrible thought. Tony had taken all of Dr, Carmike’s data. Including the video.  

 

* * *

 

Tony flew back to the Upstate facility in a rage. He couldn’t believe Steve. After everything that they had gone through. After the Accords and Barnes. Steve had gone and done the exact same thing all over again. And the worst part was, it wasn’t even something that was that big of a deal. So, they had had sex. Who cared? The list of people Tony had had sex with was so long he would be hard pressed to give a rough number even.  

And it probably hadn’t even been full on sex. Probably was just a mutual hand job or something.   

Upon getting back to the facility, he went straight to his workshop, locked the door and blacked out the windows. He was not in the mood for anyone coming in to tell him that he needed to fix things with Steve or find out why Steve was so upset. He had found out why.   

Tony stomped around his workshop muttering curses about stupid men in their nineties. “Friday, revoke all of Steve’s access to anything related to the Avengers. And get a moving company to get his stuff out of here.” Friday didn’t respond instead there was a slight pause. “Friday?” 

 _“_ _I found the video that the scientist was referring to_ _,”_  Friday told him. 

“Great. Delete it.” 

There was another pause from Friday.  _“_ _I think you should watch it_ _,”_  Friday informed him.  

“Excuse me!?” Tony couldn’t believe he was having to argue with his A.I. about whether or not the sex video of him and Steve should be deleted or not. “I’m not gonna watch it. I don’t want to see the disgusted look on his face.” 

 _“_ _I really think you should watch it_ _,”_ Friday pushed. 

Tony paused. “Why?” 

 _“_ _I think you will get some clarity from it_. _”_  

“Are you my therapist now?” Tony asked, incredulously. 

 _“I’ve always been your therapist,”_ Friday pointed out. 

“Fine.” Tony said, relenting. “Pull it up.” He collapsed down into a chair, grumbling about meddling red heads. 

A HUD popped up next to him and the video began to play. Tony recognized the room they have been kept in. Steve was strapped to the chair, though still unconscious and Tony could see himself lying on the floor in the same state. After just a few minutes Steve began to stir. Another minute passed before he woke up fully. Once Steve noticed Tony on the floor, he started trying to get Tony’s attention. Tony felt a little satisfaction when he saw Steve strain against the bonds of his chair, muscles bulging. 

“I totally called that,” he told Friday. She ignored him. 

After another minute of Steve just trying to get Tony in the video to wake up, Tony was bored. “Skip to when the scientist guy comes in,” Tony told Friday. 

The video advanced to where the scientist came in. Tony watched as the little guy injected Steve with the black serum, then left, leaving Steve to suffer.  

Now that Tony knew what the drug did, he was able to see as Steve got more and more turned on by the drug. Even when Steve yelled at Tony in the video, Tony was able to pick up the desperation in his voice. He’d probably been mad that Tony was interrupting his fantasy about Sharon or something.  

However, Tony’s anger and indignation fled when they got to the part where the scientist came back into the room with the second guy. Steve was putting up a good front, but Tony could tell that Steve was struggling to keep it together. Then the video got to the part where Steve had begged to have Tony taken out of the room when the guy in the suit was going to question him. At the time Tony had thought Steve was trying some bullshit to protect Tony from torture. Now though, now that he knew Steve had had a sex drug coursing through his veins, a horrible thought struck him. Steve must have thought he was about to be raped. And his first thought had been to try and get Tony out of there so he didn’t have to witness it.  

“Oh, Steve.” He said, softly.  

It made a lot more sense when Steve laughed in the face of his attackers. He’d probably been relieved to realize it was only supposed to be a truth serum. And that the scientist and the other guy had no idea the state Steve was in.  

Then the video got to the part Tony didn’t remember. The little guy coming at him with a syringe, getting kicked in the stomach, and getting injected with the serum.  

He watched as the scientist chased the other guy out of the room. Steve, in the video also watched them go. That was when he turned back to Tony, trying to get his attention, trying to tell him that the door was still open.  

Tony watched himself in the video, frantically trying to get out of the handcuffs. Tony’s wrists ached in remembrance of how badly they’d been messed up by that stunt. Seeing it on video, he understood why. He must have been really out of it to not think of just dislocating his thumb.  

Once the him in the video was free, he crawled over to Steve. Tony expected to see himself free Steve, so he was very shocked when instead the him on the video screen pulled down Steve’s pants and sucked his cock down.  

“Holy shit!” 

The sight of himself giving Steve a blow job was the hottest thing he had ever seen. That is, until Steve climaxed a second later.  

Tony’s cock went from zero to sixty in under a second. And the video wasn’t even over yet.  

Tony watched, transfixed, as on the video he ditched his boxers and climbed up into Steve’s lap. He watched himself prep to take Steve’s, very impressive, cock. For a moment he was sure that it wouldn’t fit, then he remembered that he’d picked up a guy the night before getting kidnapped. A guy who might have had blonde hair and blue eyes. Tony had let the guy fuck him hard that night and the next morning. So, he wouldn’t have needed too much prep to take Steve.  

And sure enough, after only a minute of working his fingers inside himself, he grabbed Steve’s cock and slid down onto it.  

Steve was very vocal about how much he liked it.  

Tony in the video had Steve’s cock sliding in out of his ass and Tony in the present, watching the video, clenched his ass with need. He was panting as hard as the him in the video was.  

Then he was kissing Steve. Or he had kissed Steve. 

“Oh Fuck! Yes.” Tony moaned. He pressed his hand to his cock. 

When Steve came in Tony’s ass, Tony could see the cum making everything slick. Then Steve was begging Tony for one more climax and to go harder.  

Tony couldn’t take it anymore, he fumbled his pants open, freed his cock and began pumping it, making sure to keep his eyes firmly affixed on the video. He didn’t want to miss anything.  

Steve started talking dirty. _"I want to grab your cock. Let me touch you. I want to touch you."_  

“Oh fuck. Yeah, Steve.” Tony saw himself getting close to climaxing and Steve was demanding Tony come on him. Then, in the video, Tony bit down hard on Steve’s muscular shoulder.  

Tony gasped and spend up his hand. Biting was a major kink for him. But he rarely found anyone who liked to take it as hard as Tony liked to give it.  

Steve, apparently, was okay with it, because he climaxed with a scream of ecstasy.  

And that’s all Tony needed. He closed his eyes and threw his head back as he pumped his cock as hard and fast as he could, coming to the memory of what Steve’s face looked like when he climaxed.  

When he was finished and his breathing returned to normal, Tony realized that he’d missed the last part of the video. He rewound it, re-watching the last climax again, and watched them escaping. 

So, Tony mused, other than leaving out the part about where they had fantastic, uninhibited sex, Steve had basically told how things had happened.  

Tony got up from the chair, stripped down, and went to use the shower in his lab. As he was clean himself off, he mulled the problem over his head some more.  

To be fair, Tony could understand why Steve had had a hard time telling him about it at first. Tony wasn’t sure how he would have explained it if he was in that position. Maybe send a card and some flowers?  

Steve in the video had seem to enjoy it and been on board about it. Though that could have been from the serum. So maybe it was just afterwards that he began regretting everything and didn’t want to tell Tony about it? 

Tony got out of the shower and found some relatively clean clothes to put on then flopped down onto the couch he had in his workshop. 

He needed to talk to Steve about it, most definitely. Kicking him out have been a dick move on his part. It was just that he’d had flash backs to Siberia, to seeing his parents killed on video, and he’d over reacted.  

Tony lay on the couch, letting his mind wander along with the problem. It was hard to really concentrate on it, since he couldn’t stop thinking about the video and all the wonderful sounds Steve had made. And how he had begged Tony for completion. 

Tony groaned and covered his head with a pillow. He needed to think about something else or he was going to be ready for a second round sooner than later. He instead tried to think about other, non-sexy, parts of the video. Like being handcuffed to a cold concrete floor. Or the look of panic on Steve’s face when he had thought he was going to be- 

Tony flung the pillow off his face and sat up, eyes wide and mouth open at his realization. This wasn’t about the sex. This was about the lack of consent on both Steve’s and Tony’s part. They’d been capture and essentially forced to have sex. No wonder Steve had clammed up about it.  

“I’m such an idiot.” Tony slumped back down onto the couch. “Friday, do you have Steve’s location?” 

 _“His transmitter is still turned off.”_  

“Great.” First thing in the morning, Tony was going to go out and look for Steve, apologize, and maybe even have a little heart to heart. Or, at least, as much of a heart to heart that two emotionally constipated people could have. 

 

* * *

 

 

Matt Murdoch’s couch was very comfortable, but that didn’t do Steve any good. He spent most of the night lying awake thinking about Tony and how much he had messed things up, again. He kept coming back to the same thought, that he should have just told Tony everything.  

He tried to think about what Matt had told him, that Steve was traumatized by it all. That couldn’t be right though, this wasn’t even the most traumatic thing Steve had ever been through. Hell, he’d died and come back in a different millennium. That was way more traumatic.  

And, he had, in a way, enjoyed the sex. How could you be traumatized by something you enjoyed?  

That thought led to him finally coming to grips with something he’d been trying not to acknowledge. Not only had he enjoyed having sex with Tony, he wanted to do it again.  

And that was an entirely new idea for him.  

There have been guys in his neighborhood growing up who were homosexuals, and Steve had always felt that it was wrong to bully anyone so he’d always been nice to them. Plus, he could tell that they understood what it was like to be trapped within a body that didn’t meet your needs.     

And in art school he’s always been able to appreciate the beauty of the male models. And, well, he’s always been able to appreciate Tony’s beauty. But that’s where it had ended. Until now.  

Not that it matter now.  Steve had figured this out too late. Tony was not going to forgive him this time and Steve had a feeling that confessing to him that he wanted to have sex with him again was not going to go over well. 

Not that Tony wouldn't know anyway. He had the video and, knowing Tony, had probably watched it. He would already know exactly how much Steve had enjoyed everything.     

Steve finally dozed off and slept on and off for about two hours.  

Around six in the morning, he heard somebody coming up the stairs towards the apartment.  

Suddenly, Murdock was rushing out of his bedroom, pulling a shirt over his head, making a beeline for his front door. He got there just before it opened to reveal a shorter blond-haired guy about the same age as Matt. 

The guy didn’t look at all surprised that Matt was standing right in front of the door as if he had been waiting for him. Instead he just held up four large pastry boxes and began talking. “I got the weirdest text from Jessica this morning. She told me that I needed to head over to your apartment with enough donuts to feed an army and also that I owe her one. I figured you guys must be having some kind of meeting here this morning.” The guy pushed by Matt, who had a resigned sort of look on his face, and came into the apartment, setting the donuts down on Matt’s kitchen counter. “But I’m not sure how I’m the one who owes her if I’m the one bringing the donuts.” 

The guy turned towards the main living area, and that’s when he caught sight of Steve. He looked momentarily startled to see someone sitting on Matt’s couch. Then he noticed Steve’s uniform draped over the back of the couch followed immediately by Steve’s shield propped up by the side. 

He slowly turned to Matt. “Dude, Captain America is sitting on your couch.” 

Matt sighed. “I know Foggy. He needed a place to stay last night.” 

The guy’s eyes went wide. “You spent the night with Captain America? Wow that came out wrong. What I meant was Captain America spend the night here? In your apartment?” 

Steve stood up and walked over and extended his hand. “Hi, I’m Steve Rogers. It’s nice to meet you.”  

The guy slowly shook Steve’s hand like he was in a daze. “Franklin Nelson. Or Foggy. Is another name I go by. Like a nickname. Well, it is a nickname. Which you would know about. I mean your best friend goes by Bucky, so-.” 

“Foggy,” Matt cut in, trying not to smile. “You’re rambling.”   

Foggy let go of Steve’s hand. “Yeah. Sorry. I mean, wow. Just wow. I’ve met other superheroes. Well mostly Matt’s friends who are heroes.” Suddenly Foggy looked panicked as he looked back over at Matt. “Oh wait, should I have used your real name. I know he’s in your apartment and all, and you’re not wearing your costume but did you already tell him your real name or did I just let the cat out of the bag?” 

Matt couldn’t keep his grin contained any longer. “It’s okay, I already told him who I really am.” 

Foggy look very relieved. “Good. I’d hate to be the one who spilled Daredevil’s secret to Captain America. Oh, wait, did he know you were Daredevil? Or was he like, here as a client? I am really bad at this secret identity stuff.” 

“Captain Rogers was helping us figure out who’s been selling this new sex drug.” Matt told Foggy.  

Foggy’s whole demeanor changed. “Oh, that stuff,” he said, frowning in disgust. “It’s just awful.” He turned to Steve. “The worst part is, some of the victims don’t even know they’ve been assaulted, depending on what happens. We first got wind of it when someone came into our office telling us they thought they had been assaulted but couldn’t be sure. Then Jess got someone else telling her almost the exact same thing.” 

Steve felt his stomach drop at the thought of Tony being one of those victims. 

Matt cleared his throat. “We got the scientist who was manufacturing the drug. Tracked him down last night. Now we just have to find the dealer.” 

“Good. I hope when you find him you,” Foggy glanced over at Steve and seemed to decide to amend what he was going to say, “prosecute him to the full extent of the law.” 

Matt cocked his head to the side in the manner that Steve was beginning to understand meant he was listening to something. “Jessica, Luke and Danny are here.” 

Sure enough a minute later, the trio walk through the door. Jessica immediately made her way to the box of pastries and grabbed one. “You’re welcome,” she said to Foggy, around the mouth full of donut. 

“You know,” Foggy said, “you could’ve just told me that Captain America was crashing on Matt’s couch.” 

“Would you still have brought donuts if I had?” Jessica asked 

Foggy crossed his arms over his chest. “I would have brought Captain America donuts.” 

Danny hopped up on the counter and grabbed a donut for himself. “We think we found the guy who’s been dealing the drugs.” He said, without preamble. “Got a lead from a source we have at the police department.” 

Steve perked up. “That’s great news.” The sooner they could get this guy and the drugs off the street the better. And the sooner he could straighten things out with Tony. If that was even possible anymore.  

“We contacted Spiderman,” Danny continued, “he’s going to meet us here.” 

Jessica turned to Steve. “Seriously, how old is that kid? My bet is ten.” 

“He is not ten,” Luke said, “he’s at least thirteen.” 

“I really hope he’s not thirteen,” Danny said. “I’d feel bad putting a thirteen-year-old in danger.” 

“How old would he need to be before you didn’t feel bad?” Luke asked. 

“Matt says he’s between sixteen and seventeen,” Foggy said, gesturing at Matt with a half-eaten cruller.  

“How do you know that?” Danny asked Matt. 

“He did it with his creepy senses, I’m sure,” Jessica snorted. 

“It’s not creepy,” Matt protested. He didn’t sound offended, mostly resigned. 

“It’s kind of creepy,” Luke put in. 

“Wait, do you know his identity?” Danny asked Matt, excitedly. “You have to tell us.” 

“I don’t know his identity,” Matt said. He tried to lean over to get a donut, but Danny was in the way. Jessica grabbed him a donut instead and made to hand it to him. “Can I get one of the raspberry filled ones?” He asked her. 

She looked at the donut in her hand. “I thought this was raspberry.” 

“No, it’s cherry. The raspberry one is third from the top left.” 

Jessica rolled her eyes, but put back the cherry donut and grabbed Matt the one he had indicated. “See,” she said to Steve, “Creepy.” 

Steve chuckled. “I’m not so sure about that. But then again, I live with a guy who floats through walls and another who turns into the Hulk.” 

Foggy leaned in excitedly towards Steve. “Okay, I have to know, how do the Hulk’s pants work? I mean I’ve seen footage of Bruce Banner going Hulk, and you can see that he’s wearing just plain ordinary jeans. So, the jeans should rip to shreds along with the rest of his clothes, right? But they don’t! And don’t get me wrong, no one wants to see the Hulk’s full Monty, but still, the jeans shouldn’t fit.” 

“Ah...” Steve was saved from coming up with an explanation by Matt interceding. 

“Don’t you have a disposition this morning?” He asked Foggy. 

Foggy heaved a sigh. “Sadly, I do.” He grabbed another donut and headed towards the door. “Have fun hunting down a despicable drug dealer. And don’t think I’m not going to tell Karen that you let Captain America spend the night and didn’t tell her. I suggest a big bouquet of roses for the start of your apology.” 

“Goodbye Foggy,” Matt said pointedly.  

Foggy stuffed the donut in his mouth as he grabbed his suitcases and jacket and waved goodbye to everyone. 

“Say hi to Karen for us,” Danny called as Foggy left. 

Once he was gone the Defenders got on with their planning session. 

“Do we know what kind of defenses this guy has?” Danny asked. 

“I asked around about him,” Luke said. “He’s got deep pockets and used to buy stuff from Tommes before he got put away.” 

“He’s probably the one who ordered the weird machine gun thing Spiderman was telling us about.” Jessica said. “The one that can shoot tranq darts.” 

“Which means we should assume he’s prepared for enhanced people coming after him,” Luke said glancing over at Steve. 

“Regardless of that,” Steve said. “It shouldn’t be too hard to take him down. He’s just some low-level street thug.”   
It was the wrong thing to say if Luke’s scowl was anything to go by. 

“You ever gone up against one of these guys?” Luke demanded. “The kind who can buy any cop he wants? The kind of guy who can hire an army’s worth of thugs to shot up an entire neighborhood just to get at one guy?” 

Steve scowled. “No, I’ve gone up against worse.” 

Lucas scoffed. “Must be nice being a big important Avenger, can’t be bothered dirty his hands with street-level stuff.” 

“Luke,” Danny admonished. 

“I told you,” Steve said. “I just want to get this stuff off the streets. Now we’ve gotten the scientist, so we just need to get the dealer. And I know you think that I don’t know what I’m getting into, but you forget, I grew up on the streets of Brooklyn.” 

“Yeah, in the Nineteen-forties,” Luke said. 

Danny hopped off the counter and got between Luke and Steve. “All right that’s enough. We’re all on the same side here. We’re gonna take this guy down and get this drug off the streets. All right?”    

Danny stared Luke down until Luke nodded in agreement. Then Danny looked over Jessica. 

She just shrugged. “I was kind a hoping to see who would win in a fight, Luke or the old guy.” 

Danny gave her a disapproving look. 

Steve knew he wasn’t welcomed by all the Defenders. And that was okay. He just wanted to finish this. And despite what Luke he was insinuating, Steve doubted one drug dealer was really going to pose that much of a problem. 

 

* * *

 

 

Tony woke up with a headache. He had fallen asleep with his head cocked a funny angle and now he had the world‘s worst crick in his neck. And to make it worse, someone was yelling at him. 

“Tony. You need to get up. We’ve got to fix this mess.” 

Tony cracked an eye open to see Rhodey standing above him looking upset. Tony glanced around his workshop. All the evidence from last night’s entertainment was cleaned up, so Rhodey must have been referring to a different mess. 

“Can we fix it after coffee?” Tony asked, hopefully. 

“No time.” 

“There’s always time for coffee,” Tony grumbled as he rolled off the couch. He tried to ignore Rhodey and head for the coffee machine. “I’m sure whatever it is can’t be that bad.” 

Rhodey crossed his arms and stepped into Tony’s path. “Everyone knows what happened between you and Steve in France.”  

Tony paused. “Okay. That’s pretty bad. Still, not “No Coffee” bad.” 

But Rhodey wasn’t finished. “They also know you kicked Steve out and told him you never want to see him again.” 

“Ah, yes. That. And when you say everyone?” 

“That includes Barnes.” 

Tony groaned. He gave up trying to get to the coffee. “How?” Steve could have told Barnes about the being kicked out, but Tony doubted he would have opened up about France. Unless someone had finally pried the information out of his stubborn ass. 

“The scientist who Hill brought in.” Rhodey said by way of explanation. 

“Shit, I forgot about him.” Friday had told Tony that Peter had contacted Hill and that she was bringing the guy in. Tony just hadn’t given it much more thought than that. He’d still been too pissed at Steve to care about much else.  

“Yeah, well Nat caught wind of it and decided to pay the guy a visit. See if she could find out what was going on with Steve. And Barnes decided to come along.” 

Tony dropped his head down to his hands. “And we all know how persuasive Romanoff can be.” 

Rhodey snorted. “Please, she didn’t even do anything. The guy couldn’t wait to spill the whole story, seemed rather proud of himself. He even told them about you finding out about the video and the subsequent disowning of Steve. The only thing that finally shut him up was Barnes punching him in the face when he started trying to go into detail about what Steve had done in the video.” Rhodey looked a little uncomfortable. Which meant he’d probably heard some of it too. And Tony could only imagine which part the scientist had thought might be fun to describe to Steve’s homicidal best friend. “Good news is he won’t be able to talk for the next few months. At least until his jaw heals.” Rhodey added. 

Tony heaved another sigh. “And where is Barnes now?” Cause Tony was a little surprised that he hadn’t been woken up in a very violent way by everyone’s favorite Borg. 

Rhodey gestured back towards the door. “Bruce Hulked out. Hulk has him contained for now, but Barnes has that look like he’s going to try something. And Nat is getting that look that means she’ll probably help. Which brings us back to needing to fix this mess.” 

Tony scrubbed a hand over his face. “Yeah, probably should.” 

Rhodey held up his hands in a calming manner, “And I just want you to know I completely understand why you flipped out. I can only imagine that once you heard the word “video” there were a lot of bad memories flying up to the surface.” 

Tony shrugged. He’d rather not think about it. “Yeah, but I still over reacted.” 

Rhodey paused, looking a little unsure. “Hold up, you’re not mad at Steve?” 

“No, I’m mad. Some. Maybe more just really miffed.” 

Rhodey frowned in confused. “I’m lost. What changed from last night to this morning?” 

“I watched the video,” Tony said, gesturing over to the chair he’d sat in last night. 

Rhodey’s expression went from confused to just resigned. “Of course you did.” 

“Hey, it’s not like that,” Tony protested. “I mean, I was in it. Plus, it was Friday’s idea, not mine. I just wanted it deleted, but she insisted I watch it.” 

 _“And I stand behind that,”_  Friday interjected.  

Tony gestured with a “see” kind of a wave. 

 “Okay,” Rhodey said, slowly, “but we still need to go get Steve and let him know you’re not mad. Or less mad. Whatever.” 

“No, _I_  need to go get Steve. No way is he going to want to talk about this with anyone else present.” Tony searched around and found his shoes. “Friday, any luck locating Steve.” Tony asked as he hopped around trying to get his shoes on. 

Friday answered almost immediately. “Yes, he is with Spiderman.” 

A HUD popped up to show Steve from Peter’s perspective. He was once again hanging out with the Defenders. 

Rhodey gawked at the video feed. “Is that Luke Cage? I love that guy. He’s my hero.” 

“You’re literally a superhero yourself.” Tony pointed out as he assembled the armor around himself. 

Rhodey shrugged. “Doesn’t mean I can’t respect a fellow hero’s work.” He eyed Tony in the armor. “Sure, you don’t want some back-up?” 

Tony shook his head. “Don’t worry, I’ll call you if we start battling to the death again.” He opened the skylight overhead so he could fly out of the room directly without having to run the risk of running into Barnes. 

Rhodey glared at him. “Don’t even joke about that.”  

Suddenly, a roar from the Hulk shook the building. 

Tony took a step towards the hallway the roar had come from. “Maybe I should...” 

Rhodey held up a hand. “No, I’ll take care of that. You go get your boy back.” 

“My  _boy_!?” 

But Rhodey was already running out of the room. 

“Whatever,” Tony muttered. He formed the helmet around his head and took off. “Friday, connect me to Peter.” As soon as he was connected, he began talking. “Peter, it’s Stark. Don’t let on that I’m talking to you.” 

Peter went,  _“Mmhmm,”_  in a very suspicious way. 

Tony rolled his eyes. “I’m on my way to your position. I need you to keep Rogers there with you until I arrive.” 

 _“Are we sure this is a good idea?”_  Peter asked, obviously aiming the comment at Tony, but the others around him thought he must be talking to them. 

Tony saw Jones scowl at Peter,  _“What’s wrong with our plan?”_ she demanded. 

 _“Just maybe we should stop and not rush in and surprise certain people. Maybe consider alternative options. Maybe ones in a more private setting?”_  

“You are really bad at this,” Tony told Peter. 

Steve was looking at Peter in concern.  _“What are you trying to say, Spiderman?”_  

 _“Recon!”_  Peter blurt out.  _“We need to do some recon before we go charging in.”_   

“Good one,” Tony said. Tony could see Steve’s face practically light up at Peter’s suggestion. Steve loved when others suggested recon. 

 _“Great idea. Jessica, you and Luke-”_  

 _“Hold up,”_  Jones held up her hands, _“Are you forgetting something? Mainly that you’re not in charge?_ ” 

Steve got his stubborn scowl he got when someone was questioning his authority. _“It’s sound strategy.”_  He barked back. 

 _“Yeah,”_  Peter put in, rather desperately.  _“And what about the rhino tranq machine gun?”_  

This managed to derail Jones completely. _“Rhinos!?”_  

 _“He’s talking about the gun the Tinkerer made.”_  Rand explained. 

 _“Yeah, that thing,”_  Peter said. _“The scientist guy didn’t have it, so the dealer probably does. So, it makes sense that we should check the place out, see if it’s here and what other kinds of defenses this guy has.”_  

Jones looked to Cage, probably for support, but Cage just shrugged. _“It makes sense.”_  

Jones rolled her eyes. _“Fine.”_  And she began walking off towards the warehouse. 

 _“Wait,”_  Steve called after her _. “We need to coordinate.”_  

 _“No, we don’t,”_  Jones called back, Cage already following behind her. 

Rand looked slightly apologetic for his team mates. _“I guess they’re going to take the east side of the building?”_  He looked at Daredevil, as if for some kind of help. 

Daredevil just gestured to the building, _“Danny and I can take the south side, work our way towards Jessica and Luke.”_  He said, talking to Steve.  _“You and Spiderman can take the west side, then we can meet back on the north side.”_  

Tony was prepared for Steve to argue with Daredevil. Steve was used to taking over missions with other teams whether those involved wanted him to or not. With the only exception being if he trusted the other leader enough to know what they were doing. Which was why Tony was surprised when Steve just nodded his agreement and only added that Spiderman could also check the roof.  

Whatever. At least Steve would be occupied for a while, giving Tony the time he needed. 

“Should be there in under twenty,” he told Peter. 

 The Iron Man armor streaked across the sky, eating the miles up quickly. Tony kept tabs on Steve via Peter, and he watched as the two of them finished checking the building out and made it back to the rendezvous point before the others. Which was very convenient since that was when Tony finally arrived. Tony saw the exact moment Steve heard him approaching. Steve jerked his head up, searching the sky. Tony felt a pit open up in his stomach at the sight of Steve going pale when he saw the armor approaching.  

Tony landed and quickly banished his helmet so Steve could see his face. “I’m not here to fight,” he said, raising a gauntleted hand in a calming gesture. But Steve was eyeing the gauntlet as if he expected Tony to blast him. “Shit.” Tony disassembled the gauntlets so that both his hands were bare. “I just want to talk.” 

Steve looked back at the warehouse, “Now’s not really a good time.” 

“We found the guy who’s been selling the drug that the scientist was making,” Peter explained. “This is his base of operations.” 

“Great,” Tony said, “we can finish this. Throw these assholes in some deep dark pit. Preferable one with scorpions at the bottom.” 

“I don’t think that’s legal,” Peter said, thoughtfully. 

Steve was studying Tony’s face. “We?” He asked, sounding ever so slightly hopeful. 

Tony could see the Defenders heading towards them, so he rushed to get out what he needed to say. “I overreacted. Someone said “video” to me and I lost it. You’re not kicked out of the Avengers. Or the Upstate facility. Or, you know, anywhere else. Except that one club downtown. They really don’t want you back there.” 

Steve looked like he wasn’t sure what to make of any of what Tony had just said. “Why?” He finally asked. 

“Well, you did throw one of their bouncers through a wall.” 

Steve huffed out a surprised laughed, which Tony counted as a win. “I mean, why are you over it so quickly?” 

The Defenders were now within hearing distance. Tony could see Daredevil, the only one not glaring at Tony, talking to the others. “Cause you tried to get me out of the room before you knew it was just supposed to be a truth serum.” 

Steve went pale again, glancing over at Peter with a slightly panicked look. Peter, for his part, had been studying his web shooters for the last minute. 

The Defenders walked up, all of them, except Daredevil, eyeing Tony warily. Cage folded his arms across his, rather impressive, chest. “We all good here?” he rumbled. 

Tony looked at Steve. “Are we?” 

Steve studied Tony for a second. Probably trying to decide if Tony was being sincere or if the whole thing was going to go horribly wrong. Which, to be fair, that had happened before. Steve must have decided it was worth the risk, or something, because he finally nodded.  

Tony let the gauntlets and helmet form again as he said, “Great, let’s go catch some scum of the earth, shall we?” 

 

The recon had shown that there wasn’t much on the main floor, which meant that there was probably a sub level where all the fun illegal stuff was happening. Steve laid out a plan of attack, and with Tony backing him up, the Defenders agreed to it. Steve had shot Tony a small grateful look, which made Tony remember why he’d been trying to patch things up with Steve just a few weeks ago. With any luck, they’d be able to move forward from this without too much trouble. 

Steve signaled to Tony. Tony aimed his gauntlets at the main door of the warehouse and blasted it to pieces.  

Steve and Cage were through the door first, the plan being that they could take any gun fire their entrance would surely bring. Except, there was none.  

“Ah, where is everybody?” Peter asked, from where he was standing next to Tony.  

They advanced slowly into the warehouse. Tony scanned for any counter measures, but didn’t find anything. He did, however, find a lead lined wall that he couldn’t scan through. “I have a feeling everyone’s back there.” He said, pointing at the wall in question.  

Steve looked at the wall, “Why do you say that?” 

As if to conveniently answer the question, a panel in the wall suddenly swung open. There was a tall man, grinning cruelly, standing behind what looked like a futuristic machine gun. 

“Rhino tranquilizer gun!” Peter yelled. 

“Get down!” Daredevil yelled, even as he jumped behind a thick pillar.  

The man laughed and opened fire. 

Tony moved to put himself between Peter and the incoming fire. Half a second later he could hear dozens of small metal projectiles hitting the armor, followed by the sound of glass breaking. He spared a quick glance to the others and could see what was being shot at them. And it actually looked like rhino tranquilizers. They were large darts with glass vials of black liquid. Tony had a sinking feeling the color could only mean one thing was in those vials. And the gun was shooting them out in rapid succession as the bad guy sprayed the room. 

Daredevil was protected by the pillar. Rand had put his back to Cage, who was facing the oncoming projectiles as if they were nothing more than confetti. And, with the way the darts were exploding on impact with his skin, Tony guessed they probably weren’t much of a concern. 

Then Tony saw Steve. 

Jones had been exposed in the middle of the room, nothing for her to duck behind. Nothing except Steve. He must have jumped between her and the darts. He was curled around her, using his larger body to protect her. His shield was on his back, and the darts were smashing upon impact with it. However, that left his legs completely unprotected, and whatever the darts were made of, they were able to penetrate the material of Steve’s uniform. There had to be well over a dozen already sticking into the meat of his thighs and calves, injecting their poison into Steve.  

Tony acted quickly. Without even turning around, he targeted the tranq gun and launched several small missiles. The gun exploded in the guy’s hands. 

The second the gun was out of play, Daredevil, Cage, and Rand launched themselves at the open wall as a flood of armed men came rushing out at them. Most were armed with regular guns, but there were several who had enhanced weapons. One of them fired a sonic burst that sent Cage flying across the room. 

Tony ignored it. “Friday, was Peter hit?” 

 _“Karen is reporting that the structure of the_ _Spider-Man_   _suit is_   _uncompromised_ _.”_  

As soon as he knew Peter was okay, Tony used his boot jets to quickly blast across the room and get to Steve’s side. Steve had dropped down to all fours, his face dripping sweat as he clenched his teeth in obvious pain. Jones was still with him, she was working quickly to pull the darts out of Steve’s legs, but Tony could tell that it was a futile effort since most of the darts had already emptied their contents into Steve. 

Peter landed next to Tony. “Mr. Stark, what should we do?” 

Tony grabbed Jones, who cursed at him, and shoved her at Peter. “Get her away from here.” 

Peter wrapped an arm around Jones waist, muttering an embarrassed “excuse me”, and swung away with her. Tony was vaguely aware that Peter had moved them into the fight, but Tony was only concerned with Steve at the moment. 

“Friday, get me Bruce, right now.” 

A second later, Natasha’s voice was coming through the comms.  _“Banner’s still not back with us,”_  she told him coolly.  _“He had to let the Hulk out to make sure you didn’t get your ass beat. Is there something I can help you with?”_ She finished with false lightness.  

Tony did not have time to deal with any guilt trip shit right now. Steve was dripping sweat and pounding his fist against the concrete floor so hard there were cracks beginning to form. “Then get me Cho or one of the other doctors on duty. Hell, I’d even accept Strange right now as long as it’s someone with some fucking medical knowledge!” 

Natasha didn’t answer for a beat. Then, in a much more serious tone of voice,  _“Give me a minute.”_  

Suddenly Steve whipped his head up and locked eyes on Tony. 

“I don’t have a minute!” 

Steve’s pupils were blown so wide his eyes were just black, no trace of blue to be seen. And he was looking at Tony with a sort of manic desperation. And Tony had flash backs to the video he’d watched the night before. Specifically of the sounds Steve made when he came. Which, were completely inappropriate and unhelpful for the current situation. 

“Steve, I'm going to get you some help,” Tony said, trying to sound calm, and not think of Steve begging. “You just need to hold on.” 

Steve launched himself at Tony.  

“Oh shit!” Tony managed to side step Steve, but Steve just immediately turned back and went for Tony again. 

Tony tried to grab onto him, but Steve’s moves were so frantic that it was hard to do.  

 _“Tony?”_  Bruce’s voice came over the comms, sounding really out of it. Natasha must have gotten the Hulk to change back. _“You, you wanted to, um, talk to me?”_    
Tony caught Steve’s wrists as he went for Tony’s faceplate. “Yup, we have a problem. Friday?” Tony was too busy with Steve to really articulate things. 

 _“Uploading pertinent data.”_ Friday said.  

Tony heard Bruce suck in a shocked breath. Then Natasha’s voice could be heard in the background,  _“What’s going on?”_  

 _“Nothing, nothing. I just have too, ah, yeah. Hold on, I’m just going to- No, you stay there. I’ll, um, be right back. Friday, lock down the lab.”_  

 _“Bruce, what-”_  But Natasha’s voice was cut off. 

 _“What the hell happened?”_  Bruce was asking. 

“Bad guy, tranq gun. Not for a stampede of rhinos.” Tony grunted out as he flipped Steve and shoved him face first up against a wall.  “Please tell me you just happened to come up with an antidote for this stuff in the last twenty-four hours.” Steve shoved back against Tony with enough force to send him back a few steps. Then Steve jumped up, pushed against the wall, and came flying at Tony. He hit Tony in the chest and Tony was almost knock down. Steve was clearly not holding back. The only thing Tony had going for him was that Steve’s movements were sloppy from his, ah, condition. 

 _“Unfortunately, no.”_  Bruce said.  _“But I do have some good news. This stuff has an incredibly short half-life. It comes on strong but then burns out fast.”_  

Steve latched on to Tony, wrapped one leg around Tony’s hip and thrust against the armor. He let out the most erotic groan that went straight to Tony’s cock.  

 _“What was that?”_ Bruce asked, suspiciously. 

“Exactly what you think it was.” Tony replied. Steve was panting against Tony’s neck and trying to rub himself off while also desperately trying to pry Tony out of his suit. Tony’s imagination helpfully supplied scenarios where Steve succeeded in doing so. And now Tony was well on his way to being hard.  

“So,” Tony said, his voice only cracking a little, “l’m supposed to what, wait until this stuff wears off?” 

 _“Steve’s advanced metabolism should burn through it in”_  Bruce pauses for a second,  _“With the dose he received, probably half an hour.”_  

“Half an hour!?” Tony managed to get enough leverage to shove Steve off of him. Steve stumbled back, then immediately went for Tony again. Eyes still blown wide as he tried to dig his fingers into Tony’s hips. “I’m not going to be able to last that long.” 

 _“The other option, is to, ah, give the drug what it wants.”_  Bruce said, as professionally as he could manage.  _“If it was a regular person you’d probably have to do that to prevent heart failure. Steve should be okay to just wait it out though.”_  

Tony couldn’t help stumbling back as Steve gave a particularly powerful thrust with his hips. Not because Steve had actually overpowered him, but because of the spike of arousal it sent through Tony.  

“I’m going to die,” Tony groaned.  

“ _We can be there in twenty,”_  Bruce said.  

Tony grabbed one of Steve’s arms and wrenched it a way from where he was grabbing at Tony’s crotch. “NO! Don’t come!” 

 _“Why not?”_  

“You really think Steve wants anyone else to see him like this?” As if to emphasize his point, Steve gave a cry of frustration at Tony’s literal cock blocking.  

 _“Okay, that’s a valid point._ _”_ Bruce hedged. “ _Except Nat and Barnes are already suiting up and heading to the jet._ _Sam and Clint are with them.”_  

Great. “How do they even know where to go?” 

 _“Rhodes told us earlier that Steve was with Peter.”_  

Now Tony wanted to scream with frustration. “Stall them!” 

Natasha’s voice came through again. _“Sorry_ _,_ _we’re already taking off. Bruce, get your ass on the jet.”_  

Why was everyone always conspiring against him?  

Steve suddenly remembered he had his shield with him and decided to bring it into play.  

Tony just managed to get his arms up in time to block the blow to his head. “FUCK!” 

 _“You okay Stark?”_  At least Natasha sounded concerned now.  

Tony was trying to duck Steve’s shield as best he could without actually hurting Steve. “Going… to have… to…call you…back.” He ignored Natasha’s protests as he disconnected the call. “Peter! Can you get Cap’s shield away from him?” 

The fight with the drug dealers had been raging on while Tony had been dealing with Steve. Tony had caught glimpses of Peter swinging around, webbing up bad guys.  

“I got it, Mr. Stark!” Peter called out.  

Webbing wrapped around Steve’s shield and wrenched it from his hands. Steve was pulled off balance momentarily and Tony used the opening to pin Steve to the floor.  

Peter whipped the shield through several bad guys, neatly knocking them out, before catching the shield and using it to block a hail of bullets aimed at him.  

“Um, Mr. Stark, we have a problem.” 

Steve tried to head butt Tony, all the while scrabbling at the armor, trying to get through it to get to Tony’s body. “No shit, kid.” 

Peter seemed to like his new toy and swung the webbed shield out again, like the world’s deadliest yo-yo. “Ah, no, not that. Mr. Cage has been hit with the serum. That guy, the one who was using the rhino gun, I guess he had a smaller one too. He shot Mr. Cage in the face and, well the syringes broke and Daredevil says that the liquid must have gotten in his mouth.” 

“Well that’s just fantastic.” Tony grumped. The guy must have survived Tony’s initial volley and was now trying to cause more trouble with his backup nerf gun. 

Tony still had Steve pinned down, but it was like trying to keep hold of an octopus. Steve was constantly breaking his arms or legs free and Tony was struggling to stay in control.  

And of course Peter’s bad news wasn’t over. “Mr. Cage is going after Ms. Jones. You know, like, um, like Captain Rogers is, um, you know. Anyway, they’re both out of the fight.” 

And, of course, that was the whole point of spraying them with a sex drug. This guy couldn’t hope to win a fair fight with them, so he decided to fight dirty.  

Tony was trying to figure how to finish the fight with the drug dealers men, while at the same time keeping Steve from doing something he would regret later. His thought process was interrupted by Daredevil calling out a warning a second before the concussive force of the sonic canon hit Tony and Steve. They were thrown back across the room, flying away from each other. Tony hit the floor and skidded a few more feet before stopping and righting himself.  

Steve wasn’t as lucky and had hit a pillar before crashing to the floor. He was trying to get up but seemed a little dazed.  

Tony took the brief respite to evaluate the fighting around him. He saw Daredevil and Rand backed into a corner, the tall guy with the dart gun grinning wickedly as he aimed the gun. Tony felt a whole lot of satisfaction as he repulsor blasted the asshole. He also managed to mow down a group of thugs who had decided to take refuge behind a pile of rubble and were sniping at Peter. Then Steve was back on his feet and running flat out towards Tony.  

Tony fired up his boots and launched himself at Steve. It was time to stop holding back. He hit Steve full force, grabbing him around the waist and knocking the air out of him. He kept going, slamming him and Steve through a wall that was just wood and plaster, into a separate section of the warehouse and slamming against the brick wall on the far side of the room.  

Tony let go of Steve, allowing him to slide to the floor in a heap. Steve was still conscious, but only just.  

Tony let his helmet recede back so he could talk to Steve. “This stuff is gonna burn out of your system soon. You’ve just got to keep it together until then.”  

Steve was trying to get to his feet, movements sloppy as he fought against his concussion.  

“Come on Steve,” Tony practically pleaded, “stay down.” 

Steve climbed to his feet using the wall for support. He shook his head, either to clear it or in response to Tony’s plea. Maybe both. He lurched forward and Tony was easily able to grab him and pin his arms to his sides.  

“Steve, focus.” 

“I need it,” Steve said, his voice thick and gravely. It was the first thing he’d spoken since getting drugged up and Tony took it as a good sign. “I need it so bad. I need you. I want you so bad.” 

And now Tony wished that Steve would go back to being quiet. “Steve,” he breathed out.  

Steve thrust his head forward and collided their mouths together in a desperate kiss.  

Tony’s mind stuttered to a halt at the feel of Steve’s hot mouth. Without consciously deciding to, Tony opened his mouth to Steve’s assault and gave as good as he got. He thrust his tongue against Steve’s, tasting him and drawing long moans from his throat. Tony forgot himself and everything around him. He moved one arm around Steve’s waist, gripping him tight. The other he used to thread his fingers into Steve’s hair, pushing their mouths more firmly together as he kissed Steve with everything he had. He wanted Steve, more than he thought he’d ever wanted anything before.  

Steve, now that his hands were free, began clawing at the armor again. When he didn’t make any progress he gave up and instead went to work on his own clothes, tearing at straps, zippers and cloth in a desperate attempt to get naked.  

All the while Tony wouldn’t move his mouth away from Steve’s. He kissed him hard and deep, letting each of Steve’s moans echo through him. He was rock hard, and the armor was becoming very uncomfortable. He needed to get it off. Or maybe leave most of it on so he could continue to overpower Steve.  

Tony wrenched himself away from Steve with a gasp. Steve immediately protested and moved back in. Tony grabbed him, twisted him around and down. They dropped to the floor together, Steve on his knees, immobilized under the heavy armor.  

“I’m sorry,” Tony whispered into Steve’s ear.  

Steve struggled against Tony when he realized he was not going to get what he wanted. “No!” He cried out in despair. He pushed his ass back against Tony. “No, Tony please! I need you!” His voice breaking with a sob.  

Tony sucked in a steadying breath. Steve’s struggles were doing nothing to help his erection. “Friday, under no circumstances are you to allow me to get out of the armor while Steve’s like this.” 

 _“You want me to act as your chastity belt?”_ Friday scoffed.  

“Yes.” Tony ground out. He wasn't sure if he could trust himself. And now was not the time to screw up. 

Friday paused for a beat before saying, _“You got it boss.”_  

Steve began thrashing against Tony in an effort to break free. “Please! I need you Tony!” He cried out. “I need you, I need, I need you to fuck me. Please, please fuck me!” 

Tony locked his arms together around Steve’s chest holding him firmly in place.  

“No! No! Let me go!” Steve screamed in an anguish.  

“Mr. Stark?” Peter’s voice came from the hole in the wall. “Everything okay?” 

Tony turned his head to look at Peter and yelled “Stay out!” far harsher than he’d meant to do.  

Peter jumped back, and Tony was sure that Peter probably looked hurt behind the mask. Then Daredevil was there, pulling Peter away and saying something comforting.  

Beneath him, Steve began to sob.  

“Please Tony. I want you. I’ve wanted you since France. I’ve dreamed about it. Dreamed of fucking you. Let me fuck you. Please! Please! It felt so good. And it hurts. It hurts so bad. Make it stop!” 

Tony buried his face against Steve’s neck. “No.” 

“Please!” Steve sobbed. “I want it! I want you! I promise. It’s been so hard being around you. I want, I want! I just couldn’t tell you what happened. I didn’t know how. It felt so good. I dreamt I was fucking you. I’d wake up thinking of you. Tony it hurts!” 

Tony squeezed his eyes shut. “I know. I’m sorry.” 

“Please let me go.” Steve begged. “I don’t want to do this again. I don’t want to be tied down again! I couldn’t move. I couldn’t move and it hurt! It hurts so bad!” 

Tony wondered, as Steve sobbed in his arms, if maybe that scientist had invented a truth serum for Super Soldiers after all. A truth serum with one horrible side effect.  

Steve planted his hands on the ground, then shoved back against Tony. Tony’s hold slipped and Steve got free. He twisted himself back towards Tony, grabbed onto him and smashed their mouth together again. 

Tony couldn’t repress a small moan. But he got his act together and managed to slam Steve down to the ground, stunning him long enough for Tony to get on top of him and pin him to the ground. 

“Let me go!” Steve screamed thrashing uncontrollably. “I can’t, I can’t do it again. I couldn’t move and they had to know. They had to know what was happening to me! And they were going to use it to get me to talk. And you were there. And you were going to hate me if I told you what happened.” Steve broke down with racking sobs.  

Tony was kneeling over Steve, his legs pinning Steve’s legs and his hands gripping Steve’s shoulders. the heavy armor was probably bruising Steve, but Tony didn’t dare let up. He wished he could take it off so Steve could be held against his body, instead of the cold hard armor.  

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered, resting his forehead against Steve’s. The skin on skin contact seemed especially important now as Steve’s whole body shook with the force of his sobs. Steve’s face was soaked with sweat and tears and Tony wanted nothing more than to gently wipe him clean. He squeezed his eyes shut and reminded himself why he couldn’t kiss Steve again, no matter how much he wanted to.  

This had turned into such a cluster fuck. 

Tony noticed that the sounds of fighting had stopped. He wondered how long it had been since everything started. He also wondered when the tears had started leaking from his own eyes.  

Eventually, the gut wrenching sobs lessened, replaced by hitched breathing. And while Steve was no longer struggling, he was shaking uncontrollably.  

Tony changed his grip from forcibly holding Steve down, to wrapping his arms around Steve and pulling him up to his chest. He didn’t want to completely let Steve loose in case he lost control again, but it was now more of an embrace instead of restrainting. And he tried to pretend that he had his hands fisted in Steve’s uniform just for safety reasons.  

 _“Boss,”_  Friday said, gently. _“The other Avengers have arrived.”_  

“Tell Bruce to come in alone.” Tony instructed, hoping that the other Avengers would, just this once, listen to his wishes.  

A minute later he was very relieved to see Bruce step through the hole alone.  

He cautiously approached where Tony and Steve were huddled. At that point Steve was shaking so hard that Tony was probably the only thing keeping him from collapsing on the floor.  

Bruce knelt down in front of them. “How’s he doing?” He asked Tony.  

“I think it’s passed for the most part,” Tony had to work to keep his voice steady. “But he’s been shaking like this for the past five minutes.” 

“Steve?” Bruce called out gently. “Is it all right if I take a look at you?” 

Steve nodded jerkily.  

Tony tried to let him go, but Steve grabbed onto his arms and wouldn’t let go. So instead, Tony helped him sit up. He was right about being the only thing keeping Steve from collapsing, as soon as they were upright Steve slumped back against him.  

Bruce hooked Steve up to a mobile health monitor and took a small prick of blood that he stuck in another machine.  

Tony made the mistake of glancing over towards the other room and caught a glimpse of Barnes lurking on the other side of the hole.  

“Your blood pressure and heart rate are normalizing.” Bruce declared, staring down at the monitor. “Your temperature is normal, so the shaking isn’t from cold.” He picked up the small machine with the blood sample and frowned some more. “Your adrenaline is through the roof, probably what’s causing you to shake. You’re also severely dehydrated. When was the last time you drank something?” 

Tony felt a twist of guilt. Had Steve not eaten or drank since yesterday? Where had he stayed the night before? 

“This morning,” Steve rasped out. “Had some donuts too.” He was smiling slightly, which went along way towards making Tony feel a little better. He must have been okay if his breakfast was something to smile about.  

“You’re sweating a lot.” Bruce observed, taking in Steve’s hair that was plastered to his head. As well as his sweat soaked uniform. “Let’s get you back to the Avenjet, put you on an IV.” 

Steve just nodded.  

Bruce and Tony immediately shared a look over Steve’s head. Normally, Steve would put up a fight about being hooked up to an IV.  

Tony hoisted Steve up and practically carried Steve over to the hole they had made earlier. Steve didn’t protest being manhandled either, another worrisome sign.  

When they got to the hole, Barnes was waiting for them. Tony braced himself for whatever scathing remarks Barnes had probably been dying to say to him. But Barnes just grabbed Steve and pulled him carefully through the hole, a look of concern on his face. Steve slumped against Barnes and allowed himself to be led out. Sam met them about halfway and grabbed Steve’s other arm, slinging it over his shoulder to help support him. Natasha and Clint were standing with Daredevil and Peter as they surveyed the damage. The bad guys were either unconscious, dead, or sitting quietly on the floor, hands cuffed behind their backs. The main guy who’d been shooting everyone with the sex drug, was lying unconscious, repulsor burns marring his chest. Tony had the sudden urge to shake the guy awake just so he could see the fear in the guys eyes as Tony beat him back to oblivion with his fists.  

He clamped down on the thought and tried to think calming, non-murdery thoughts.  

Bruce looked at Tony, concern evident on his face. “Are you okay?” 

Tony shrugged, brushing off the concern. “Sure. Why wouldn’t I be?” 

Bruce didn’t look convinced. “Do you want to talk?” 

“I thought you weren’t that kind of doctor,” Tony jabbed.  

Bruce just smiled. “I’m that kind of friend.” 

And now it was uncomfortable. Tony waved Bruce off. “Go take care of your patient. I’ll handle cleanup.”  

“You sure?” 

They could hear police sirens approaching. “Yeah. Get Steve back to the compound. I don’t want him associated with this. You know the reporters aren’t going to be far behind.” 

Bruce accepted the excuse, gave Tony a comforting, if awkward, pat on his shoulder, and headed out towards the jet. He passed Clint and Natasha along the way, said something to them that Tony couldn’t hear. Clint and Nat nodded, then Natasha made her way over to Tony. 

“Hill is on her way.” She told him. “Figure we should throw these guys in the same hole as Dr. Carmike.” She gestured at the drug dealer and his goons. 

“Good plan.” The last thing they needed was for a story about Captain America being given a sex drug to get out. 

Natasha studied his face for a moment. “You okay?”  

“I’m fine!” He told her, with more force than was necessary to actually convince someone they were fine. 

Natasha raised an eyebrow at him, but left it alone. Instead she said, “You know, when I asked you to fix things with Steve, I didn’t mean make a bigger mess in the process.”  

Tony snorted a laugh. “You should know me better than that by now, Romanoff.” 

 

Hill arrived and spent a good twenty to thirty minutes arguing with the local police. Cage and Jones resurfaced looking like they had enjoyed themselves way more than Steve and Tony had. And Tony threatened to tell Aunt May if Peter ever got caught up in sex drugs again.  

After Hill won her custody battle, they loaded all the bad guys up in a SHIELD paddy wagon and took them to be process.  

The Defenders went to get drinks, Peter had homework, and Tony was left with no excuse not to go home. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the reason there is such a long time between now and my last update is because I became frustrated with the story. I felt like it wasn't my best work and that it had gotten away from me at some point. One of the biggest frustrations I was having was trying to figure out the ending. I had thought I knew how I wanted it to end, but it just didn't seem right for some reason. Then about a month ago I went back and began to rewrite a few things in previous chapters, at that point I felt as though the story finally took it's proper shape and I was able to find the ending I had wanted all along.  
> A good example of what finally fell easily into place is the conversation between Steve and Matt. I knew I wanted Matt to be the one to help Steve begin to come to grips with what had happened to him, but nothing I did was working. Then I started writing the conversation as if Matt were arguing a case in court. The logical way Matt approached it just felt right and like something that would appeal to Steve more than an emotional heartfelt talk.  
> I have 1 more chapter to finish up and that will be it for this fic. Hope everyone is enjoying it. Please leave comments and kudos.


	6. There is Truth in the Space Between

Bucky and Sam got Steve to the Avenjet and had him hooked up to an IV before Steve was really aware of what was happening. The cool fluid being pumped into his veins felt amazing. He was still too hot and he could feel the phantom burn of the serum.  

His clothes were already half undone and he tried to get the top of his uniform off, but his movements were clumsy.  

Bucky was there, helping him out of his uniform. His metal hand brushed against Steve and Steve immediately latched onto it, pressing the cool metal against his forehead. He moaned with relief.  

“Ah, Steve?” Bucky sounded uncomfortable for some reason.  

“Relax man, I think he’s just enjoying the cold.” That’s right, Sam was here too.  

There was the sound of something crinkling and then Sam was pressing something very cold against Steve. “Here, try this.” 

Steve let go of Bucky’s arm and grabbed the ice pack instead, burying his face in it. It felt so good. Another ice pack was placed on Steve’s neck and he felt ten times better.  

“It didn’t feel like this last time,” he grumbled.  

“That’s because you had a different outcome last time.” Bruce was back. He was putting the weird sticky pads on Steve, the ones that would measure his heart rate.  

“Tony didn’t want to have sex this time,” Steve lamented. “Cause he hates me.” Tears were leaking down Steve’s face again.  

“It’s the drug,” Bruce was telling someone. “It’s still in his system. The worst of it is over, but he’s going to be out of it for a while yet.” 

Bucky sat down next to Steve; his cool metal arm pressed against Steve’s side. With his flesh hand, he wiped Steve’s tears away. “Stark doesn’t hate you. He was just keeping you safe from this drug.” 

Steve leaned heavily against Bucky. His whole body felt like it had been drained of energy. “I want to go home. I don’t feel good.” 

“Clint’s starting up the jet, we’ll be home soon.” Bucky assured him. 

“Tony said I’m not kicked out, so I can go home.”  

Bucky’s metal hand clenched where it was resting on Steve’s thigh.  

Sam, who had sat down on his other side, and was adjusting ice packs, said, “How ‘bout you just rest and not talk right now.” 

Steve just nodded wearily. 

They were flying and the sensation of the jet moving made Steve feel weird. He latched on to Bucky as much as he could, but his limbs felt heavy and his grip kept slipping. 

Bucky pulled Steve close to him and wrapped both arms around him. Steve buried his face against Bucky’s chest as his body began shaking again. 

He could hear people talking quietly about him. 

“Is he going to be okay?” Natasha was asking. 

“Eventually,” Bruce answered. “He got a huge dose of the stuff, probably would have killed anyone else. And since he didn’t get to engage in intercourse, there’s no outlet for all the hormones and chemicals his body released. That’s why he keeps shaking.” 

“Would a sexual release help?”  

“I’d rather not go that route unless we have to. Especially with how it affected him last time.” 

“Yeah,” that was Clint, “I’d rather not get a lamp thrown at me again.” 

“There’s no guarantee of that.” Natasha said, and Steve could hear the smirk in her voice. 

Steve felt awful as he remembered how he’d been acting over the past few weeks. Hot tears burned his eyes. 

Bucky pulled him closer and whispered comforting words. 

They landed a short time later and Bucky was pulling Steve up and leading him down the ramp and into the facility. Rhodey was waiting for them with one of the medical teams. They had a stretcher with them, but Steve immediately panicked at the sight of the straps on the gurney.  

Bucky yelled at them to get away and he assured Steve that no one was going to tie him down.  

They got to the Medical wing with Bucky and Sam supporting Steve most of the way. They had him sit down on one of the regular exam tables with no straps.     

Bruce dismissed the doctor and staff on duty, before hooking Steve up to the monitors in the room.  

Suddenly Steve felt like he was going to pass out he was so tired. His eyes would droop shut, but he would force them back open. He didn’t want to sleep. Sleep was bad. He couldn’t control himself when he slept. 

“It’s okay,” Bucky whispered to him. “I’ll stay right here with you, promise. You’ll be safe.” 

Steve knew Bucky would keep his promise. And he was so tired. He didn’t protest as Bucky gently guided him to lay down and rest. 

 

Steve woke up in a panic. The phantom feeling of metal bands holding him down. 

“Steve, you’re okay! You’re in medical.”  

Steve looked around frantically. Bucky was standing next to him, hands raised in a calming gesture. Steve scanned the room and realized that Bucky was right, he was in the Medical wing of the Upstate facility, in one of the exam rooms. He even remembered how he had gotten there.  

Then he remembered what had happened before he got there and the feeling of panic returned. 

“Come on Steve, breathe. Don’t make me call Sam in here to do his calming shit on you.”  

Calming down. That reminded Steve of what Matt had had him do last night. He searched the room for five metal objects. 

There was a metal tray next to the bed, the IV stand, a clock, the rings on the privacy curtain, and Bucky’s arm. 

“You with me?” Bucky asked. He was trying to look calm but Steve could see the lines of stress around his eyes. 

“Yeah,” Steve croaked.  

Bucky moved to the sink nearby and filled up a cup of water. “Here,” he handed the water to Steve. 

Steve grabbed it and chugged it down. Bucky refilled the cup and Steve drained it again. Once he was feeling a little better, he noticed he was still hooked to the IV and the monitors. He took the IV out first, then went for the pads on his chest and temples. 

Bucky didn’t stop him, just turned off the heart monitor when the alarm went off because it thought Steve was flat lining. 

The alarm brought Bruce in. “Ah, I see you’re becoming a difficult patient again.” He said, smiling. “Always a good sign.” 

“Can I go?’ Steve asked, trying not to sound petulant. 

“Well the serum is completely out of your system as of twenty minutes ago,” Bruce said, looking down at the medical tablet he was holding. “You are probably going to have some residual effects from it, though.” 

“What kind of effects?” Steve asked worriedly.  

Bruce eyed Bucky, who took the hint.  

“I’ll go get you some more water,” Bucky said, then left the room.  

Bruce cleared his throat then began to fiddle with his stylist. “So, as you know, the serum acted as an extremely powerful aphrodisiac.” 

Steve felt his face go hot.  

Bruce looked just as uncomfortable. “And well, your body got, ah, revved up, but never, went anywhere.” 

Steve pinched the bridge of his nose. This was worse than crass innuendos. “Bruce,” he pleaded.  

Bruce took a deep breath, then blurted out, “Your body built up a reserve of semen in preparation for multiple orgasms. However, since you never reached a climax, you’re going to continue to be in a state of arousal until you do.” 

“I thought the serum was out of my system,” Steve said, feeling panicky again.  

“It is,” Bruce assured him. “This is just normal physiology. Your body prepared itself for sex. Just do what you would normally do to, um, relieve some stress. And everything will go back to normal.” 

Steve nodded. “Thanks Bruce. And thanks for, taking care of this yourself.” Steve said, as he gestured to the empty med bay.  

Bruce shrugged, “I figured you wanted some privacy.” 

That was an understatement, Steve thought. He was also extremely grateful that the rest of the Avengers were giving him space as well. “Am I free to go?”  

Bruce smiled. “Yes. Just report any unusual symptoms, alright?” 

Steve readily agreed and practically ran out of the room before Bruce could change his mind.  

Bucky was waiting for him in the hallway, holding two bottles of Gatorade. Steve grabbed one and chugged it down. “Thanks,” he said, after finishing the first and going for the second. 

“Sam’s getting food,” Bucky told him as they walked. 

“Thanks,” Steve said again. He drank the second Gatorade as he tried to think of what to say. He was sure Bucky and Sam wanted an explanation for why Steve hadn’t told them about what happened in France. But the longer they walked in silence, the harder Steve found it to speak. 

It was Bucky who broke the silence. “Sorry I yelled at you the other day.” 

Steve stopped. “What? Why are you apologizing?” 

Bucky shrugged. “Cause I was a jerk.” 

Steve shook his head in denial. “I was the one who was lying to everyone.” 

Bucky scoffed. “You’re an idiot if you think any of us are going to hold that against you.” 

Steve didn’t say anything, only thought how that may be true for most of the Avengers, but not Tony.  

As if Bucky could read his mind, he said, “And that goes for Stark too.” He emphasized this by poking Steve hard with a metal finger. “You may have been too out of it to notice, but I saw the look on his face when we came to get you. It was not the look of someone who was holding a grudge.” 

Steve tried to look as though he believed Bucky, even just a little bit. Bucky wasn’t fooled, but let it go anyway.  

They made their way back to Steve’s room, where Sam was waiting with food.  

The smell of pizza hit Steve hard, making his stomach rumble and his mouth water. Forgetting all awkwardness, Steve grabbed one of the boxes from the stack on the counter, and began to demolish it. Earning him a chuckle from Sam.  

“Try not to eat the cardboard while you’re inhaling that,” Sam said with a grin. He helped himself to some pizza. There was a quick scuffle with Bucky over a slice from the box Bucky had already claimed, ending with Sam emerging triumphantly with a piece of pepperoni with mushroom.  

His victory was short lived, however. As soon as Sam turned to grab his beer off the counter, Bucky grabbed the stolen piece and replaced it with another one. Sam immediately noticed the swap. 

“What the hell is this?” Sam asked, glaring down at the offending pizza.  

Bucky was obnoxiously chewing on the piece he had taken. “It’s pizza,” he replied, smirking around a bite.  

“No,” Sam shot back. “This is an abomination.” 

Steve leaned over to see that Bucky had put a piece of Hawaiian, Sam’s least favorite kind of pizza, on Sam’s plate. Steve had to choke down a snort of laughter.  

Bucky shrugged. “Then why did you order it?” 

“Because apparently Super-Soldiers don’t have taste buds and will eat anything.” Sam ground out. 

Steve listened to the two of them as they bickered back and forth, demolishing his pizza with gusto. He put a slice of his sausage and pepperoni on Sam’s plate and grabbed the offending pineapple covered slice to eat himself. Sam barely acknowledged it, too busy trying to get another slice of pepperoni and mushroom from Bucky.  

Steve finally took pity on Sam and grabbed the box from Bucky. 

“Thank you,” Sam said, as he accepted the pizza from Steve. “Nice to know somebody has my back around here.” He said, pointedly. 

Bucky smirked. “I have your back. I’m trying to make sure you can still fit in your bird costume.” 

Sam almost choked on his beer. “You did not just go there!” 

Steve let their banter distract him. It kept him from thinking about the day’s events. And it certainly helped distract him from the thrumming just under his skin. Bruce hadn’t been kidding when he said Steve was going to still suffer from arousal. 

Eventually, though, they finished eating and Sam and Bucky made to leave.  

“We’ll let you get cleaned up and get some rest,” Sam said, clapping him on the shoulder.  

“I’m fine,” Steve protested. “I got some sleep earlier, in the Medbay.” 

“Either way, you’ve been in that uniform since yesterday.” Sam pointed out. 

Steve couldn’t argue that. However, he didn’t want to tell Sam and Bucky the real reason he wanted them to stay was that he was worried about where his thoughts would go, once he was alone. 

“We going running in the morning?” Bucky asked. 

Steve nodded, distractedly.  

Bucky noticed and made sure to let Steve know he would come by and get him, first thing in the morning. 

Then Steve was alone in his rooms.  

He immediately set to work cleaning up the mess from the pizza. There wasn’t much of one, but Steve crushed down the boxes, and wiped off the counter thoroughly.  

After that, he decided he should probably at least change out of his uniform. He knew, logically, that he needed a shower too, but he hesitated to take one.  

Bruce had told him that he’d need to, let off some stress, because of the sex serum. But Steve didn’t want to go down that road again. Because he knew he’d start thinking of Tony again. Which immediately made him start thinking of Tony. 

Steve didn’t regret keeping Jessica safe from that stuff. He would do it again in a heartbeat. But being under the influence again, being unable to control himself. He’d wanted, and had really tried, to rip off Tony’s armor to get to him. The things he’d wanted to do to the other man. Steve shuddered as a bolt of arousal went through him. 

He staggered to the bathroom, tearing off his uniform as he went, tossing pieces aside. He got to the bathroom, turned the shower to full cold and forced himself under it. The icy water stung, but Steve didn’t care, it was having the effect he’d wanted. His erection was dying down. Though, frustratingly, not going away completely. He stayed under the spray as long as he could, doing his best to just focus on the cold and nothing else. 

When he couldn’t stand it anymore, he got out. Quickly drying himself off he pulled on jeans, a tight pair, and a shirt. 

He just needed to stay distracted. That was all. He wasn’t under the influence of the sex serum any more. Eventually his body would calm down. 

He went back out into the main area of his apartment in an attempt to find something to do. He had paperwork he could do. Or there was the book he’d been reading. And of course, there was always working out.  

Yes, he had a lot to keep himself busy. Unfortunately, he couldn't seem to concentrate. He’d start a task, then get distracted and stop what he was doing only to find himself randomly pacing his apartment. 

This went on for over half an hour before Steve gave up. He knew what he needed. The half erection pushing uncomfortably against his jeans let him know that. But if he tried to give himself some relief, he knew he’d end up thinking about Tony. Thinking about how good it had felt to kiss him. 

A surge of lust shot through Steve and he groaned out loud. Maybe it would be okay if he just masturbated once, just to take the edge off. He didn’t have to think about Tony. He could think about something else. 

He tried to conjure up an image of a pretty girl. Maybe one with soft curls and full lips- Tony's lips had felt amazing, and the way Tony had grabbed onto Steve while they kissed, like Tony had wanted it as bad as Steve had. 

A knock on Steve’s door interrupted him. He startled, and realized he had been breathing heavy and his hand was rubbing his crotch through his pants. 

He sprung up from the couch in horror. “Hold on,” he called out as he scrambled to find something to cover himself up with. He settled on a jacket that was hanging by the door, it hung down past to his mid thighs and would do to keep his condition hidden. 

The person knocked again. 

“Sorry, coming,” Steve called. He opened the door, expecting Bucky or maybe Natasha checking up on him. Instead, Tony was standing on the other side of it. 

 

* * *

 

When Tony had gotten back to the compound, he’d decided to distract himself by offering to help Hill with the processing of the bad guys. Hill had raised a perfectly sculpted eyebrow at him, but accepted the help. 

Natasha and Clint were on hand to help as well, and between the four of them, they somehow managed not to punch anyone in the face. Though it was a near thing what with the amount of bragging the main drug dealer seemed to want to do. The guy was not happy that he’d been hit by not one but two of Tony repulsor blasts and was trying to get back at Tony by antagonizing him. Tony was one more bad sex pun away from putting on the armor and seeing if a third blast would finally get the guy to shut up, when Nastasha intervened. 

And, true to form, she didn’t even need to lay so much as a finger on the guy to get him to shut up. 

They were in a holding cell with the guy, when a Shield agent just so happened to walk by with the mad scientist who’d started all of it. Tony had known that Barnes had socked the guy in the face, but that didn’t really prepare him for the sight of the guy in a neck brace, left eye covered in gauze and his face looking like the world’s ugliest balloon. 

Drug Dealer guy caught sight of the damage too. “What the fuck you do to him?” The guy demanded. “That’s police brutality.” 

Natasha glanced over her shoulder. “Oh, that.” She said with a shrug. “He had a slight altercation with the Winter Soldier. You know who that is, right?” Natasha asked Drug dealer guy. “James Barnes, former assassin, has a metal arm.” She locked eyes with Drug Dealer. “Best friend of Steve Rogers.” 

Drug Dealer guy went pale. 

Next to Tony, Clint shook his head sadly. “Poor guy, wouldn’t shut up about drugging Cap. Barnes just lost it.” 

Drug Dealer went even paler and snapped his mouth shut. 

“How long was Barnes wailing on the guy?” Tony asked, as if he was just mildly curious. 

Natasha, never looking away from their prisoner, answered. “That was just one punch.”  

Drug Dealer guy turned an odd green color. After that he was very cooperative.  

After fun with prisoners, and hearing from Natasha that he should talk to Steve, Tony went in search of Bruce. He found him in his lab, studying the serum.  

“The good thing about this stuff,” Bruce said. “Is that it is extremely unstable. Not only will it burn out quickly, but it also has a very limited shelf life. The samples you got from Parker are already degrading to the point of having almost no potency. Even the sample I put on ice is breaking down.” 

“So, any of this stuff left out there is going to become the equivalent of alcohol-free beer in the next few days?” Tony asked, studying the data that was pulled up on Bruce’s computer. 

“Essentially, yeah. It because Carmike designed it to work almost instantaneously.” Bruce explained. “From what I read in his notes, that was the only way he could guarantee someone enhanced wouldn’t metabolize it before it could take effect.” 

Tony grimaced at the memory of Steve becoming overwhelmed by the drug almost immediately. “Well, he sure succeeded there.” 

Bruce hummed in agreement. 

“This Steve’s blood work?” Tony asked, pointing at another screen. 

“Yeah. He’s cleared, I already released him.” 

“Any long-term effects we should be worried about?” Tony asked. He hadn’t had any from getting a dose of the “truth” serum, but then this was Steve’s second time and he’d had a much higher dose than the first time. 

Bruce shook his head. “Nothing that a nice long hot shower won’t fix. Or maybe three hot showers.” Bruce huffed a laugh. 

Tony looked over at Bruce, noticing the way Bruce was smiling. “What are you saying?” 

Bruce gestured at the screen, “That stuff got him extremely aroused, releasing hormones and triggering the prostate to create ample amounts of sperm. All that’s got to go somewhere.” 

Tony processed this revelation. “Huh.” He hopped up from the chair he had been lounging in. “Just remembered something I’ve got to do.” He made his way quickly out of Bruce’s lab. 

“Have fun,” Bruce called after him. 

He went back to his quarters. First thing first, he needed a shower. A really thorough shower. After that he put on a red silk thong, nice slacks that hugged his ass in all the best ways, then completed the look with a dark maroon silk button up shirt that he knew for a fact turned heads. He fixed his hair just so and splashed on just enough cologne that anyone in close proximity would catch a whiff of it. Then he grabbed a bottle of lube, stuck it in his pocket, and headed down to Steve’s apartment. 

He knocked on the door, heard Steve call from inside but then he didn’t answer, so Tony knocked again. The door finally opened to Steve in a long jacket, looking flustered.  

“You heading out?” Tony asked, concerned. Was Steve trying to run out again? 

Steve looked momentarily confused until Tony gestured at his jacket. “Oh, um, no. I was just, um, cold.” 

“Uh huh.” Tony couldn’t help noticing Steve’s flushed skin and dilated pupils. He doubted cold had anything to do with it. “Can I come in?” 

“Sure,” Steve stepped back, a little clumsily.  

Tony swept past him, making sure to get close enough that he could brush lightly against Steve as he did so. He got the satisfaction of hearing Steve’s breath hitch. “People keep telling me we should talk.” Tony said as he turned to face Steve. 

Steve cast his eyes down, looking glum. “They’re probably right.” Steve said as he shut the door. 

“Yeah, probably,” Tony conceded. Steve still wasn’t looking at him, which would not do at all. “Except, let’s not.” 

Steve looked up at him, brow creased. “What? Why?” 

Tony shrugged, letting the movement pull on the shirt in just the right way to outline his pecs. He caught Steve looking for a brief second before pulling his gaze away guiltily. “Well, I was thinking,” Tony said, as he slowly trailed one hand up his chest, watching with satisfaction as Steve’s eyes followed the movement greedily. 

“That talking,” he hooked a finger where the shirt came to a V at the top button, tugging the shirt lightly to open up the collar a bit, before gently undoing the button. “Isn’t,” he trailed his fingers down to the next button and undid it. “What we need.” He undid another button and tugged the shirt open a little more. He was rewarded by a hitch in Steve’s breathing as Tony exposed his chest to him.  

Tony took a step back, further into the room. Steve mirrored him and Tony took another step back to pull Steve along, before undoing another button.  

“I think,” another button undone. “What we need to do,” last button undone and Tony pulled his shoulders back to let the shirt fall completely open. Steve’s eyes were wide and his breathing was becoming harder. His hands were no longer gripping the coat, which had fallen open to reveal that Steve was very hard in his pants. Tony let his hands rest on the waist of his own pants. He hadn’t put on a belt, so the slight tug on the pants allowed them to drop lower, which, Tony knew, would show off the V of his abs. 

“Is just,” he ran a finger along the waist of his pants, stopping at the button there. A moan escaped Steve’s mouth as Tony popped the button open.  

“Fuck it out.” Tony pulled down the zipper of his pants, revealing the red thong that was hugging his erection.  

Suddenly Steve was right there, kissing Tony desperately. Tony pushed the ridiculous coat off Steve’s shoulders then went to work getting Steve’s shirt off. A task made nearly impossible because Steve had one arm wrapped around Tony’s back and the other was holding Tony’s head firmly in place as Steve fucked Tony’s mouth with his tongue. Tony tugged insistently on Steve’s shirt a few more times before Steve got the message and detached long enough to let Tony pull his shirt off. The second the shirt was gone, Steve grabbed Tony by the back of the neck and pulled him back in.  

Tony steered Steve back until his legs were touching the couch. “Down,” he commanded.  

Steve obediently dropped down onto the couch, staring hungrily up at Tony. Tony shrugged off his shirt, letting it fall off his shoulders and down onto the floor. Then he hooked his thumbs in the waist of his pants and pulled them down. Steve watched, enraptured, chest heaving.  

Tony stepped out of the pants and dropped down so that he was just barely on the couch, kneeling with Steve’s legs between his. He grabbed Steve’s jeans and quickly undid them. Only to find out that Steve hadn’t been wearing underwear.  

“Oh yeah,” Tony moaned as Steve groaned in relief. Then Steve was gasping and thrusting his hips up as Tony eased his cock out of the jeans and gently stroked it. Tony leaned in and kissed along Steve’s neck. “You were trying so hard to get me naked earlier, why don’t you tell me what you wanted to do to me if you had succeeded.” 

Steve swallowed. “I, I wanted to-” 

“Yeah?” Tony whispered, nipping at Steve’s neck. “What did you want? Tell me.” 

Steve’s hands were gripping Tony’s hips and Tony could feel how Steve was trying to hold back from just pulling Tony in close. “I wanted to, to-” Tony bit down harder and Steve gasped. “I wanted to take you.” He blurted out, his hands tightening their grip on Tony’s hips. 

Tony switched to the other side of Steve’s neck, licking a strip up his neck that made Steve groan. Tony continued to gently stroke Steve’s cock, appreciating the length and girth of it. “I believe,” Tony whispered in Steve’s ear, “the word you used was,” Tony caught Steve’s earlobe between his teeth and tugged gently before finally saying, “fuck.” 

Steve yanked Tony fully onto his lap. Tony moved his hand away from Steve’s cock so he could support himself on the back of the couch. Steve thrust his naked cock against Tony’s silk covered one, the feel of Steve so close, yet just out of reach made Tony moan. He brought his mouth back up to Steve’s and Steve moved eagerly to kiss him while they rocked together. 

Tony let Steve set the pace of their hips, but he took over the kiss, thrusting his tongue into Steve’s mouth, keeping the kiss hard and dirty. Steve sped up his thrusts in response, both hands firmly wrapped around Tony’s hips and pulling him in with each thrust.  

When Tony felt Steve was getting closer to climaxing, he broke off the kiss and returned his attention to Steve’s shoulder. He studied the defined muscle that ran from Steve’s beefy shoulder all the way up to his neck. He gave it on long sensual lick that made Steve groan. Then he bit down. 

Steve threw his head back, gasping in pleasure. Emboldened, Tony licked the muscle again and bit down harder. 

“Tony!” Steve yelled. He hauled Tony up even closer, thrusting madly against Tony’s clothed dick. Then he made a noise of frustration right before grabbing the fabric of Tony’s thong and ripping it off of him.  

Now Tony was the one gasping and thrusting his hips, the sensation of Steve’s cock rubbing against his almost too much. 

“Again.” Steve grabbed Tony’s head and pushed it down against his shoulder. “Please Tony, do it again.” 

Tony smiled wickedly. “Do what?” 

Steve made another noise of frustration. “Bite me. Bite me, again. Hard.” 

A thrill of pleasure went through Tony and he immediately bit down hard at the juncture of Steve’s neck and shoulder.  

Steve made a choked off sound as his whole body tensed up and Tony felt the hot cum as Steve’s dick pulsed between them. Tony almost came himself, but was able to hold it off at the last second.    

Tony pulled back so he could see Steve’s face. Steve looked like he was a little bit in shock. Tony couldn’t help smirking in pride at having caused it. He surged forward for a brief kiss, biting Steve bottom lip just hard enough to hear Steve gasp in pleasure. Then he moved back, sliding off of Steve’s lap. As he went, he grabbed Steve’s undone jeans and pulled them down and off. He tossed them aside, then grabbed his own discarded pants. He fished the bottle of lube out of the pocket, tossed it on the couch, and straddled Steve again.  

Steve’s dick was still hard. Tony stroked it, the shaft slick with cum.  

“Tell me what else you want,” Tony said. He brushed their lips together, just enough to excite Steve, but he pulled back when Steve tried to seal the kiss. “Tell me exactly what you want to do to me.” 

Steve’s arms were wrapped around Tony’s back, hands exploring. “I want to fuck you.” Steve said in a hushed tone. “I need to be inside you.” 

Tony hummed in satisfaction, kissing Steve and grabbing for the lube. “You better get to it then.”  

Steve fumbled to get the lube opened and poured a healthy amount onto the fingers of his left hand. Tony lifted his ass up to give Steve access. Steve hesitated.  

“I, I don’t really know what to do.” He admitted.  

Tony smiled indulgently down at Steve. He took Steve’s hand and guided it back towards his exposed ass. “I kinda figured that, so I already did most of the work for you.” Tony guided Steve’s hand to his hole and watched Steve’s face as Steve easily slide a finger into Tony. Steve’s eyes went wide as he realized Tony was already mostly prepped for him.  

“Oh.” Steve gasped. “Wow.” 

Tony encouraged Steve to add another finger. “And to be honest, I’m kinda impatient with this part anyway.” To prove his point, he rocked back on Steve’s hand, groaning in pleasure.  

Steve caught on and pushed up into Tony, adding another slick finger. “I want to fuck you so much.” Steve confessed.  

Tony rocked down onto Steve’s hand again. “Yeah, you said you’ve been dreaming of it?” 

Steve suddenly looked away, ashamed.  

Tony leaned down and kissed him gently. “I love it.” He breathed against Steve’s mouth. Steve looked up hesitantly. Tony kissed him again. “Tell me about it. I want to hear what dirty thoughts have been going through your head.” 

Steve swallowed, Adam’s apple bobbing, and Tony could tell that Steve was having a hard time with voicing whatever was running through his head. So, Tony decided to give him some help.  

“Did you dream about how good it felt to fuck me?” He squeezed Steve’s cock as he spoke. 

Steve moaned and nodded.  

“Did you dream about sliding in and out of my ass?” Tony stroked Steve’s cock, appreciating the thickness and length of it.  

“Yes!” Steve gasped out, like he was confessing a horrible secret.  

“What is it, baby?” Tony kissed along Steve’s cheek bone. “Tell me what’s bothering you.” 

Steve screwed his eyes shut. “I shouldn’t have. You, you didn’t know what had happened. And, I shouldn’t, I’m sorry. I should have told you.” Steve’s breathing was turning slightly frantic.  

Tony cupped his jaw and gently kissed the side of his mouth. “Shhh, it’s okay. The whole situation was fucked up. I’m not mad at you.” 

Steve opened his eyes and studied Tony’s face. “You’re not?” He asked, sounding very hopeful.  

Tony couldn’t help a small chuckle. “No,” he ground down on Steve’s hand, “I’m really not.” 

Steve’s breathing went back in the direction of really turned on and Tony smiled at him.  

“Though, if I don’t get to find out what this,” Tony squeezed Steve’s cock, “feels like inside me, real soon, I may get cranky.” 

Steve gasped, hips jerking up involuntarily. “Are you, um, are you ready?” He asked nervously, pushing his fingers up into Tony.  

Tony groaned. And instead of answering, he captured Steve’s mouth in a fierce kiss. He let go of Steve’s cock long enough to find the lube, slick him up really good, then guided Steve’s cock back towards his hole.  

Steve immediately pulled his fingers out of Tony’s ass, wrapped his hand around Tony’s and helped ease his cock to Tony’s hole.  

When the head of Steve’s cock found Tony’s opening, Steve lost all finesse with the kiss. 

Tony pushed down and was grateful that he had done a thorough job opening himself up earlier, when the head of Steve’s cock pushed in without too much trouble.  

“Yes!” Steve moaned into Tony’s mouth. “Oh yes!” Steve’s hand left his cock to grip the couch cushion instead, his other hand running up and down Tony’s thigh. “Tony, you feel so good.” 

Tony smirked. “It’s about to get a lot better.” And he slowly slid down onto Steve’s cock until he was fully seated. He stayed there for a bit, getting used to Steve’s girth and taking a moment to appreciate Steve Rogers falling apart underneath him.  

Steve was panting hard and it was making his pecs rise and fall in the most delicious way. Not to mention his washboard abs that were rubbing against Tony’s cock as it jutted against them. His hair was a mess, wet with sweat and sticking up every which way from where Tony had been running his hands through it. Some of Tony’s harder bites could still be seen along Steve’s shoulders and neck. There was a look of wonder on Steve’s face, along with cherry red, kiss swollen lips, and eyes glazed over in pleasure.  

“You’re beautiful,” Tony told him.  

Steve tilted his mouth up slightly, lips parted with need and Tony sealed their mouths together again at the same time as he began rocking his hips up and down Steve’s shaft. He started out slow, but picked up the pace quickly. Steve felt as amazing as he looked. His large dick easily rubbed against Tony’s prostate with every movement.  

Steve began thrusting his hips up, grunting and gasping into Tony’s mouth as they kissed. Both of Steve’s hands were exploring up and down Tony’s back, reaching down to cup his ass and pull him in closer, before traveling back up.  

Tony wrapped his arms around Steve’s neck as he found an easy rhythm. Just hard enough to keep the pleasure slowly building and give him time to savor the feel of Steve’s cock inside him. “You feel amazing,” he whispered in between kisses.  

“Tony!” Steve’s thrusts were starting to grow increasingly frantic. His hands wrapped around Tony’s hips, pulling him down onto Steve’s cock.  

Tony braced his hands on Steve’s shoulders and arched back, the new angle immediately pressing Steve’s erection hard against Tony’s prostate. “Fuck! That’s amazing.” 

Steve was watching Tony, wide-eyed. Tony arched back further, trusting Steve to keep him from falling, seeking just the right angle.  

Suddenly, Steve wrapped his arms around Tony, lifted them both up off the couch and down onto the floor, one arm snapping out to launch the coffee table out of their way, it hit the far wall with a loud crack. Then Tony was on his back, on the floor. Steve, kneeling between Tony’s legs, yanked Tony’s hips up and shoving inside him, then he stretched out over Tony, trapping Tony’s hands above his head as he began to fuck into Tony with fervor.  

Tony couldn’t do anything, trapped as he was under Steve’s body, except wrap his legs around Steve and try to focus on the extreme pleasure of Steve’s cock hitting his prostate so fast and so hard that Tony felt like he might come undone.  

Steve’s eyes were shut tight in concentration as he fucked Tony, grunting in pleasure and effort.  

Tony realized he was chanting Steve’s name over and over, like a mantra. He needed to come. He tried to get an arm free so he could jerk himself off but Steve had him pinned. He needed to come. Steve’s cock felt amazing, driving deep into Tony. He couldn’t think. He just needed to come.  

Steve was begging. “Tony, come for me. I need to feel it. Feels so good when you come with my dick in you. Please come. Let me feel it!” 

Steve was fucking Tony harder than Tony could ever remember being fucked. He could feel every hard inch of Steve’s cock as it massaged his prostate. He wanted to beg Steve to touch him, then the pleasure was building faster than Tony could process, Steve’s hips thrusting relentlessly. He cried out in sweet agony as he came with blinding speed. His cum hitting both their chests.  

Steve’s eyes snapped open. “Yes!” Then his hips slammed against Tony’s ass and he buried himself in, “Oh!” cock pulsing hot cum, face open with wonder at the pleasure he was feeling. Tony wanted to remember that look forever.  

The moment passed too quickly and Steve was pressing his face into Tony’s shoulder as they both gasped for air. Steve let go of Tony’s arms and wrapped him in a tight hug instead, rolling them both to the side so Steve wasn’t lying on top of Tony.  

Tony wished they could just lay there for a while. But the floor was hard and Steve was stubbornly keeping his head buried against Tony’s chest and Tony worried if he gave Steve too much time to recover that Steve might actually run naked from the room.  

“Shower.” Tony husked out.  

Steve startled and lifted his head. “W-what?” 

“We need a shower.” Tony nudged against Steve gently to encourage him to move.  

Steve obeyed, helping Tony up from the floor. Tony took Steve’s hand and led him to the shower where he turned the water on and pulled Steve under the warm spray.  

Steve was beginning to fidget, eyes refusing to look at Tony. Tony just gently cupped Steve’s face and kissed him slowly and tenderly for a minute until he felt Steve begin to relax.  

When he was sure Steve wouldn’t bolt, Tony let go of him long enough to find a washcloth and get a nice lather worked up with Steve’s body wash. Then he slowly worked over Steve’s entire body, cleaning every inch of him until Steve was hard again and panting with need.  

Tony dropped to his knees, the water from the shower cascading down as he looked up at Steve.  

Steve was looking back down at him, one arm braced against the wall of the shower. His cock was jutting out, level with Tony’s mouth.  

Tony leaned in and took just the head between his lips. Steve gasped and rocked his hips forward. Tony swirled his tongue around the head a few times, working Steve up more, then pressed the tip of his tongue against the sensitive underside.  

“Oh, Tony.” 

Tony teased the head of Steve’s cock a bit longer, bringing Steve close to the edge and backing off. Then Tony took a deep breath and slowly, carefully, began to ease Steve’s cock down his throat. He had never taken anyone as big as Steve before, but he was determined. And the look of pure ecstasy on Steve’s face as his cock slid down Tony’s throat was more than enough encouragement. It took more than one try to make it work, each time he would take just a little bit more down his throat as Steve gasped and cursed above him. Finally, he was able to slide Steve’s cock all the way in until his lips were wrapped around the base and he was grabbing at the perfect globes of Steve’s ass to ground himself.  

Steve’s legs were shaking from the effort of holding himself still. He was practically hunched over Tony, face screwed up, gasping against the sensation of his dick down someone’s throat.  

Tony pulled off, gasped for some air, then took him straight down again.  

“Ah!” Steve gasped.  

Tony hummed, long and wanton. Steve screamed with pleasure. Tony pulled off again, got a few good breaths of air, went down and swallowed around Steve’s length.  

“FUCK! Fuck, Tony!” 

Tony kept swallowing. The convulsions of his throat massaging Steve’s dick. Steve was screaming Tony’s name, hips stuttering as pleasure overtook him. He grabbed Tony’s head with both hands to hold him in place as he came straight down Tony’s throat.  

Steve pulled out of Tony, body trembling from pleasure, and he had to catch himself on a shelf to prevent himself from collapsing in the shower.  

Tony was feeling very smug. “You okay there, Rogers? Your old man heart gonna give out on you?” 

Steve tried to glare at him, but the effect was lost as he was still trying to catch his breath and keep himself steady. “I liked you better when I’d rendered you speechless,” Steve managed to gasp out. 

Tony laughed. He got back to his feet, turned off the shower, then helped Steve out of the stall. Steve only had one towel in his bathroom, but it was one of those large, fluffy, over-sized ones. Tony used it to get them both dried off.  

He then led Steve out of the bathroom and straight to bed, not bothering to collect any of their clothes, and climbed into bed with him. 

Steve’s eyes were heavy with the blissed-out fatigue that comes from a really good orgasm. Or, in Steve’s case, three orgasms. Still, he looked like he wanted to talk. 

“Tony-” he began. 

Tony interrupted him with a gently kiss. “Not tonight,” he said. “We’ll talk tomorrow. Okay?” 

“Okay.” 

Tony pressed against Steve’s warm, naked body. Steve wrapped him up in his big, muscled arms and Tony actually heard him sigh happily. 

“Though,” Tony added, kissing Steve’s jaw, “I can’t promise I won’t get distracted by that monster you call a dick.” 

“It’s not that big.”  

“You’re right. I’m sure Hulk has you beat. Maybe even Thor, too.” 

“Thor wishes he had me beat.” Steve mumbled, sleepily. 

Tony chuckled, face pressed against Steve’s chest. He wondered if he could casually work that into a conversation with Thor. He snuggled in closer to Steve, tangling their legs together. He lifted his head up to tell Steve his idea for getting Thor to demand a comparison, but Steve’s eyes were already closed, breathing evening out as he fell asleep. Tony kissed him softly before snuggling back down under the covers and drifted off. 

 

* * *

 

 

Someone was banging on a door and shouting Steve’s name. Years of conditioning had Steve awake and sitting bolt upright in bed, trying to determine where the threat was coming from. 

He realized two things almost immediately. The first being that he was completely naked. The second being that Tony, who was also naked, was still in bed with him.  

These realizations were followed by the even more important realization that Bucky was the one yelling his name and it was now coming from inside Steve’s apartment. 

Before Steve could come up with any kind of plan of action, his bedroom door was thrown open and Bucky was standing there looking worried. 

“What the hell happened? Your coffee table is in pieces! Was there a-” Bucky stopped, eyes training in on Tony who was groggily trying to pull the bed spread up over his head. Bucky then glanced back at Steve, noting his naked chest. He looked back over at Tony and then he broke into the biggest shit-eating grin Steve had ever seen on his friend's face. “What’s going on?” 

“Um,” Steve said, intelligently. 

Tony, however, had no problem coming up with something to say. “Get the hell out of my room, Barnes.”  

Bucky crossed his arms over his chest and casually leaned against the doorframe. “Oh, this isn’t your room, Stark.” Bucky pointed out, oh so helpfully. “This is Steve’s room.” 

“It’s my building,” Tony growled as tried to burrow down into the bed. “I should be allowed to sleep wherever I want without getting woken up at the butt-crack of dawn by unwanted house guests.”  

Bucky wasn’t phased in the least. “Well I just came by to get Steve for our morning run.” Bucky’s face split into a huge grin again, “But I can see he’s already got his morning exercise all lined up.” 

Steve blushed and dropped his head down to his hands. “Buck,” he pleaded. 

A pillow went flying across the room, launched by a disgruntled Tony. He missed Bucky by about three feet, but Bucky still decided to take it as a dismissal and left the room, laughing his head off. “I can’t wait to tell this to Wilson.” He heard Bucky say as he left. 

“I hate your friends,” Tony grumbled into his pillow. 

“Sometimes I do too.” Steve said, head still cradled in his hands. He eventually composed himself enough to look over at Tony. Tony had bundled himself up in the blankets and was trying to ignore the sunlight streaming in through the window. Steve slid out of bed, pulled on a pair of sweat pants and went out to make some breakfast. 

He had to stop and stare at the mess they had made. Clothes were tossed around the room and the coffee table was lying on its side, a crack running down the middle. No wonder Bucky had been worried and barged into Steve’s room. Steve caught sight of a scrap of red fabric and immediately blushed as he remembered tearing the underwear off of Tony. 

Steve dead-bolted the door to his apartment to prevent anymore unannounced guests before he could clean up, then went about making some coffee and breakfast. His phone chimed from somewhere by the couch and Steve fished it out of the pocket of his discarded jeans. 

There was a text from Sam that just said, ** _“DAMN, SON!”_ **  

Steve sighed and pocketed the phone. A minute later there was a text from Clint that was a GIF of a man smiling and giving a thumbs up. 

Steve thunked his head against one of the cabinets in the kitchen.  

The next text was from Bruce, with a GIF of a man going “Oh yeah!” Steve couldn’t believe Bruce had sent it, until he got a second text.  _**“Sorry about that, Clint got a hold of my phone."** _  

When his phone pinged again a minute later, he was afraid to look. Morbid curiosity won out. Fortunately, it was a text from Natasha. 

 **_“I’ve sufficiently threatened them into behaving themselves for now.”_ **  

Steve sent a quick thanks back. 

Natasha sent him another text.  ** _“Tell Stark that while this wasn’t quite what I meant when I said you two needed to talk, I still approve.”_ **  

Steve smiled at Natasha’s text, then put his phone away so he could carry two cups of coffee and a plate of bagels into the bedroom. He heard Tony arguing with someone and walked in to see Tony looking down at his phone. 

“I’m not lying, I’m with Steve. Wait, here he is.” Tony looked up at Steve. “Steve, tell Pep I can’t make the meeting this morning because we need to work out our issues.” And then Tony was flipping around the screen to show an exasperated looking Pepper. 

 _“Oh!”_ Pepper exclaimed, through the video feed. _“Oh, ah, good, good m-morning St-Steve.”_

Steve was frozen in place, very aware that he was only wearing sweat pants that were riding very low on his hips and no shirt. And that the way he had instinctively tried to hunch up was probably doing nothing to hid anything. “Ah, hi.” He said, lamely. 

Pepper was staring, wide-eyed. _“Okay, well, um, I’ll just let you two finish- I mean! Not, um.”_ Pepper visibly swallowed. _“Wow,”_ She said, eyes going from Steve’s chest down to his hips. _“Just, wow. I’m gonna, I’ve got to go.”_ And she ended the call. 

Tony turned the phone back around and looked down at the blank screen. “I can’t believe that worked.” 

Steve rolled his eyes. “Glad I could be of help.” He handed Tony a mug and a bagel.  

Tony ignored the bagel and went straight for the coffee. “So, my morning meeting has been canceled,” Tony said, after half the coffee was gone. “What shall we do instead?” He leered. 

“Talk.” Steve said, firmly. 

Tony sighed. “Fine.” 

Steve had been trying to rehearse what he would say while he made breakfast, but now that he was here with Tony, all thoughts escaped him. “I’m- I, um.” He couldn’t even look at Tony, instead he picked sesame seeds off his bagel. Why was it still so hard to talk about it? Tony already knew what happened. He’d seen the video and even seen Steve doped up on the sex drug in person. So why did it feel like Steve’s throat was closing up like he still had some horrible secret? 

Tony reached over and grabbed Steve’s hand. “Hey.” 

Steve looked up at Tony. “I’m sorry.” He managed to get out. 

“Why?” 

“I didn’t tell, I couldn’t tell you. I messed up, again.” Steve felt tears at the corner of his eyes. Why was this so hard? 

Tony put down his mug and moved closer to Steve. “Shh, it’s okay. I’m not mad, I promise.” 

Steve swallowed down his tears. “You were.” 

Tony sighed. “Yeah, I’m sorry. I overreacted. I jumped to a lot of conclusions and I was wrong. I thought you were keeping secrets from me, just like the last time.” 

“I was keeping secrets,” Steve protested. He’d screwed up. It couldn’t just be dismissed because they had had sex.  

But Tony was shaking his head. “No, it’s not like the last time. Oh honey, you still don’t see it do you?” 

Steve frowned, “See what?” 

Tony cupped Steve’s face on his hands. “This isn’t about you choosing to keep a secret. This is about you having a hard time talking about a trauma you went through.” 

“You sound like Matt,” Steve huffed. 

“Well Matt was right. Who is Matt?” 

“Matt Murdock is Daredevil,” Steve explained. “He’s the blind lawyer from Hell’s Kitchen. The one who helped take down Wilson Fisk.” He added when Tony still looked confused. 

Tony nodded. “Oh, that guy. So, a lawyer, who often deals with victims, noticed you were, what?” Tony prompted. 

Steve ducked his head, “That I was showing signs of having gone through a trauma.” 

Tony hummed “Anything else?” 

Steve sighed in resignation. “That being unable to talk about the trauma was normal.” 

“I like this guy. Remind me to send him something. What do lawyers like?” 

“We do need to talk, though,” Steve reminded him. 

“Oh yes, absolutely.” Tony said. “Mostly I wanted to apologize for the whole overreaction the other day. Which I have done. I was even going to give Barnes some semblance of an apology. But after his little stunt this morning, he’ll be lucky if I don’t magnetize his arm and stick him to the refrigerator.” 

Steve couldn’t help laughing at the mental image that brought. 

“Mostly, though,” Tony said, leaning in to kiss along Steve’s jaw and send shivers of pleasure along Steve’s spine. “I wanted to talk about us.” 

“Us?” 

“Mmhmm.” Tony smiled up at Steve. “Like, maybe, if you’d like to have dinner with me tonight?” 

“Dinner?”   

“Yes. Dinner. You and me. Somewhere romantic. Then we could come back to my apartment, that is Barnes proof, and explore each other's bodies some more.”  Tony accented the idea by pressing his naked body against Steve’s. 

Steve quickly put down his bagel and then pulled Tony up onto his lap. “Dinner sounds great,” Steve agreed, unable to keep the giddy smile off of his face.  

He was rewarded by Tony smiling back at him and kissing him. “It’s a date, then.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's a wrap! Hope you enjoyed the ending. I wanted to bring things back around to almost mirror the beginning as far as how Steve and Tony had sex, except this time both are undrugged and able to enjoy the experience. I also wanted to tie up the idea that Steve wasn't keeping secrets completely on purpose, but that he just couldn't bring himself to talk about it because the experience was traumatizing.  
> The scene with Bucky walking in on Tony and Steve was actually something I had wanted to work into Blank Space, but it just hadn't fit, so I was happy I was able to use it here. :)  
> Speaking of emotional trauma, who's ready to be devastated by Avengers:Endgame? Not me, that's for sure.  
> Thanks for reading and for all the comments and kudos. I give you all kudos in return!

**Author's Note:**

> Story title and chapter titles from the song "Telling Stories" by Tracy Chapman  
> Comments Please


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